TWELVE
1474 Words
“I don’t think that is a good idea” Nemesis suddenly walks away and went to the kitchen but I followed her there.
“Why Nemesis? I should know”
“No, you don’t want to know about that” She started to get herself busy to avoid looking at me straight in the eyes. She went towards the refrigerator and she gets a bottle of water.
“Why?”
“I am afraid that you will repeat your mistake twice. Here, grab a drink” she hands me the bottle of water to turn my attention away from the topic. But that will not work right now so I grabbed her hand, just before she walks away again from me.
“You know, Nemesis… the probability that I can make my mistake twice will be higher if I do not know what my mistake is”
“No. I won’t tell you. I will be glad if you don’t remember the whole thing there” she tried to shrug my hold on her but I kept it tight.
“But enough to know that I married her, right?”
“No… it’s not that. It is fake. Now get off the hold on me” she tried to push me but I am tough enough to handle it. She is not yet using her powers to me. Maybe because she cannot think straight right now.
“What, fake?!”
“Thanatos please, don’t dig up to that past. You should dig into your memories about the mission, not that”
“AAAH!” I release my hold on her when I felt the pain in my head. It hurts a lot!
“Thanatos?! Oh no, it is happening again, isn’t it?”
I felt Nemesis holding my both shoulders but I cannot see her clearly right now. I am getting so dizzy again until I knelt down. My head hurts so much!!!
Despite my experience, I always dream that one day, there’ll be a single person who’ll save me from this kind of misery. A person who’s not like my father, or stepfather, or any other people around me. Who’ll see the best in me even if I’m like this. Who’ll love and marry me. Who’ll stay with me and care for me. Who’ll not abandon me when the times get very rough. That’s my only dream, but I died. I can’t have those so I just want to feel it even for a few moments. I want to know how it feels to get married. So please, Thanatos. Please marry me
WHAT IS THAT? I HEARD A VOICE.
Is that… Mara’s voice?
I… I do
Very well said, you may now kiss the bride
What the heck is happening?! My head is hurting so bad and now I am hearing voices!
That’s how you should kiss someone. Now, let’s try it again?
W-what?
Kiss me
Is… this my memory of her?
I want to replace my bad memories here and turn them into good memories, with you
Mara….
Dark, do you like me?
Yes
Oh no…
“*pants* I actually liked her” Those are the words that suddenly burst from my mouth. The headache suddenly stopped and I feel like I carried tons of loads. I am breathless right now.
I looked at Nemesis which is now looking so worried about me. She is still holding both of my shoulders.
“Y-you… you remembered?”
“I remembered some of it. I heard some voices, enough to know that I had feelings for her” I said as a tear falls out of my eyes. Am I crying? Maybe because of my headache? Or… because of Mara?
“That is the reason why I don’t want you to remember those things. You might also remember the feelings that you had with her. Look, she is the reason why you are here right now, why you are being punished. And I don’t want you to make that same mistake again especially now that you are human already. You can easily be tempted”
“Am I still not allowed to fall in love?” I asked her innocently. Suddenly, she slowly loses her hold on me. She started to think...
“Well… probably. You are being punished right now but you are still grim reaper”
“But as you said, I am a human now”
“What do you mean?”
I looked at her straight in the eyes before I let out a big sigh.
“It will be impossible for me not to fall in love. Humans are weak right?”
“Maybe that is your mission? Not to fall in love?”
“I… I don’t know”
“You are being punished because you had feelings for a human soul so maybe your mission here is to not fall in love with anyone?” she seems very confident in what she is saying right now.
“We are not sure about that, Nemesis”
“But there is nothing to lose if you try, right?”
Nothing to lose… the question is DO I HAVE ANYTHING? I don’t have my powers, I don’t have my memories, I don’t have my own house or something. Is there anything that I can lose aside from that? I am just a poor and weak human.
“Yeah, I think so”
“That is why you just need to stay here, Thanatos.”
“What?”
“You won’t be able to fall in love if you won’t be seeing anyone else other than me, right?”
Why do I feel like it is not a good idea? It feels like aside from turning into a human, another punishment for me is to become a prisoner here. I don’t have any freedom.
“I don’t agree with that, Nemesis”
“Thanatos, will you please listen? I know that we still really don’t know what your mission is but… we just have to make sure. They bring me here to look after you and I don’t want you to have another punishment for not accomplishing your mission here”
She looked at me sincerely. I don’t think that my suggestion or feelings here matter right now. It seems like I live, to obey. Even if I don’t agree with it.
I just answered her with a bitter smile and a nod. Then after that, I just went back to my own room.
---A Week Later---
Right now I am just looking at the window staring at the beautiful garden outside. How I wish I can touch those flowers and see the beauty of this place.
It’s been a week since I became a true prisoner of this house. I did not try to escape anymore. It feels like if I dared to do that, another problem will arise. Just like the last time, when I almost got arrested and jailed because of the murder of someone that I don’t even know.
I do not want Nemesis to have another difficulty because of me. I even drag her to this mess that I am having even though I am not aware of it in the first place. I am the one being punished but “The up above” that she was saying gave her another responsibility which is me. She should not be here, but… I can’t do anything.
*beep! beep!*
I came back to my senses when I heard a car horn outside. It is in front of the garden and it is heading somewhere… nearby?
Wait, the car is familiar to me… the red car… that shining red car...
I REMEMBER THAT CAR! THAT IS THE CAR OF THE WOMAN WHO ALMOST HIT ME IN THE ROAD.
I stood up and went closer to the window hoping to see the driver of the car, and I am correct. She is that woman.
She started to move her car when the dog in front of it already passed by. So I guess that is the reason why she is making noises in her car, to send away that dog.
I just looked at her following where she is going and… my eyes widened…
She is parking her car in the garage of a huge house two blocks away from here.
So it means…
She is living in the neighborhood? I might be able to see her often?
My heart starts to pound so fast right now… oh no, why? It is happening again? I felt this before when we first met and now, I just saw her from afar but I am feeling this way for the second time?
I am confused.
Who really is that woman?
Why do I feel this way towards her?
- Writer
