His Luna, Her Choice

Chapter Five

JASPERS POV

"I need to talk to you."

I was flustered, and in a rush. The scary part was I was in a rush to get away from Violet. I kept telling myself that it was simply because I needed answers, I needed to talk to my Beta and Gamma. But the cold truth was I just wanted to be away from her. Ehno was bitching and growling at me, refusing to listen to me.

"You look like shit." Ashwell commented, narrowing his eyes at my disgruntled appearance.

"I feel like shit." I slumped into my chair, scarping a hand down my face. King was watching me with a knowing expression, one that annoyed me more than I already was.

"What?" I snapped at him.

He shrugged. "I take it lunch didn't go well?"

"Not particularly." I admitted.

"Bad food?" Ashwell asked.

"The food was fine. Great, as usual. The problem was..."

"Violet." King finished my sentence. Ashwell raised one eyebrow, looking between the two of us questioningly.

"What's going on with the Luna?"

I groaned. I had to tell them though. I needed to tell somebody!

"Nothing is wrong with her, as far as I know. The problem is me. I... I don't want to be around her. I don't want to touch her, or have her touch me. The sight of her makes me angry! And I don't know why!" I looked at the men sitting across from me, desperate. "Please tell me this is normal? Tell me this happens with mates, and it'll go away."

Now both brows were raised, going up to Ashwell's hairline. His face was morphed into confusion and disbelief. King, on the other hand, looked thoughtful.

The seconds ticked by, and I grew more and more anxious with their silence.

Finally, thankfully, King spoke. "I've never heard of something like that happening with mates before. I know I sure didn't go through it with my mate."

"Me either. Sorry."

My bark of a laugh startled them. "Seriously? So, what? I'm just the shittiest mate ever?" Another laugh escaped me as my head fell into my hands.

"Well, that's just f*****g terrific." I mumbled.

"We're not saying that." Ashwell quickly jumped in. "Maybe it's just, you know, this. Being Alpha. No offense Jasper, but you were never trained to be an Alpha. You have the blood, but you were thrown into the job with no experience. Maybe the stress is just getting to you."

"He could be right. Another factor to consider is that the Luna is a new breed of wolf. That might also have something to do with it." King said.

I peeked through my fingers at them. "Violet said... At lunch, she said her magic might be the reason for her physical changes."

King nodded slowly. "I can see that. Perhaps her magic is affecting the bond as well. Or maybe you two are just having an off day. You know, it is possible for couples, even mated couples, to fight."

"We hardly ever fight though." I dropped my hands to my lap, sighing.

"Hardly ever being the keywords. Get through today, and I bet you'll feel better tomorrow."

"Yeah. Don't worry until you absolutely need to."

They both sounded so reassuring. I took a breath through my nose, resolving to put my bizarre mindset toward my mate aside for now.

It would work out. This was Violet after all- The girl I'd been in love with since I was a kid. I doubted anything could change my feelings for her.

"Alright, let's start working." I said. King immediately handed me a stack of papers that I dove into.

And that's how I spent the rest of my day, I was cooped up in my office. Even after Ashwell and King left for the day, I stayed in that room, burying myself in whatever work I could find. Quite honestly, it wasn't as if I lacked work. As Alpha, there was always something.

Time flew by without much notice or care from me. I only stopped when I felt someone trying to link me.

"Hey. The kids are going to bed. Do you want to come to say goodnight?"

I started, eyes going to the clock. I knew it was late, but that late?

"Yeah. Be right there." I told Violet, closing the link.

Closing my laptop, I exited my office. The kid's room was only a few doors down- I could hear Violet giggling with Cam. For a second, my steps faltered, and I wondered if I was going to have the same aversion to my pups as I was towards Violet.

The thought scared the s**t out of me. But when I rounded the doorway, I let out a sigh of relief as I looked them over. Love and happiness rushed through me, the same as every other day.

"Daddy's here!" Violet announced. She smiled at me, but her eyes held a bit of caution as well.

"Dada!" Camillia walked as fast as her little legs would carry her, and I scooped her up.

"Hey, baby girl. How was your day?" I kissed her nose.

"I drew a picture!" She announced proudly.

"Really! What did you draw?"

"A Vi-... A Vi... A flower!"

Violet held up what I assumed was Cams drawing of a violet. I oohed and aahed at it, telling her how pretty it was.

"Dada?" Drew pulled on my pant leg.

"Yeah, buddy?"

"I seepy."

"Awe, okay bud. Let's get you guys into bed."

I took Carson and Drew while Vie got Cam. We changed them, washed their faces and hands and finally settled them down. Just like every other night, Violet picked a book from the shelf in their room, settling down in the rocking chair near their beds.

