12. YOU'RE GOING TO BE A GREAT FATHER
2006 Words
Logan was still wrapping his head around the fact that he was going to be a father. He was not sure if he was ready or if he will ever be.
His life as a big brother didn't seem to be enough to convince him that he will be able to raise his child. He never got along with Kaden and he convinced himself that it was because he never did anything good when it came to him.
Was it going to be a boy or a girl? What would the baby be like? Would he be able to fulfil his duty as a father or would he be like his own father who never bothered to be there when Logan was growing up?
All those questions kept running through his head and he didn't know how to shut them out. He didn't know if he even wanted to shut them out.
He didn't doubt for a second that Tiara would be a great mother because ever since he had known her, she's been nothing but great.
She knows how to take care of her family and she was good at it. She lacked nothing when it came to her duties. A wife, a daughter-in-law and a sister-in-law, she did everything right. Everything she did was perfect and it suits her.
As for him, he didn't know what to do and he felt helpless because he didn't want to fail his child. He wanted to be better than his father but he didn't know what he could do to make sure he never fails him or her.
"What are you doing here? I've been looking for you. I wanted to tell you the good news that mother told me today." Tiara said as she joined him on the couch. "What happened?"
"Nothing darlin', I'm fine. Why don't you tell me what you wanted to tell me?"
"I called my mother to tell her about my pregnancy, she is happy for us. She told me we are going to have a baby boy because both our families have always had a son as a firstborn. I'm sure he will look like his father, I would be happy if he did." She smiled at him and placed her head in his chest. "I'm so happy Logan."
"Can I ask you something, my love?" She nodded her head and Logan continued, "Do you think I'll be a good father?"
"Why would you even ask something like that? You are going to be a great father. Our son will be blessed to have a father like you, just like I'm blessed to have a husband like you." She cupped his cheeks. "You should never doubt yourself."
"I can't help but feel like I would fail him somehow. I don't know what it's like to have a father that cares for you and that is making me nervous. I don't know how I'll behave around my son."
"I have never been a mother but I know I will love our son the way a mother should love her son and I know you will love our son the way a father should love his son. There is no need for you to get worried. We are together in this, whatever happens in future, we will face the problem together as a couple. I know it's not going to be easy but we will be together all the way."
"I don't know what I would be without you. You always know what to say to me whenever I become like this. You understand me." Logan kissed her hair.
"Who could understand you better than I do? I'm your wife after all." She stood up and offered her hand to him. "Come with me, I made you something to eat." He took her hand in his and they both left and went to the kitchen.
"You know, before I got pregnant I was worried that I won't be a good mother. I kept thinking about it every day but since I became pregnant I look at my belly and realise I would do anything for him.
"I will protect him from anything and I would love him unconditionally. I asked myself after making those promises if that's not what a good mother does for her kids then what is a good mother?
"I then realised I don't have to worry myself. You should ask yourself those questions and if your answer is the same as mine, you'll do just great.
"I know I can talk to you and convince you that you're going to be a great father but if you can see it for yourself, you'll believe it.
"You've done good in being a big brother and that too should be able to tell you what kind of father you will be. You are protective of your family, you want to see them smile every day and that says a lot about you."
Logan looked at his wife as she spoke, she was talking so randomly like what she was saying was not that important. She continued dishing up food for both of them.
"I haven't done much in the big brother department. I have lost count at how many times I've tried to talk some sense into Kaden."
"You should stop blaming yourself for that. Your little brother is a lost course, no matter what you do, he will always be full of hatred.
"I remember the very first day I came to this kingdom, I had told his father that I wasn't going to marry him.
"I told them that it was you I was going to marry and I will never forget the hatred I saw in his eyes as I spoke your name.
"I had to ask myself if you two are really brothers because I don't think a brother could have such hate for his brother.
"You share the same blood with him, you may not share the same mother but you share the same father and that makes you family.
"He chose to be like that so you should never blame yourself for it." She stopped what she was doing and looked at him.
"You did everything you could to have a relationship with your siblings even though you weren't supposed to do it all alone but you did and Clayton and Malia are a proof that you did your best.
