kiss you?
1580 Words
Bella POV
Asher knocked on my door after dinner. I have to admit,I was surprised. I never expected to see him outside my door at this hour of the night.
"Mind taking a walk with me?" He asked.
I looked at him for a second then grabbed my hoodie and followed him outside.
I noticed that something was different about him tonight. I couldn't point at it exactly but it was there.
Maybe it's from the way he carried himself too carefully, like someone holding a full glass of water and trying not to spill it.
Luna noticed that too so she walked quietly inside me without a word.
We went past the rose garden and past the training ground, further than we had gone on our previous walks. I didn't ask where we were going and Asher didn't say either.
Then the trees thinned out and opened up and I stopped walking.
“ This is beautiful.” I found myself saying.
A spring sat in a small clearing, the water still and catching the moonlight. Tree branches hung over it from both sides.
The atmosphere was quiet in a way that felt separate from everything else happening in this pack.
“ It is.” Asher agreed.
"I used to come here when things got loud." He added.
I could understand that. The serenity was on another level, like a quiet space away from the noise of the pack.
We stood there for a while not saying anything, just listening to the water.
"I have good news for you Bella." Asher said when he finally opened his mouth.
I looked at him but he was looking at the water, as if he was avoiding my gaze.
"The rogue situation has been dealt with." He announced.
"Tomorrow Leon will escort you out of the pack and make sure you get to the bordering human town safely." He added.
That should have made me happy. It would have been a week ago. Not any more.
I stared at Asher but he didn't look at me.
"Tomorrow?" I asked and he nodded.
"Why so sudden?" I found myself asking.
"The timing worked out." Asher replied flatly.
I studied his face…his jaw was set just a little too tight plus the way he was looking at everything except me.
He had planned this conversation before we left the pack house.
"Why does it feel like you are sending me away?" I asked.
Asher turned to look at me at last.
"Haven't you always wanted to be free?" He asked.
"You can go live your life however you want and on your own terms." He added.
"That's not what I asked." I said.
"Bella…"
"Why now Asher?" I pressed.
“The blood moon is two days away. The whole pack is on edge and warriors everywhere." I looked at him. "And you want me gone tomorrow?” I asked but Asher said nothing.
"You are sending me away." I concluded.
"I am giving you the freedom you have always craved for." Asher replied quietly but it came out like that's what he wanted to convince himself.
I laughed and the sound came out small and dry.
"Two weeks ago I would have been packed before you finished that sentence." I confessed and I swear something shifted in his eyes.
"And now?" He asked.
I looked at the water and thought about it.
What changed? What actually changed between the time he saved me and this moment?
"Now it feels wrong." I said honestly.
“I don't know why you won't just tell me what is actually going on." I expressed my frustration.
I wanted to throw in that I was still his fated mate only to remember that I'd made it clear that I never wanted and would never acknowledge such a bond.
A moment of silence passed.
"There is so much that doesn't rub me the right way starting from your sudden sickness and those…black veins I saw the other day.
Then there's a way Kiara looks at me when I ask questions and the way Leon said what he said that night." I turned to face him. "Does any of it have something to do with why you want me gone before blood moon night?" I gathered my courage to finally ask.
Asher held my gaze for a long moment and at that moment, I could see it.
I could see right there behind his eyes…whatever he had been carrying alone since before I woke up in this pack.
Then he looked away and that hurt more than I expected.
"Why won't you just tell me?" I said, frustration bleeding into me.
My voice came out smaller than I wanted. "After everything…I thought we…” I trailed, unable to finish the statement because I didn't know what exactly to say.
“You still won't trust me with this one thing." I said,defeated.
"It's not about trust." Asher whispered loud enough for me to hear.
"Then what is it about?" I pressed.
He was quiet for a long time then he turned and looked at me.
At that moment, the Alpha King was completely gone from his face.
He was just a man standing by the water looking at me like he was already making peace with something.
"Some things are mine to carry." He said quietly and honestly, I didn't have an answer for that.
We stood there in silence for a moment. The water moved softly but I could no longer feel that serenity I felt when I saw this place. It felt like that heavy cloud from these past days was hovering above my head.
"Bella." After a moment of silence, Asher called my name and I swear the way it sounded to my ears was heavenly.
I didn't want to acknowledge that but I did anyway and Luna purred.
I turned to look at him, giving him my attention.
Asher hesitated for a second and then…
"Can I kiss you?" He asked .
I stared at him, trying to convince myself that I heard it wrong.
Asher looked back with patience written in his eyes and face.
It looked like he was giving me the right to make the decision and would accept whatever answer I gave.
That's what undid me honestly, not the question but the way he asked it.
It's like I had every right to say no and he would be okay with that.
I took one step toward him and that's the answer he needed.
Asher's hand came up and held my face gently then he kissed me.
Something happened the moment his lips touched mine.
Luna surged forward with a sound I had never heard from her before.
It was a deep satisfied purr that vibrated through every part of me. My vision blurred slightly at the edges and when I blinked I could feel my eyes had changed.
I didn't need anyone to tell me that they had turned golden, the way a wolf's eyes go when something pulls at the deepest part of them.
Asher pulled back slightly and I realised that his eyes had changed too.
They looked darker, a sign that his wolf had resurfaced too
We stared at each other, breathing hard and ragged.
Neither of us said anything for a moment.
Then his eyes slowly returned to normal and mine did too.
He dropped his hand from my face slowly.
"Why does it feel like you are saying goodbye to me?" I asked. Something was tightening inside my chest that I couldn't shake. Luna had gone completely quiet inside my head which somehow made it worse.
Asher tried to smile but he failed terribly.
"You are leaving tomorrow." He said. "I just wanted to know how it would feel to kiss my fated mate."
I looked at him and made it known to him that I didn't buy that for a single second.
Something about the way his lips had trembled against mine was enough to stir something inside me.
That was not a curious man stealing a kiss.
That was a man saying goodbye and hoping I wouldn't notice.
"Can I stay until the blood moon passes?" I asked.
Asher shook his head almost immediately.
"Everything about your departure is already arranged." He said. "We can't wait any longer."
"Why not?"
"Bella…"
"Give me one real reason." I said.
“ Don't tell me about rogues or preparations made. I just need one real reason why I have to leave tomorrow specifically." I pressed.
Asher looked at me for a long moment and said nothing.
That silence told me everything his words wouldn't.
"Asher." I called , my voice coming out quieter than I intended. "Whatever is happening to you. Whatever those black veins are and whatever the blood moon has to do with it." I held his gaze. "You don't have to carry it alone."
Something moved across his face. It was quick and… painful and gone before I could name it.
"Get some rest tonight." He said quietly. "Leon will come for you after breakfast."
He turned and walked back toward the pack house and I? I stood at the edge of the spring and watched him go.
Luna pressed close but said nothing.
I stood there knowing with everything in me that if I left tomorrow something would break that could not be fixed.
I just didn't know yet if I was brave enough to stay.
- Writer
