He Kissed Me Crazy

The Jaunt into Old Memories

Caesar: [Do you regret what happened at the party?]

Tucker stared down at his phone for a while as he munched on lunch in the café the following day. ‘Stephanie’ hadn’t answered Kendell, so Tucker guessed it made sense why Kendell was asking that question now.

Hell, yes, I regret what happened.

That’s exactly what he should say, too.

Kendell was giving him an out, and he should damn well take it.

No better opportunity.

He picked up his phone and started texting back.

[Yes, I regret it. It was a drunken mistake. I’m sorry.] With a great sigh, Tucker pressed Send.

It was perhaps ten seconds later when Kendell replied back.

Caesar: [Was it not true then… when you said that you liked me?]

Tucker winced. s**t. He shouldn’t have said that. F*ck. He hadn’t thought that Kendell would take it—take the girl—so damn seriously. It’s not like it was the first time a girl had confessed to Kendell. It shouldn’t have been a big deal. What was so different this time?

Okay, it wasn’t actually a girl this time, but Kendell didn’t know that. He didn’t even know what she looked like, even if it had been a girl.

So, what the hell? It didn’t make sense.

[It doesn’t really matter. I don’t want to be in a relationship with you.] Tucker sent the message and hoped that would be enough for Kendell to lose interest.

Caesar: [Why not?]

Damn it, Kendell, LOSE INTEREST already!

[Because you’re not my type.] At least that was the truth.

Caesar: [I don’t believe that.]

Tucker frowned at the weird twinge his heart did in response to those words.

Kendell was acting strange.

A girl had just told him she wasn’t interested and yet he was still persisting? That was so unlike him.

Other than that one time…

[Are you drunk right now?]

That would explain his uncharacteristic determination.

A few minutes went by when Tucker just stared at his phone, sipping his coffee while he waited for Kendell to respond.

Why wasn’t Kendell responding?

Was he drunk?

Tucker shook his head at the idea. Of course not. Not Kendell.

Maybe he was in classes…

“Why are you staring at your phone so intently?”

Tucker flinched so hard hot coffee spilled out onto his hand and he yelped, quickly putting his cup down as he just so quickly spun his phone upside down on the table. “Damn it, Kendell, don’t surprise—”

Tucker cut off on a strangled gasp when Kendell grabbed his scalded hand and, with napkins from the dispenser in front of Tucker, quickly wiped all the coffee off, sitting down in the seat next to Tucker while he did so.

Something strange was moving through him as Kendell continued to hold his hand, giving him tickles up his spine, and he quickly tore his hand from Kendell’s so he could finish wiping off his hand himself, in his jeans.

Kendell raised a brow at Tucker, not responding as he scrunched up the wet napkins and turned to toss them away. Then gave him a lopsided smile, his arms coming to rest on the table. “Were you waiting for a text?” he asked lightly.

“No,” Tucker said quickly, hopefully not too quickly. “I was—” He quickly picked up his phone and, keeping it turned subtly away from Kendell, tapped out of the messenger app and into a new tab. “—looking to see what my next class was because I couldn’t remember.”

Kendell’s smile grew wider as Tucker spoke, and Tucker couldn’t help but get the impression Kendell didn’t believe him.

But he didn’t ask any more questions about it and just ordered a coffee for himself before rejoining Tucker at the table.

“How are your classes going anyway?” Kendell asked casually, setting his coffee down and sitting back in his seat as he stretched out his legs. Right between Tucker’s legs and under his seat.

“F*ck off, Kendell,” Tucker said, harassed, as he quickly lifted his legs and grabbed one of Kendell’s knees to shoved Kendell’s legs back from him.

“Whoops, my bad,” Kendell said with a grin, not even pretending he wasn’t up to his old tricks again.

“You can’t be doing that if you’re going to get a girlfriend,” Tucker said harshly, to cover up the strange thudding of his heart.

“What does that have to do with having a girlfriend?” Kendell said easily, his eyes practically twinkling with laughter.

Tucker felt his cheeks heat as Kendell got exactly what he wanted: Tucker, embarrassed, unable to say something in response.

“Where is the quiet dude that just had his head down and did his homework?” Tucker finally managed to retort.

Kendell suddenly sat up and leaned in, his eyes growing intent in a way that made Tucker lean back away from him. “He was left behind when it became apparent that the person he liked would never look at him twice if he didn’t make them look.”

Tucker swallowed, not sure what to say to that. It was definitely not the answer he had expected.

Kendell leaned back again, his smile softening. “I don’t miss him, either. This way is much more fun.”

