Jaded Anchor: The Wolf

Chapter Five - Alexandra

Alexandra laid in bed that night tossing and turning. She was more than exhausted but sleep somehow evaded her. She kept playing Rowen’s words over and over in her mind, “I missed you, Lexie.” He missed her. He had been honest and open about why he had ended things and she knew he had been right. Being with Rowen tonight had made her feel more than she felt the past year she had been in a relationship with Carter. What was she going to do? It wasn’t normal to have these feelings for Rowen when she was in a committed relationship with Carter. Go to sleep, Alexandra. You can torture yourself on the drive back to Tuscaloosa. Her inside voice quipped causing her to groan.

Alexandra laid there for a little bit longer, counting sheep in her mind. She giggled slightly at herself when her inner wolf growled at the sight of the sheep in her head. Squeezing her eyes closed she tried counting backward from 100 slowly. She tried to steady her breathing, trying some of the relaxing techniques that she used in her yoga classes. It was utterly useless, nothing seemed to work. She was too tired to fall asleep, and that made absolutely no sense to her. Throwing off the comforter she slowly slipped from Rowen's surprisingly comfortable guest bed.

Alexandra’s bare feet padded silently down the hall, holding her breath when she passed Rowen’s bedroom door. She didn’t want to wake him up. Once she reached the stairs, she took one step at a time trying to make as little noise as possible. She was headed to the door. Her thinking was that maybe a good run would help her sleep. She had tried everything else so what did she have to lose? Plus, she was itching to shift again.

Once she stepped outside, she glanced around thankful that Rowen had no neighbors. She pulled his shirt over her head along with her bra and panties. Alexandra left them in a neat pile on the porch before she walked completely naked onto the sandy beach. It had been so long since she shifted, she had been afraid she had lost her ability. Closing her eyes, she counted to three and pulled her wolf forward.

A naked human no longer stood on the beach. In her place now stood an auburn-red colored wolf. Her wolf ran around in circles glad to be free for the first time in six years. Alexandra ran up and down the shore for an hour until finally she finally shifted back. She climbed the stairs of the porch smiling like a bride on her wedding day. She had been almost certain that her wolf had left her. It had been so long since she felt that type of freedom. She couldn’t wait to move to Silverport so she could do that more often.

Silently she slipped her bra and panties back on. Her hand slowly reached out to push the door open after she had the long shirt back on. Rowen’s shirt came down to her knees almost. Alexandra had been so concentrated on being silent that she hadn’t noticed Rowen standing next to the refrigerator.

“Lexie? What are you doing?” Rowen looked over at her. He was shirtless and his face held a clearly confused expression.

She yelped in surprise. Alexandra quickly slapped her hand over her mouth to silence the scream. Her eyes were wide like a small child who had been caught with their hand in a cookie jar. She had not expected to find a half-naked Rowen in the kitchen, especially when she was half naked herself. Did I mention totally screwed?

“Rowen! I’m so sorry. You scared me. I went out for a run. I needed to try something to help me sleep. I didn’t mean to wake you.” As soon as she said the words, she felt stupid. Of course, she hadn’t woken him if he was already up and standing downstairs. Her cheeks burned. She hated how often she blushed around him. It was as if all she had to do was look at him and her cheeks instantly darkened.

“You didn’t wake me. I was looking for food. I’m hungry. I am always hungry. You ate all the popcorn.” He teased.

“I didn’t eat all the popcorn. You helped.” She said defensively.

Rowen laughed to himself shuffling around in the fridge. She tried to keep her eyes off him. Seeing him shirtless was not going to help her get to sleep.

“Can’t sleep huh? Did you try counting sheep?” Alexandra closed her eyes and nodded her head. She could hear some teasing coming from Rowen. It was as if he had been able to read her mind. Creepy.

“I did actually. It didn’t work only made my wolf agitated. Which is why I decided to go for a run.” Alexandra admitted with a little bit of a grin. At least she knew now that her wolf was still there.

“I know something that usually makes women pass out. I would be happy to help you out…” Rowen was clearly teasing her now. She turned her body, so she was facing him. Choosing to only sleep in his shirt she felt slightly exposed. The shirt was long enough to cover everything though thanks to Rowen’s height, but still. It was the principle.  