"Leave Kaden to swim in his hatred and stop blaming yourself. I don't want my husband carrying guilt for no reason."
Logan smiled at her and she did the same. "I will stop blaming myself. Have I ever told you how hot you look when you're serious? It always gives me these dirty thoughts."
She playfully slapped his shoulder. "Stop it. I am being serious here."
"I know and that makes you even sexier. Can we just forget about lunch?" He smiled at her.
"And what would we do if we skip lunch? I don't want to leave my food for nothing." She smiled at him too, trying her best to keep her smile as seductive as possible.
"Why don't we go to our bedroom first and then I can show you? I can be very practical if I want to." He took both their food and put them aside and offered his hand to her.
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"You didn't have lunch and I wanted to be a darling and prepare dinner. I wasn't hungry and neither was mom but I figured you could be. After all, you've in your room for more than five hours." Malia said to Logan and Tiara as they joined her in the kitchen.
"You cooked?" Tiara asked her sister-in-law surprised, she has never seen her cooking before.
"No, it's Arianna who cooked. Of course, I cooked, I can cook too. It's just that I'm not fond of it so you should consider yourself lucky."
"Thank you, sister-in-law, I feel lucky already." She smiled at her as she went to sit. "Could you be a darling again and dish up for me?"
"Of course. I thought you would never ask."
"I still can't believe you cooked! Are you sure we're not going to spend the night in a hospital today?" Logan asked his sister.
"What do you take me for? I would never do that, maybe to you I would but Tiara, no! She is carrying my nephew, I wouldn't dare put them both in danger."
"That's comforting. I guess I should take your word for it."
"Arianna wanted to join us but Clay is busy with something so she didn't want to leave him. I swear that girl will never spend a few hours without Clayton." Malia said as she put the food on the table.
"That's true. I remember the time you took us to the mall for shopping, she wanted to come back after an hour there." Tiara wanted to ask her why they had to come back so early but decided against it.
"She's pregnant, sometimes pregnant women want to be around their loved ones. It's normal for Arianna to want to be around Clay every second, I don't blame her." Gail said as she sat down and joined them.
"When I was pregnant I wanted to be around Kelvin all day long but I knew it was not possible. We were not together anymore and I was just a maid, he had a wife, his queen, I couldn't compete with that.
"Arianna has Clay, she should enjoy herself. The most painful thing a pregnant woman could suffer is not being able to get what you crave for while pregnant."
Logan looked at his mother and then at his wife, he would be there for his wife all the time. He will make sure she doesn't lack anything.
With their baby on the way, he doesn't want to fail either of them. He asked himself all those questions Tiara asked him to ask hi self and he got the answers he was looking for.
He would do anything for his son and if that didn't make him a good father then he didn't know what would.
He knew there would be problems along the way since he had no idea how a good father should be but he was willing to learn and fix all of them.
Tiara and their unborn son are everything to him, his world and he would be a fool not to protect them and give them all the best things the world has to offer.
He looked at her again and when she saw that he was looking at her, she smiled at him. That smile always brought a smile to his face too.
He couldn't believe he was married to her. Tiara should be married to a crowned prince of some rich kingdom, not him.
As much as he wanted to stop thinking about that he couldn't, he would find himself asking no one in particular what he had done to be blessed with such a beautiful wife.
He knew he wasn't just lucky, he was blessed.
He didn't even do anything to win her heart, she willingly gave her heart to him without him even trying. There was no courtship between them but they got married anyway and fell in love with each other.
Their marriage wasn't like any other marriage, it was different.
"What are thinking about?" His wife looked at him.
"Nothing to worry yourself about. Are you okay? Do you need something?"
"I'm okay, I just thought something was wrong with you, you were deep in thoughts."
"It's nothing darlin', I was just thinking, nothing important though."
She smiled at him and went back to her food but Logan knew that she didn't believe him. He wasn't going to tell her that he thought she deserved someone better than him though.
She hates that and Logan knows that too.
He also went back to his food and tried to stop himself from thinking too much again.
- Writer
