A second chance

The rejection

My eyes burst open and I wince when the bright light from the sun almost blinds me. I rip my covers off, jump out of bed and run to my closet to find some clothes. I grab a short, grey skirt and a white blouse. I brush my hair quickly and style it in a high ponytail. I look at my reflection in my standing, full length mirror. My pale skin looks even paler today, I have huge, black bags under my eyes, a sign that I barely slept last night, and I have yellow crust in the corner of my eyes. I wrinkle my slightly freckled nose at my reflection and grab some cotton pads. I walk to my bathroom and turn the water on, allowing it to become lukewarm before placing the white, cotton pad underneath. When it’s wet, I wring out the excess water and start washing my eyes. Once done, I put on a light amount of makeup, just to make my emerald eyes pop, and then I walk downstairs to meet my mother.

“Happy birthday my beautiful daughter” mom practically yells as I enter the kitchen. I smile. “Thanks mom” I say and step over to hug her. The small kitchen smells of fresh pancakes and coffee. I turn to the pot with freshly brewed coffee, grab a mug and pour some of the dark, bitter contents into the mug. I blow on the steam a bit, making it cool a bit, and I take a small sip. I close my eyes as the warm liquid slide down my throat, waking me up instantly. A large plate of pancakes is placed in front of me with a small cube of butter, and I smile as it slowly melts down the stack. “How did you sleep?” Mom asks as she starts cutting into her own tower of pancakes. I shrug my shoulders. “About as well as I have the last month. Lizzie has been howling in my mind all night, screaming dirty things to me, and when I’m almost asleep, she wakes me up again. I cut out a small square of the top pancake and stuff it in my mouth. I savour the delicious taste. “You have outdone yourself mom” I say as I swallow. She is a formidable cook. Today is my 18th birthday. At midnight tonight, I will meet my wolf for the first time, and tomorrow I might find my mate. If he’s in this pack, that is. I’ve had a crush on our Alpha for a while now, years actually, but he doesn’t even know I exist. I start daydreaming about his square jaw, chiselled body and blue eyes. “Ahem” I’m brought out of my train of thoughts when my mother clears her throat. I blush. My cheeks become bright red. “Sorry” I say and finish my coffee. I get up and grab our plates before placing them in the sink. I walk back to the old table, kiss my mother and walk to the hallway to get dressed for school. We live about 10 minutes away, and I always walk that way. I inwardly sigh. I hate school. I’ve been bullied for as long as I can remember, and recently it’s become more physical. The twins, Ashton and Amber keep hitting me, and being a red head, I easily bruise. “Bye mom” I yell and open the door. I push it closed and start walking down the gravel to the trail leading to the school. I walk in my own thoughts when I see the school. The familiar red, brick building towering above the tree line with dirty windows and big, black doors. I step away from the trail and walk up the paved entrance to the ugly building and put my hand on the handle, ready to go in, when I’m suddenly yanked back by my hair. I wince in pain as I land on my butt, anger flashing my eyes for a moment before I control myself again. Amber stands above me, snickering to her brother as red blood seeps out from a small cut in my hand. The blond, blue eyed twins look at me. “Oh my goodness. I’m so sorry. I didn’t see you. I thought it was a trash bag” she says as she starts to laugh. I sit still until they have entered the building and then slowly get up. I have learned from experience that I am to sit down before getting up, or she would get a slap and a kick, if they’re in a good mood. If not, I would be practically hospitalised. I sigh and enter the building. I hurry to my locker and grab my history book, before hurrying to class, almost too late. “I’m glad you could join us, miss James” the teacher says as I sit down on my chair. I blush slightly, but says nothing. I open my book to the correct page and start reading like, almost, the rest of the class. I finish the reading and start working on the questions for the chapter, and soon the class is over. I get up from my chair and grab my backpack when someone push me, hard, towards the teachers desk. My thigh slam into the corner, and I cry out in pain as I almost break my leg from the impact. “Watch where you’re going. You almost ran into me” Amber said with a wide grin on her face. The throbbing pain in my leg is almost unbearable, but I won’t let her see that. “Amber, I did see that she didn’t even move. But I will talk to her” our teacher said to Amber before turning to me.

Mr. Adams ended up sending me home, and I had hoped that I would be able to sneak inside, but no. My mother already knew what had happened. Mr. Adams had called her the moment I left school. I had used longer time to walk home than usual, because my thigh were swollen and had a bruise the size of Kansas on it. Limping and exhausted, I hobble up the stairs to the front door before entering the kitchen where my mother was waiting with a tray of freshly baked chocolate chip cupcakes, like always when she wants me to take my time before telling her what I have in mind.