“Who did you like?” Tucker blurted out, then clicked his teeth shut.

He hadn’t even known he was going to ask that.

Kendell grinned wide, and Tucker was struck with how good that smile looked. Damn, he shouldn’t be single. “I don’t think that matters anymore.”

Tucker frowned. “What? Yes, it does. You never told me about her at all in high school. Never introduced me. I introduced you to all of my—”

“Yeah, I remember,” Kendell cut in, his smile dimmed as he shook his head. “I never got to date them.”

“Oh.” Tucker said, feeling like an ass. “Sorry.”

“It’s all right,” Kendell said as he looked away, his expression becoming pensive. “I like to think it just wasn’t our time.”

---

Damn it.

Tucker flopped himself down on his bed that evening after work and shoved his face into the pillow.

He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the mysterious girl that Kendell liked when they were in high school.

He didn't know why it was bugging him so much.

He had begun to wonder if she even existed. It would be just like Kendell to make her up just so it would whir in Tucker’s brain, making him wonder who she was and how he hadn't noticed her, until he couldn’t take it and ask again.

It just didn’t make sense that there hadn’t even been a whisper of her before now. Unless…

Tucker sat up onto his knees as a thought occurred to him.

What if… it was one of my ex-girlfriends?

Tucker put his hand to his mouth, a little taken aback as he thought about the girls he had been with. s**t, it makes sense. Of course Kendell wouldn’t have told him about it if it was someone Tucker had—or soon would have been—dating. And now, a year or more later, maybe he’d gotten over it enough to mention it. Tucker winced, looking blindly towards Kendell’s room. He wasn’t over her enough to tell me her name, though…

This obvious answer still wasn’t enough for Tucker though. He suddenly wanted to know the kind of girl Kendell would have been into so much that he had changed his ways just to catch her attention.

But it didn't work, I guess. Tucker felt his heart pain in sympathy. That sucks.

Tucker laid back on his bed, folding his hands together and frowning as he contemplated the first time Kendell had changed his manner.

Tucker's mouth twisted with irritation at himself.

He had no idea.

It had only just occurred to him that Kendell was a lot more quiet when they had first met. He'd once been more...moody. Not that interested in making small-talk... Scowly.

Tucker chuckled at the memory. They had been seated right next to each other when Kendell had transferred to Tucker’s school, his parents being part of the military, and he'd been one to keep to himself at all times.

He had not been interested in making friends with Tucker at all.

Ignored him a lot back in those early days.

So different…

At some point, Kendell had morphed into someone who could talk to others comfortably, could even joke and tease... He still wasn’t what you’d call a social butterfly though. Still hated parties, after all.

Tucker never did ask why…

Was it because of the alcohol? Terrible hangovers would probab—

Tucker sat up with a start.

Kendell hadn’t had a hangover the day after the party.

Tucker had been so distracted, so relieved that Kendell hadn’t realized who had kissed him, Tucker hadn’t even really thought about that old lie.

But Kendell had slipped up, too. He’d forgotten to at least pretend he was sick.

So, that means I can ask him why he kept up the lie all this—

Oh.

Maybe it was because of Drunk Kendell. The brazen, get-in-your-face, whole ‘nother level of flirtatious Kendell.

Yeah, that was something to avoid.

Had Kendell done something he shouldn't have back in their highschool years?

Tucker felt his face heat. Not that he was any better, apparently.

Shit, why did I do that?

Tucker wasn’t a flirtatious drunk. He would have been told off plenty of times by now if he were. He certainly hadn't refrained from drinking over the years. No, but he was a happy, chatty drunk. He had been told that many times.

“Don’t you want… to kiss me?” Kendell’s words replayed in his mind and Tucker felt a little shiver up his spine at that voice.

You’re to blame. You and that voice.

Restlessly, Tucker stood and walked out to the kitchen, trying to find something to occupy himself with. He felt hungry but couldn't figure out what it was he wanted. He found himself staring at the fridge in silence.

Then, he moved and opened the fridge to look at all the leftover beers not used since the party.

He was pretty certain neither he nor Kendell had touched the stuff since.

Tucker tapped his fingers on the fridge door handle he still held.

Then he closed the fridge door.

You want to drink now? You must be out of your mind.

Tucker stared at the fridge some more.

He kind of did.

He swallowed.

And, for some reason, he wanted Kendell to join him.

Just one. Tucker pulled the fridge door open again and pulled out a beer. He moved to the utensils drawer and pulled out the bottle opener. I’ll just have one. And he can join me if he wants… or not if he doesn’t want to. Need to drink them at some point, anyway.