It was a story she'd read a thousand times to them, and usually I loved to listen to her as I gave the kids a kiss goodnight each. Tonight, however, I just wanted to leave.

"Dada, you okay?" Carson asked me softly. Out of the three kids, he was the most well spoken so far.

"I'm good Car." I bent down, kissing his forehead gently. "I love you. Have a good sleep."

"Dada stay!" Cam demanded. Violet stopped reading, looking up at me with confusion.

"You're not going to stay for the story?" She asked.

I grit my teeth at the urge to snap at her. "Not tonight. I'm tired. Sorry guys."

Cam slumped back in bed, pouting. I gave her, and Drew their kisses and then left the room, feeling my mate's stare on my back.

Another first for me. I never skipped out on story time.

As soon as I was in our room, I went directly to the shelf above the fridge. Pulling down the bottle of whiskey, I grabbed a glass and poured it. I downed the whole thing, barely feeling the burn of the liquid.

Vie came in as I was pouring my third glass. I felt her presence behind me, but didn't turn. She waited as I downed the third glass, then the fourth.

The silence was awful, filled with rising tension.

"Are you going to stand and there and watch me drink?" I asked after a while. When she didn't answer, I finally turned to look at her. Her arms were crossed, and she was staring at me like I was a puzzle she was trying to solve.

"Where were you all day?" She eventually spoke.

"Working."

"All day?"

"Yes." I poured another glass. "I'm backed up."

"Then why don't you give some stuff to me? Obviously, it's tiring you out. I could help take some of the load off your shoulders."

"I don't need the help, but thanks."

I stared at the countertop while she stared at me. When I felt her move, I cringed internally. Violet came to stand in front of me, trying to catch my eye.

"What is going on with you?" She asked.

"Nothing. As I said, I'm tired."

"I get that. But.."

Picking up the whiskey bottle, I was disappointed to see it was empty. Damn.

"You won't even look at me." She finished.

Putting my glass in the sink, I sighed. "Sorry."

"I don't want a sorry Jasper."

Why couldn't she just leave it alone?

"Then what do you want?" I had to strain to keep my tone casual now.

"An explanation. You've been acting weird all day. At lunch, and then with the kids-"

I spun around, a foreign feeling rushing through me. What was that? Violet took a step back.

"I'm sorry I didn't take you up on your offer to have s*x, alright? Or maybe I'm not. It was the middle of the day, and we were both working. You do remember work right?"

"Jasper, what-"

I cut her off again. "Yes, working. As in, I, the Alpha, have a lot of work to do and don't have time to always bow down to your needs. And I'm not always going to be able to sit and listen to a bedtime story, Violet. Don't berate me over this s**t!"

Her mouth was hanging open, astonishment clear on her face. Between the end of my rant and her reply, I put a name to what I was feeling. Anger. I was angry at her. It baffled me, because I couldn't remember a time or instance I was ever angry at her. Frustrated, yes. Worried about her, yes. But angry? No. Even in the rare events, we did argue, I was never angry. But here I was, seemingly unable to control it.

"I never assumed you would be there every time!" She snapped. "Maybe I wouldn't be asking about it if I didn't feel like the reason you left had something to do with me, instead of actually being tired."

It felt like my brain disconnected from my body. My mouth opened, and words flew out before I could stop them.

"Oh, I forgot. Everything is about you." I bit back. "Why is it so hard for you to accept I have a lot on my plate right now?"

"I never said you didn't! I offered to help!"

"That's what I have a Beta and Gamma for! I don't need your help! I don't want your help!"

"Why are you acting like this?!"

"Because of you!" I shouted and she jumped. "What did I do today? I woke up, went to get breakfast, and f**k, if it wasn't for you, I would have had some! Then I arrange a lunch for us, and you're late. Then you want to distract me from the massive amount of work I have piled up. And now you're trying to make me feel guilty because I didn't stay for one f*****g bedtime story?!"

My hand fisted, coming down on the counter, hard. The drawers underneath shook with the impact.

I glared at her, totally unbothered by the tears brimming her lower lashes. My breath was coming in heavy pants, and my hands shaking.

"Y-you're angry... because I took a sandwich?" She whispered. "Are you for real?"

A single tear escaped her eye, running over her smooth skin. The sight of it brought some sense back to me. Like someone had flipped a switch, the burning rage I was feeling started to abate. Shock replaced it, and a big dose of disgust. Disgust with myself.

What the Hell did I just do?

"Vie... I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of that." I swallowed hard. I reached for her, but she held her hands out, warning me to stop.

"I'm going to bed."

All I could do was watch helplessly as she walked away from me, crawling into bed and scooting as far as she could to the edge without falling out.

She had never gone to bed without saying she loved me. Today was just full of firsts, and none of them I liked.