Ripped Away And Apart

Kafli 9.

When I wake up I am feeling refreshed and just better in my body but I am hot. I open my eyes and there is Max cuddling me but he is awake and just looking into thin air. He is not looking at me but I know that he knows I am awake. 

“Who am I to you?” he asks with a distant voice. 

I look up at him but he is not looking at me. 

“My kidnapper” I say simply. 

I feel his body tense up and for some reason I wish I would have said something else but that is the truth and I am not going to lie to him. 

“Then why did you kiss me?” he asks, still not looking at me. 

I sigh and try to move a little away from him but he just holds me in place. 

“Have you heard about stockholm syndrome?” I ask. 

That makes him look at me, he always looks angry but I just meet his gaze because even though I made that mistake before I still think that he will not hurt me. 

“You think this is like that?”

“You kidn*pped me, you won't let me meet anyone else but you, you won't let me leave my room, you almost never talk to me and now when someone touches me after a few weeks of isolation of course my body will react like that” I state to him. 

With every word I could see the wheels spin in his head and I can see that he is thinking about something. After a few minutes he lets me go and stands up from the bed, my body screams for his warmth again but I just sit up in the bed. He looks at me standing by the bed but closes his mouth again, looking firmly at my chest. I lift up an eyebrow and look down of course one of my boobs is hanging out from the dress, I quickly fix it and look at him. 

“If I let you out then you will just try to run, if I give you your stuff back you will just call your family or the cops and leave me. I don't trust you not to do something stupid” 

I rub my eyes and sigh very loudly on purpose. 

“Of course you asshole! I don't know what the hell I am doing here! I was doing fine on that farm and I was finally feeling fine! You kidn*pped me! You took away my freedom and at first I had a little idea for what but now! I have no f*****g clue, what the f**k I am doing here!” I am starting to yell. 

“You are here for me, you are mine” he growls. 

“Oooo believe me, you don't want me, I am damaged goods and I am not someone worth k********g but besides you have a lot of girls here running after you... “ 

“I don't give two shits about them” he interrupts me. 

I get up from the bed and stand in front of him. 

“And you should not give a s**t about me, just let me go home before something happens and let's just forget about this. I will tell my family I had one episode and everything will be fine” I say soothing trying….

He just looks at me but then he takes a step back and really looks at me, I am standing there in just my dress and I feel naked but he has to see them so that he will see I am not worth this. He needs to see me so that he can see that I am not worth this. He keeps looking me up and down but then he just took me into a hug bending down sniffing my hair. With every touch of his skin is a spark that makes me feel better so I hug him back but then he just pushed me away and walked out of my room locking my door. I walk to the full body mirror and look at what he was looking at. I have scars on my arms and legs, I have tiny but I can see them needle puncture wounds from the time they had to sedate me. I have scars on my knuckles from punching and I have a crooked collarbone from when it broke. My jaw then drops when I see the love bites on my neck! He gave me hickeys!

I have a long and difficult mental and medical history, I have been in so many fights that my friends left me because they could not look at me destroy myself. I have tried to end my life a couple of times, I have chosen pain over help because feeling that pain inside for too long is just not worth it. Drugs did not help, I tried almost every illegal drug out there but nothing took the pain away. I just needed to bring it out of me with real pain or just end it all. I moved because I needed other surroundings and my doctor said it might help and especially if I was working all day everyday so that my body is drained of energy. I have not had the pain here, there is nothing here, I have had my head on the fact I was kidn*pped so I have not felt the pain in my heart since then but to be honest I do have a broken rib and I got my period so this stay has not been pain free. I just hope now that he has truly seen me now that he will let me go and just forget about all this because I sure can. I walk over to the window and start to look at the people out there having fun and just being there all carefree, no one looks up at me. Do they know I am here? I know the doc knows I am up here, the older woman knows I am up here, all the people from a week ago know I am here but do they know I am locked up here?

The door unlocks and in walks the older woman with food. 

“Hey sweety” she says smiling. 

