My Fake Fiance's Brother

Deal!

"Are you out of your mind? Dropping a bomb like that in the middle of New Year's dinner with my family?" Alex tightens his grip on the wheel as he tries to calm down.

"What would have been the point in lying? Are you so naive to think they won't check everything about me the second they can? Good God, Alex, your father is the biggest sponsor at the hospital I went to have the tests done. It will take him a day!" I snap back, even though I agree I should have discussed it with him before I jumped the gun. It's just... There was that look on David's face. He looked like he recognized me and I... I wanted to shock him... to know if he would even feel bad if I died.

It was selfish. And a bit stupid as after the initial shock and his mother asking for details, my ex's face went back to his cold stone usual.

"I went through a lot of trouble to hide your past before this dinner. Only for you to put it on a plate and serve it to my family. How was that part of the deal?"

"It wasn't. At least not part of the one day payment deal. But if we were to pretend we will be engaged for a year, than it's better they know."

Alex hits the breaks so hard I almost catapult out of the windshield.

"The f**k?!" I grumble.

"So you accept the deal? You're going to marry me?"

"Hold your horses, cowboy. I will be so sick by the end of my life, I will be no better than a vegetable. If we are legally married, you are my next of kin and that means making medical decisions. So absolutely not! But we can be engaged for a year. Wanting to plan a wedding for when I will feel better. Once my sister is settled in college, my treatment will unexpectedly fail and you will be a grieving fiancée that was so distressed, he will never want to marry again. Your parents won't nag you about settling down."

"And you? You just die?"

"Save the pity. I was going to die anyway. With this, I have enough money to make it another year for my sister and to pay for all her college expenses. Also, I want it in writting that after I die, you will take care of her. Not like, she won't have to work, but she will never be homeless or hungry or sick without money for treatment."

"Wait... Ava... That would solve my trouble with my parents and I may be a prick, but... if there is a chance for you to live, I will pay for the treatment. And we can find another reason for our break-up at some point." I am surprised to look at him and see genuine worry in his eyes. I didn't expect him to give more than a f**k. So, out of instinct, I reached out and placed my hand on his.

"There is no treatment that will keep me alive for more than five years. At most. And that will be as a bed-ridden, always in pain, shaking shadow of myself. I would do a lot for Lili, but I am too scared to live like that for years just so I exist somewhere at the periphery of her life."

I didn't realize I started crying or that my eyes were closed until I felt Axel's thumb on my cheek, swiping away a rebellious tear that made it way though all the walls I've built in the last years. I wanted to stop right that second. I promised to myself that no one will see me cry since my mom's funeral and now...

But I can't stop. The dam broke and now the tears are falling out of control.

I have no idea for how long I lost myself, but when the fog lifts over from my brain and I feel like I can breathe again without hurting, Axel's arms are wrapped around me. He gently swings back and front while humming something that sounds like a lullaby. I feel quite pathetic, but I don't pull away. I don't pull away for a long time and for the first time since my diagnosis and maybe even before that I allow myself all the time I need to grieve.

But grieving sucks!

Especially grieving yourself.

So, I turn my head and bury my face in Alex's shoulder, taking in his smell, the expensive perfume, the touch of his skin, the rough material of his tux. Surprised, he leans back a little to look at me.

That is when I kiss him.

Not in a gentle, I just cried on your shoulder, way.

But more like... I really need you to f**k my head empty before it explodes.

"Ava, I don't think..." He musters, through sharp breaths, but all the protests are forgotten once my hand slips into his pants.

He owes me this anyway. I needed this f**k last night and he ruined it.

Who waits until the wedding night anyway?