Selflessly

PROLOGUE

Prologue

Good Girl Gone Bad

"Czarina, be a good girl, okay?" Ngumiti sa akin si Daddy.

I smiled to my Dad as well. I nodded. And then he patted the top of my head.

That's what he always told me when he was still living. At bago pa man mangyari iyong aksidente...

When he was gone I still tried my best to be a good girl for him. And for my Mom and Ate Eris.

I've done good in school. I was always an honor student. At halos bahay and school lang din ako palagi gaya ng instructions sa akin ni Mommy. Para hindi na rin siya mag-alala pa sa akin. Especially after Dad's death, si Mommy na lang ang naiwan sa amin. She's already busy in our law firm and managing it. Tapos may mga kaso pa na inaasikaso si Mommy ng clients niya. She's a lawyer. While Dad was a Judge. And I think Mommy was pressured at times too since Dad's passing.

And on Sundays we go to church with my family. Ganoon na ang pamilya namin simula noong kasama pa namin si Daddy. And I also joined the church choir. Minsan ay kumakanta rin ako sa simbahan. Nakita ko kasi noon pa na gusto ni Mommy ang pakikinig sa choir so I tried joining for her. And she would watch me sing with the other choir members when she attends the church mass.

I wanted to do things for my Mom. Para hindi na rin niya gaanong ma miss pa si Daddy.

And Ate Eris blamed me for Daddy's death... At tingin ko ay ganoon din si Mommy, although she wasn't as vocal as Ate Eris.

Since Daddy's passing too my close relationship with Ate Eris became distant...

Hindi na nga rin ako halos kinausap pa ni ate simula noon...

But I still try na mabalik pa rin sa dati iyong relasyon namin. Although mahirap din na kunin muli ang loob ni ate...

And I have a best friend, Janina. We're always together since we were young. And then there's Ethan... Nakasama rin namin siya ni Janine na lumaki. Magkakaibigan lang din kasi ang mga pamilya namin. Especially Janine and Ethan's fathers were a close friend to my Dad as well.

But one day... because of Ethan... my close relationship with Janine went distant as well...

And one day, the good girl Rina gone bad...

I've always tried to be a good girl. To be good to everyone around me especially those who are important to me. I even always put others first before myself...

But one day... One day I got tired of it, too...

Isang masakit na sampal ang natamo ko galing kay Mommy. My head turned to my side. Napahawak na lang ako sa pisngi ko pagkatapos.

"What are you really doing with your life, huh, Czarina?!" Mommy confronted me.

Hindi naman ako agad nakasagot.

I know she already noticed that something's not right with me... And since I graduated without the latin honors like what was expected of me, because my grades dropped...

"How could you let yourself involve with the son of a criminal?! Gusto mo ba talaga akong ipahiya? At bastusin ang Daddy mo? Gusto mo bang bumangon siya ngayon sa hukay para lang pagsabihan ka?"

"Enough, Mommy..." I said quietly. I can't stop myself.

"What?"

Matapang akong nag-angat ng tingin sa kay Mommy. Alam kong galit siya sa akin ngayon. At may takot man ako, but I will tell her now. Ganoon pa rin naman na magagalit din siya sa akin. Kaya mabuti na siguro na ngayon na lang siya magalit para sa lahat. Para isang beses na lang...

"Mommy, I'm pregnant..." I said it straight.

Mommy's eyes widened in shock.

"What..."

Nag-iwas ako ng tingin.

Hindi agad na nakabawi si Mommy. But when she did she held me tightly that it almost hurt me. Niyugyog niya rin ako na para bang may mali na talaga sa akin. "How could you do this, Czarina..." And I saw her tears fall from her eyes.

Nanlaki rin ang mga mata ko habang nakikita si Mommy na nasa ganoong ayos. I've never seen her before breakdown like this. Kahit noong nawala si Daddy, I barely saw her cry. And now... It's my fault.

Umiyak na rin ako sa harapan ni Mommy. "I'm sorry, Mommy..."

After that Mommy decided quickly. Gusto niya na umalis na ako ng bansa sa lalong madaling panahon. She doesn't want me acquainted with the Sevilla...

"You will go abroad, Czarina. Hindi ka na babalik dito hanggang hindi ko sinasabi sa 'yo. Doon ka sa tita mo."

At wala na rin akong nagawa kung 'di ang sumunod na muna. Ano pa ba ang magagawa ko rito...

And on that day I was already in the airport.

Tinatawag na ang flight ko sa announcement. I have to go now. Or else, maiiwan ako ng flight ko ngayon. And Mommy wouldn't like it. Mas lalo lang siyang magagalit sa akin.

Pero parang may pumipigil sa mga paa ko na gumalaw. Napatingin ako sa gate. I should go now, but...

Natigilan ako. My eyes widened a fraction when I saw him arrived. Mukha pa siyang nagmadali talagang pumunta rito para maabutan ako. The sweat on his forehead was visible.

"Kalyx..." I mentioned his name.

I didn't expect him to be here today. I thought he didn't care about me at all...

"Rina!" He loudly called me. And when our eyes locked, he immediately went to me and held my hand right away. "Don't go." He said to me.

While I was shocked of his presence here. And I could not speak yet for a few moments. We looked at each other. "What are you doing here..." I managed to ask him.

Nakatingin siya sa akin. "Please, don't go, Rin..." He gulped and then he licked his lips. He looked troubled. But he managed to say the words to me... "I know that I'm such an asshole. I was bad to you. I... I didn't treat you well... But, please, don't go. Don't leave me... I will beg you to give me another chance... please..." pakiusap niya sa akin.

Tumulo na lang ang luha ko habang tinitingnan at pinapakinggan ko siya ngayon.

How did this happen... when everything between us was only a fake?

And why would he beg me to stay...

Wasn't he in love with someone else?