Unwanted Wife

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

I want to open my eyes as i heard sounds and voices all around me. Pero hindi ko magawang idilat ang aking mata, i want to move my body but it felt numb. I felt so tired, wala akong maramdaman na kahit ano sa 'king katawan, as if I'm not in charge with my own body.

I heard Gray's Voice, Even Keana and Eros are all worried pero bakit? Ano bang nangyari? Until i let the darkness reign on me again.

Hindi ko alam ilang  oras na akong natutulog, I slowly opened my eyes and roamed it around the room, it was all plain white until it darted into the IV that is connected to my hand.

Gusto kong mag salita pero walang ni isang salita na lumalabas sa 'king bibig tila may nakaharang na tubo roon. What happened? Nasaan ba ako? All i can remembered is watching a movie and getting home late at night until i was hit---

Naaksidente ako! My body flew and landed on the hard floor, i remembered getting hit by a car and that car just drove away as if nothing happened. As if it didn't bump into a pregnant lady.

My babies!

Gusto kong sumigaw at humingi ng tulong. May babies are just fine right!? They're just fine right?

Agad na dumako ang mata ko sa bumukas na pinto and a woman whose wearing a nurse uniform came in. And as soon as she saw me ay mabilis din siyang lumabas, it's just a matter of second until she came back with company.

"Mrs. Mendoza, what are you feeling?" The Doctor said. after they took the tube at my mouth.

"B-babies .." that's the first thing that came out of my mouth. My babies. "M-my babies..." As a hot load of tears roll down my face.

The Doctor looks un oriented and shook his head bago bumulong sa nurse na kasama. But I don't care about that, all i care is my babies.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Mendoza but the twins didn't survived the incident."

At iyon ay tila isang bombang sumabog sa 'king mukha, that my babies are gone. Pero baka nasa isang teleserye lang kami malay mo naman joke lang ang lahat nito. O baka nananaginip parin ako dahil baka sa tagal umuwi ni Gray ay nakatulog nanaman ako?

"I'm sorry for your lost..."

"N-no.. n-no m-my babies.."

How can he say that i lost them!? They're just in my tummy playing with each other. Nandito lang ang mga anak ko! Nandito lang sila sa loob ng tiyan ko.

"We need to do an operation since you are 6 months pregnant to get the babies out for you to survive Mrs. Mendoza, and finally after a three long months you are finally awake."

Three months? Did i fell into coma!?

"Please no! T-tell me it's all a lie! Ang mga anak ko! This was just a prank! Hindi pwedeng mawala ang nga anak ko!"

Hindi kona alam ang aking ginawa, kahit hindi kaya ng katawan ko ay sinubukan kong tumayo upang abutin ang doctor. He's just lying! How can he lie on something so important. O sadyang matigas lang ako at hindi ko matanggap na wala na ang mga anak ko dahil sa kapabayaan ko?

"Do it now." The doctor said.

Until i felt something struck into my vein and i can feel my eyesight become blurry again.

"A-ang mga anak ko."

The last words i said before darkness reign into me.

-----

Two weeks simula nang magising ako sa pag kaka Coma, two weeks na nag luluksa mag isa. Blaming myself for every damned decision i had made. Gray never visited me once, it was just my brother who did and my parents. Pero ang asawa ko ay wala.

Maybe he's mad?

He's mad. It should not be a question, Eros told me what happened when I'm asleep for  three months. They held a small funeral for my kids na hindi ko man lang naabutan. My eyes watered again as those words keeps lingering on my mind.

"Umiiyak ka nanaman." Rinig kong wika ng kakambal ko pero hindi ko siya pinansin.

Kahit naman anong iyak ko, kahit na umatungal at mag gulong gulong ako sa sahig ay hindi na babalik sa 'kin ang mga anak ko. Ang sakit! Everything is perfect, they are just completely fine inside my tummy, I'm so excited to held them in my hands pero anong nangyari?

I lost them.

"Si Gray?" Tanong ko.

I missed my husband so much, gusto kong yakapin niya ako sa tuwing umiiyak ako, pasasayahin niya ako sa tuwing nalulungkot ako and that was Gray's attitude he always wants me happy.

Rinig ko ang malalim na pag buntong hininga ni Eros bago ito nag lakad palapit sa 'kin he sat beside a small space on my bed and hold my hands.

"He will be here later this afternoon."

Tila nabuhayan ako ng dugo sa narinig. Gray is coming, pero dahil sa alam kong galit siya ay hindi ko magawang mag saya.

"Peach you can get through this.."