“Stop it, don’t be a dick.” She warned before stepping back wanting to put space between Rowen and herself. Her eyes roamed over his bare chest causing her cheeks to burn more. How is he so sexy?

“I am just trying to help. You know because I am a gentleman and all.” He closed the space between them in two steps apparently his hunger for food had been quickly replaced by another type of hunger. His quick movements took her breath away. He was close enough for her to touch now.

“Rowen…” Alexandra found herself struggling to whisper his name out loud.

“Alexandra.” His rough voice matched hers. Years of distance and unsaid words hung between them clinging to them like a wet blanket. The air was suddenly very thick, Alexandra was having a hard time breathing. Her mind was fuzzy all she could hear was her heart pounding behind her ears.

“Kiss me.” She told him once she found her voice. She wasn’t thinking about anything else but him. Years, it had been years since he had claimed her lips as his own. She was tired of fighting her desire to kiss him. She had fought it the whole night. Hell, this was probably just another one of her sexy dreams anyways. There was no way that Rowen, I can have a different girl every night, Blakesley still wanted little Alexandra Shaw. He hadn’t made any type of inappropriate move all night. Why not have a little fun, live vicariously through her active dream imagination?

It was as if that was the only thing Rowen was waiting to hear. The moment she said those words his arms snaked out and pulled her small frame into his own. She felt one of his arms around her waist holding her in place while the other moved to the back of her neck. His lips found hers in a heated passion-filled kiss. There was something urgent in the way his lips moved against hers as if he had been afraid she would change her mind at any moment.

Alexandra never missed a beat, the moment his lips found hers she moved her arms to circle around his neck. She lifted herself up some by standing on her tiptoes. She couldn't believe the spark of energy that flowed between the two of them. Each one moving so in sync with the other. It was as if no time at all had passed between the two ex-lovers.

A tiny part of her mind screamed for her to stop when she felt his hands drop to cup behind her thighs. When he lifted her up, she wrapped her legs around his waist and held onto him ignoring the voice inside her head completely. She wanted this. Dream or not, there was no denying how badly she wanted him. Her teeth scraped across his lower lip this movement caused Rowen's growl to rumble between them. Her fingers tangled at the base of his dark hair, tugging the ends as if she were trying to get closer to him.

Finally, after what felt like ages, she felt Rowen pull back. They both gasped as they tried to catch their breath. Alexandra lifted her eyes to his, his expression clear as the icy blue color they held. He wanted her. Her. She could see the desire rolling off him as clearly as if it had been smoke. Alexandra would be lying if she tried to deny the fact that she wanted him just as much.

When they were younger, they would get to this point and she would stop. She always pulled away. Not because she hadn’t wanted him back then but because her dad had absolutely forbidden her from sleeping with him. He had given her a direct order and it was something she hadn’t been able to break even though she had wanted to more than anything.

Her dad’s order meant nothing now. He was gone and the order had died with him. She didn’t have to stop if she didn’t want to. Rowen looked at her, his eyes asking the question he wouldn’t ask out loud. Alexandra bit down on her lip, then nodded.

“Don’t stop, Rowen...” Alexandra whispered nodding her head to reiterate her answer in case her voice had failed her. She didn't want to stop. Screw her dad's order. Screw her morals. Screw Carter. Screw everything. At that moment she was his. Only his. This had to be a dream because Alexandra was never reckless.

“Alexandra, are you sure?” He mumbled, clearly surprised by her answer.

Alexandra nodded her head once more before she leaned in to kiss him, grateful that he was still holding her up, so it was easy to reach his lips. If she been on the ground that moment wouldn’t have been so smooth. Her arms tightened around his neck and she pulled Rowen in tighter.

“I want you, Rowen.” Alexandra promised in between sweet but still clearly hungry kisses.

“Say it again.” She heard him mumble between her onslaught of kisses.

“I want you, Rowen.” Alexandra whispered. That was all he needed it seemed because once he knew she had made up her mind he moved up the stairs towards his bedroom. He carried her the entire way as if she were as light as a feather. She could feel his biceps and his rock-hard abs through the thin fabric of his shirt she was wearing.