Shadows of Orange

Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Lanie, Lexie, and J used their sense of smell to follow Rain’s scent, and eventually found her at the edge of the forest by the Golden Moon pack’s stream, which was also the border to the territory. They expected her to be sulking, but they found her in her tiger form, lying in the stream.

“What is she doing?” J asked.

“Cooling off, I think?” Lanie replied. They continued walking toward Rain, and she happened to hear them approaching. She stood up, shook off the water, huffed, and walked away.

“Rain, wait!” Lexie shouted. Rain stopped in her tracks and turned around. “We just want to talk.” Rain huffed again, but nodded her head.

“Can you turn back?” Lanie asked, but Rain scowled at them and lay back down in the stream, turning her head to the side.

“I’m going to take that as a ‘no,’” J said.

“Yeah, no sh*t,” Lanie spat. They slowly approached Rain, who hadn’t given them a second glance. “Rain, I wanted to apologize on Ryker’s behalf. He’s not—” Rain growled at the mention of Ryker’s name.

“We’re not defending him, we promise,” Lexie said. “We gave him an earful. We all did.”

“And by all, she means even our mates,” J added.

“Ryker’s way of thinking is old and archaic, as Chad put it,” Lanie explained. “But he means well. Yeah, the way he went about it could have been better. But he cares about you and your species. I think that’s why he is the way he is,” Lanie continued. Rain scowled again. “Ah, crap,” Lanie sighed.

“Rain, Ryker isn’t perfect, but you also can’t blame him for wanting to preserve your species that has been nearly wiped out. As an Alpha weretiger, it’s in his nature to care about important things such as that. Yes, you should be his priority, but he’s also a lot older,” Lexie tried to smooth out.

“It’s not an excuse we’re trying to make for him, but you also can’t hold it against him. He only wants what’s best for you guys. Yes, his way of handling the topic should have been done with more finesse, I think that’s the word,” Lanie looked at Lexie for confirmation, and Lexie nodded. “But you know that didn’t come from a place of malice.”

“Ryker lost over two decades of his life in captivity, just like we did,” J said as she pointed between the three of them. “He didn’t believe that he would be able to contribute to his species anymore. But now that he can, he’s trying to be there for you and other weretigers.” Rain huffed again and lowered her head into the water, only to where her nose was above the surface so she could breathe.

“We understand that you’re hurt, Rain, but we won’t be able to understand why unless you change back and talk to us,” Lexie said, trying to convince Rain. Rain closed her eyes and thought about what they were saying. Eventually, she lifted her head, got out of the water, and changed back into her human form. She picked up her clothes and got dressed.

“I’m not mad about what he said,” Rain eventually said in a low whisper. “I’m hurt. He made it seem like that’s all he cared about and that my feelings weren’t important.”

“We know. That’s why we got mad at him. He doesn’t know how to handle women,” Lanie stated. “He’s old-fashioned that way.”

“I also think it’s because he’s never had a mate before. He told us that tigers are polygamous animals, and I believe that having one mate is unusual for him,” Lexie said.

“If anyone can understand his reservations, it’s me,” J said. “I accepted Maverick as my mate, but we haven’t marked each other or mated yet. And it’s because I’m scared.”

“Why?” Rain asked.

“Because of what happened to me after I became of age.” Rain furrowed her brows, and J explained her past in great detail to Rain. Rain was mortified. Although Lanie and Lexie had heard the story multiple times by then, it still saddened them to listen to it again. “That’s why Mav is patient with me. He’s trying to see it from my point of view, and I think you should do that for Ryker. He knows what you’ve been through as a victim of trafficking. That, I think, we can all relate to. Yes?” J asked them. They all nodded in agreement.

“It’s not that I don’t understand where he’s coming from. I want our species to thrive again, too. But it’s the fact that he wants to be the one to do it. He wants to father multiple cubs and do things the old-fashioned way. He’s not the only male out there. That wouldn't make sense,” Rain retorted.

“But how can you know that for sure?” Lanie asked.

“Because there’s never been a definitive number when it comes to the ratio of males to females. Yes, our numbers are astronomically low, and if we aren’t careful, weretigers will cease to exist. I don’t want that. But that doesn’t mean I want my mate to be a man-w***e, either,” Rain replied, brought her knees to her chest, and buried her face. Lanie, Lexie, and J looked at one another, unsure of how to comfort her.