Eros and I? We never had this serious conversation, we always do funny stuff and crazy antics together. Growing up with him it never bores me, kahit na lalaki si Eros ay pipilitin niyang mag laro ng barbie doll para sa 'kin at kahit na babae naman ako ay pipilitin kong mag laro ng baril barilan para sa kanya. Lahat ng kalokohan niya ay alam ko at ganoon rin siya sa 'kin pwera na lamang sa mas lamang siya ng katarantaduhan na ginawa.

We never let each other felt alone. We always got each other's back and I'm thankful that Eros is here trying to comfort me like he always do.

Dahil kung wala akong kasama ay maisipan ko na lang ang mag patiwakal.

"K-kaya ko ba?" Pumiyok kong wika ng mapaluha nanaman ako. "I'm not as strong as you are."

In emotional test siguradong bagsak na kaagad ako. I can't deal with emotions, mukha lang akong malakas pero ang totoo ay napakahina ko.

"Peach malakas ka. You are my twin kahit hindi ko gusto..." He said trying to crack a joke pero bakit hindi ako matawa? Bakit hindi ko magawang bumanat pabalik. As if my laugh box are now empty? sabi ko na nga ba. Dapat talaga tigilan ko na ang panunuod ng SpongeBob. "I know this is hard, i will never know you pain. But you have to get through this."

Kaya ko ba? Can i get through this? I expect too much in this pregnancy and in just an accident i lost my babies. Pati nga yata asawa ko ay nawala.

-----

I woke up feeling a little light as i tried to move my body a little bit.

After a week ay puwede na daw akong umuwi, i waited for my husband to arrive when Eros said that his coming pero ni anino niya ay hindi ko nakita. Therapist after therapist, dahil sa tatlong buwan na pag tulog ko ay nahirapan din mag function ng katawan ko.

Gusto ko man na tawagan si Gray and tell him how sorry i was pero hindi ko iyon magawa. My phone is shattered the day the accident happened gusto ko man na hiramin ang cellphone ni Eros ay ayaw nuya dahil daw hindi pa ako handa.

Saan ba dapat maging handa? All i want is to talk to my husband. I sighed and just closed my eyes hanggang sa marinig ko ang pag bukas at pag sara ng pinto. Maybe it was just my twin again back to annoy the hell out of me.

"Are you awake?"

My eyes automatically opened as i heard his voice. It is Gray!

"Gray..." I said as i look at him, malaki na ang pinayat nito. He even have bags under his eyes and his wearing a very wrinkled clothes. "Bakit ngayon ---"

"I'm not here to console you or to pampered you Peach, I'm just here to hand you this." He said in a hard voice. Iniabot niya sa 'kin ang envelope na dahan dahan kong inabot.

"I'm sorry ..." I said as my eyes watered, the Gray whose funky, funny and sweet is now gone.

"You are sorry?" He said in a mocking tone.

Parang gusto kong lumubog sa kahihiyan sa tono ng kanyang pananalita.

"Hindi ko sinasadya Gray." Wika ko kasabay ang patuloy na pag bagsak ng mga luha ko.

Kung puwede Lang na itaya ko ang buhay ko para sa kanila gagawain ko. I can do anything for my kids pero ano ba ang magagawa ko? It already happened.

"Kung sana sinagot mo ang tawag ko. Kung sana pinaniwalaan mo ako, if you could only listened Peach hindi mang yayari ito."

Kitang kita ko ang galit, sakit at pag kamuhi sa mga mata ni Gray habang sinasabi ang mga katagang iyon at hindi ko siya masisisi kung ako ang satingin niya ang salarin sa pag kawala ng mga anak namin. Even I blame myself for losing them.

"Ang sabi ko pauwi na ako! Ang sabi ko sandali na lang! But you never trusted me! You never listened to me!"

"Gray hindi totoo yan!"

"Bullshit!" Dumadagundong na sigaw niya bago itinaob ang lamesa na nasa gilid"Sana ako na lang! P*tang ina bakit ang mga anak ko pa!? They never get the chance to see this world because of your incompetence! Ayos naman tayo Peach, alam kong mali na iwan ka dahil sa galit ako, and i regretted that! If you could only answered your phone! Kung hindi mo sana pinairal ang pride mo hindi mang yayari ito!"

There is nothing i can say but to accept Gray's hatred towards me. Alam kong napakahirap even I can't accept it.

"I'm sorry ..." I said habang patuloy ang pag bagsak ng luha mula sa 'king mga mata.

"Your sorry will never being my kids back." Malamig na wika niya.

"A-anong gusto mong gawin ko Gray?" Oh hell yes! I can do anything he want mapatawad niya lang ako.

"Sana hindi na lang kita nakilala! Sana hindi na lang kita minahal! I regret knowing you Peach Montefalco! I regret that I choose you over Jessica."

But hearing those words to him made my world collapsed.