I eat a cupcake as I think about the painful walk home. “Let me see” mom says, bringing me out of my train of thoughts. I sigh and look at her. “It’s not that bad” I lie and try hiding the fact that it hurts like h.ell. “Yeah, right. I am a werewolf you know. I can hear when you’re limping” she says and place her delicately manicured hands in her sides, giving me her famous I-know-you’re-lying look. I sigh and lift my skirt, showing her the black and blue spot on my thigh. Her gasp is enough to make me wince. “Oh my goodness! Who did this to you?” She ask as her green eyes fill with tears. “It doesn’t matter. I can’t do anything about it anyway. They are to high up the rank” I say with my head cast down. Amber and Ashton are the former Alpha James’s kids, and therefore untouchable. I finish my cupcake and jump down from the barstool. I limp out to the hallway and grab my bag before limping to my room to do my homework.

It’s late when I come out of my bedroom, almost 10. It’s only a couple hours before I get my wolf, and I’ve heard her voice in my head a few times already today, but she won’t tell me her name. I allow my hands to glide along the painted walls of the cabin as I enter the kitchen where my mom waits with a white dress. It’s custom for every girl that come of age to wear a white dress, as a symbol of their virtue and the new life springing free from their souls. I smile as I watch the lovely details of the silk, admiring how the pearls make an intricate, elegant appearance down the front, with a low back. I feel tears pressing in my eyes as I take in the dress, feeling my heart swell for my mother’s handiwork. “Oh mom! It’s beautiful” I whisper and step closer to her to admire it further. I recognise the fabric from her own coming-of-age dress, and I smile as I give her a hug. “I love you mom” I whisper in her ear as the tears start falling. How long we stand there, I don’t know, but when we’re done, we both have red eyes and smudged mascara.

I grab the dress and run to the bathroom to shower and then put it on. I apply some light makeup and a pair of ballerina flats before walking back to my mother, that has moved to the living room. “I’m ready” I say and give a quick glance at the clock on the wall. Five minutes left. “Good luck tonight. I would love to come with you, but I can’t. I love you” she says as I step closer and give her a hug. “I know, and I will. I love you too.” I kiss her cheek and step outside. I run to the forest, past the school and to the clearing by the waterfall. The full moon shine bright above me, showing me the path to take. I see Alpha Jackson waiting with a couple from the council, waiting to note down what kind of wolf I will become. I blush as I start removing the dress, and the chilled air make my n.ipples erect. I look up to the moon and close my eyes, feeling how the silver light wash over my naked body. I take a small step away from the dress, still with my eyes closed, and gasp when I feel the first change. The bones in my hands start to break, shift and set again, then my arms, legs and hips. Tears of pain start running down my face, and soon the bones in my back start breaking. I can feel how my fingernails become longe and dark, I feel the burn from where fur starts sprouting from my body, and soon the pain is gone. I open my eyes and see a few from the council staring at me with their jaws practically on the ground. Confused, I look over my body and gasp myself. My fur is white as snow, the colour of the Moon Goddess, a sign that any white wolf is her chosen. I turn around to run deeper into the forest, but stop in my tracks when I smell the masculine scent of sandalwood and caramels. I turn around and see Alpha Jackson with an angry scowl on his face. He steps closer to me and stare at me with an unreadable hatred in his eyes. My heart flutters and my mind is begging him not to reject me, but I know deep down, that he will. “Disgusting” he whispers to me and motion for me to shift back in my human form. I do so, reluctantly, and stand face to, well, chest. He’s so tall. He growls at me, making me tilt my head up, and I see in his eyes his rejection before he open his mouth. “I, Alpha Jackson, reject the, Bella James, as my true Luna of the Silver Fate pack. You will never become my Luna” he said and step away a bit. My knees five out and I fall to the ground, crying and clutching my chest, hoping it’s a cruel joke. I start feeling dizzy, and soon I’m alone, passed out and in pain.

I wake up early the next day. I get up from the cold ground and start walking towards my clothes, before slipping on the dress and walking back to the pack house. I find Alpha Jackson at the breakfast table, and I see him shake his head, undoubtedly not wanting me to do this in public, but I have to do this now. I take a steady breath and look at him.

“I, Bella James, accept your, Alpha Jackson’s, rejection. I release any claim the Moon Goddess might have given us, and know that I will never become Luna of the Silver Fate pack” my heart broke, but I couldn’t let him see it. I had loved him for years, and I was so happy yesterday when I smelled him, but he rejected me the minute he found out, leaving me broken on the ground. It took me all night before I managed to accept his rejection, and then I ran to my car, got in and drove off. I called my mom, and then I looked for a pack that might take me in, hoping for a future far away from heart break.