They put themselves in her position, and none of them liked what they saw. They wouldn’t want their mates being with other females either, to increase their numbers, even though there wasn’t any shortage of werewolves in the world.

“Rain, I think you should have a serious talk with Ryker about this. If it truly bothers you, then maybe you guys shouldn’t be together,” Lanie suggested.

“What!?” Rain shouted.

I’m serious. Werewolves reject each other for many reasons, and something like this might be one of them. Cheating is not okay. And if you genuinely believe that Ryker cares more about the future of your species than your feelings, then I think you should step away from his life. You can still stay here in the pack. You're always welcome here, but maybe you and Ryker aren’t meant to be.” Rain nodded, understanding what Lanie was saying.

“It’s not that I don’t want to be with him. The tiger in me knows he’s right, and that this is how our species lives, but the human in me doesn’t want to share him with anyone else,” Rain said, completely defeated.

“Then tell him that. You can’t just get mad and run away from him without telling him how you truly feel,” Lexie said.

“That’s not how mates work,” J added to Lexie’s statement. “I might not be the best person to say that, but Mav and I talk about it a lot. He gives me a lot of, um, what’s it called?” J looked at Lanie and Lexie for help. “What’s that word when someone makes you feel better by telling you it’s all going to be okay?”

“Reassure?” Lanie asked.

“Yeah, that! Mav reassures me a lot. And that’s why we can still be mates without having completed the mate bond yet. We’re still getting to know each other, and I’m still healing from my traumas. Mav is there by my side the entire time. That’s how I know I can trust him. I think you should take the time to get to know Ryker, and he gets to know you, so you can both understand each other better.” Lanie and Lexie were pleasantly surprised by J’s maturity. They were also proud that she was making progress, even though her internal wounds were still very fresh. Rain sighed heavily, unsure of what choice to make.

“We’re not saying you have to do it now,” Lanie soothed her. “Take the time you need to be alone and think things over. But don’t be too harsh on him, especially if you can say that you understand his point of view.”

“Lanie’s right. You can’t be mad if you say you understand,” Lexie inserted.

“If anything, that should be the reason why you talk to him on a deeper level. You both want the same thing for your species, but do you guys want the same thing for each other and yourselves?” J asked.

“I honestly don’t know,” Rain replied.

“Then take this alone to think about it. What do you really want for yourself? What do you want for Ryker? What do you want for your species?” Lanie advised. “Chad’s always telling me, you can’t have your cake and eat it, too.”

“What does that mean?” J asked.

“It means not everything will always go your way just because you want it to. There are things you’re going to have to compromise, especially in a relationship. And that’s any relationship,” Lanie explained.

“We also have a saying in Khmer that’s similar to that,” Rain replied with a curt smile.

“I think every language has a saying along those lines,” Lexie responded, and they all nodded. They sat in silence for a moment, and Rain absorbed everything the girls had told her. After a moment of reflection, she nodded her head.

“I’ll think about it,” Rain eventually said.

“That’s all we ask,” Lanie smiled. She, Lexie, and J left Rain to her thoughts. “Oh, and before I forget, the kitchen staff was able to make that hot pot dish you asked for. So, whenever you’re hungry, come back to the packhouse and eat some.”

“Or, if you’re hungry now, you can think things over while eating,” Lexie suggested. Just as she said that, Rain’s stomach suddenly growled, and the girls couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“It looks like your stomach is telling you to eat first,” J giggled.

“Yeah, I guess I could use something comforting while making a decision,” Rain replied and stood up. “Thank you. I appreciate you girls comforting me,” Rain expressed her gratitude.

“Of course. You’re a part of this pack now. And we girls have to stick together, yeah?” Lanie responded and smiled. They all nodded and walked back to the packhouse together.

Rain ended up teaching the girls how to eat her favorite dish, and to say that they also enjoyed it would be an understatement. At first, many pack members were turned off by the smell of the herbs and spices used, but once they had a taste, many of them expressed their liking for it and hoped it would become a regular dish on their menu.

At first, the kitchen staff was worried because the herbs and spices were hard to come by, but Svetlana was able to come through for them. Many of the ingredients were also spices she used in potions and spells, so she had plenty to share with the pack for hot pot. After they all ate, Rain decided that she would take the day to be by herself and truly determine if she wanted to speak with Ryker about the lack of integrity in their bond.