Diary
1228 Words
February 5th 2015
Dear Diary
I know I said that I would write in you everyday but life is just so daunting and different right now extremely ,chaotic and busy as well, more than I expected.. I've moved into my dormitory at Stanford and met my roommate (well roommate for now at any rate, it's not like I'll be staying here permanently if I successfully pledge) She's a little hard to read at the moment, but then wouldn't you be if you were sleeping in the same room as a complete stranger. It's such a new experience for me so I presume it is for her as well. Maybe she's just shy or something.
My roommate's also a little standoffish if I'm being honest., Sandy is very quiet and seems relatively nice though. She's offered to show me around the campus. I was surprised to find that she's a senior but due to a shortage of rooms they had to put me with her, apparently there was a scheduling or room roster mishap or something. I don't care though. At least I don't have a horrible roommate, that would have been awful and awkward.Or at least so far it seems like she isn't. I guess time will tell if I've accidentally assumed something that might not turn out to be true at all. I just want to be her friend, it's a little lonely without the ones I had in my small town. Maybe I should have gone to the same one as one of them? At least then I would know someone familiar to me. Have someone to go out and drink coffee with and just chat.
The campus is so huge. I easily managed to get myselft lost and if Sandy hadn't offered to show me around I probably would never have been able to find any of my classes. Sure I had a map but it's a lot easier to find and navigate when a real person shows you the ins and outs. Especially if they show you shortcuts. She's also promised to introduce me to some friends of hers and you'll never believe it! I mean honestly, it was like god watching out for me from above, such luck that I never envisioned or hoped for. Like what are the odds?
Sandy is planning to pledge Kappa Kappa Gamma too! I know what you're thinking, that a senior should already be in a sorority but Sandy is a transfer student so she will need to pledge like everyone else. How cool is that? It's almost like fate meant for us to be roommates, that we were meant to end up in the same room with each other. I might be reading too much into it but it's a nice thought isn't it? Besides it makes me a little less anxious knowing that at least I'll know one person there. Even if it looks like she doesn't like me very much or like it that I 'm going to pledge as well.
I officially start all of my classes next week which gives me time to settle in and sort myself out. It also means that I can work at my new job as well and earn some much needed cash. I'm so nervous though. I start work tomorrow and I'm scared that I'll stuff everything up. I just have to remember that I can do anything I put my mind to, all I need to do is learn and try and everything will fall into place.Or I'll be so completely terrible that all I can do is laugh it off and try and do better the next time. That is if they don't fire me. I really need the money to pay off book fees and other small necessities. IDo you know how humiliating it would be if I had to ask dad for money to pay for feminine hygiene products? He still gets embarrassed by the sheer mention of tampons and pads. The burden of being a woman and all of the sucky stuff that comes with it.
I'm also going to check out some more sororities as a backup plan but I have my heart set only on the one. I'll hate having to be in a different one and I'll be embarrassed if they don't accept me. If that happens I don't know what I'll do. I'll work it out. Life sure is complicated so etimes, isn't it Diary? We never know what's going to happen or what's going to come in the next minute, hour or day. It's what makes life so exciting, that the unknown can happen at any time, without you least suspecting it. I walked by the sorority house today and it's massive, like a mansion on campus massive. They must have a lot of sorority sisters to accomodate in order to have such a huge house. Just goes to show how popular they are and how well respected as well. Every girl I've come across is desperate to pledge, some doing the same as me and not wanting to pledge others because it has to be this one and none other. I can't tell if I'm being too stubborn though. It's possible that a lot of the other ones are just as nice. It's just that I so badly want to be in the same one as my mother. It just means a lot to me that's all.
I've also heard that their parties can get pretty wild and noisy. It's something I am looking forward to, since theres not much call for that in the small town. I bet it's exciting and that there would be lots of fraternity guys there. They have one in a few weeks and by then I will have pledged. How cool would it be if I got to go! Heck some of the fraternity guys I've seen are extremely good looking. Like model good looking. What if they think I'm plain? What if I'm not pretty enough for them and they ignore me? I would die of embarrassment if that happened, no lie. I came here to have a good time and learn. To meet a guy and have my first kiss and maybe even something else that I've kept because it's so important to me to only give it to someone who has my heart completely and whom I trust wholeheartedly. It might seem like a stupid concept, extremely old fashioned and outdated but it's my choice and one I won't change for any guy who just wants to get into my pants. I don't want to push myself into anything I might regret later on down the track.
I've heard that the leader of the sorority or head girl or whatever you call them is a bit mean. But until I actually find out myself I'll keep back my judgement. For all I know it could just be gossip spread by girls who are bitter they didn't make it in. After all it would be something to be upset about, wouldn't it? Let's hope I don't become one of them. Or at least be accepted and not have to be like them.
I'll write in you some more later diary.I want to keep track of all the exciting and new things that happen this year.
Love Misty
- Writer