I smile at her and she stops in her tracks with an open mouth just staring at me. O f**k I AM STILL IN JUST A DRESS! I quickly look down at myself but I look fine? Just looks like I am wearing a dress there is nothing showing that should not so I look up at her again. She has gathered herself and is putting down the food. I walk over to her and pick a grape up from the plate. 

“Thank you, looks good” 

“O honey I did not make is, alpha did, he makes all your food” 

Well I guess I have to thank him one day then when I meet him. I just nod at her and look at the hamburger and fries with a side of grapes and a chocolate bar.

“I just have to say Luna, you have a beautiful smile” 

“O my name is Ana not Luna” I say smiling at her again now out of joy and trying to hold in laughter. 

The older woman laughs and slaps herself a little on the head making a ding sound and I keep my smile, then she just looks at me with such warmth and love in her eyes. Is she like this with everyone? Then like she realized she left my room and turned around leaving my room and of course locking. I eat almost everything but then I take the grapes, chocolate and the fork with me back to the window. There are about twenty people out there like always all in the gym clothes talking but then all of a sudden four wolves come from the tree line and I gasp. I adjust my glasses on my nose and look directly at them. They are all brown but in their own way two have a little white in them, one just dark brown and another a black spot on his/her hip. They walk into the middle of the grass and two go to the side but two face each other, they are acting strange they are so calm and collective. Then all of a sudden the two facing each other start fighting and the people start cheering! They are biting, scratching and just full on fighting while the other two wolves just watch. I am shocked but I can not take my eyes off this, blood starts to taint the grass but that is not slowing down the wolves. This went on for a little while until finally one of the wolves got a grip on the other's neck pinning him down on the ground. The wolf on the ground stops moving and the other lets it go, the wolf walks to the face of the one on the ground and pushed his nose to his and the other rubbed to him. THEY WERE FIGHTING AND NOW BEING ALL CUTE AND TENTATIVE! They move off the grass so the other two can start, they were a little more aggressive so there is even more blood on the grass but the one with the black on the hip won but he did not go check if his opponent was okay like the other he just walked away. Then everyone started to do some exercise in the field and I just sit there looking at them poking the fork in my face. I have done this since I was a child, poke the fork in my cheek or my nose or just anywhere in my face. I don't know how long into the workout but all of a sudden four girls walk into the field and I know one of them is her. I am wonder if they actually had s*x the other day? That made me really mad but I just shake my head and look back down at the field. Down there the couch is looking at them and I see him yell something at them but I can not hear it. That made them all stop but I can not see their faces because they have their backs to me. She starts to throw her arms around so the couch looks at her again and says something again. The three behind her start looking at each other like they are offended but then all of a sudden the one I know turns around and looks up at my window. We make eye contact and I just wave my fork at her. Her face is angry, it is only missing steam coming from her ears. She and her gang start to leave the field but then I see Max come to the field in different shorts from mine and a T-shirt. She takes a little skip and runs to him but he just grabs her arms before she could hug him and push her away, walking past her.She looks frozen in her steps but then she runs after him and smoothly slips into his arms and goes up on her tippy toes giving him a kiss. The fork bends a little in my hand but I just keep looking, he does not kiss her back but pushes her away right away. She smiles and looks up to me but I just smile and wave at her again with the fork, then I see Max look at me also. I keep my smile and wave at him as well but he does not wave back but I can see him sigh. 

I move out of the windowsill because I have no interest in looking at this anymore, I take out the book the older woman gave me and start to write. She came with my dinner but I am too busy writing that I only look a little up at her, when I finally feel my eyes droop I look up and the room is very dark. I take a shower and then I put on underwear, shorts and a sweatshirt and climb into bed, wishing Max was here with his heat because I am cold. 

“O sweetheart…” 

I wake up to this disgusting voice and every cell in my body goes numb. 

“Your master is past out drunk again so I took his keys and I wanted to thank you for not ratting me out, because you are such a good girl” 

A hand grips my hair and pulls me out of the bed throwing me on the floor, I look up at the blurry figure standing over me but I know who it is. Max’s Dad.