Disguised Before The Alpha Prince

Chp 27

Pearl

Demyan was ignoring me, and I had no idea why. His silence wasn't just cold—it was cutting. I had tried to convince myself it was nothing, that maybe he was just busy, but deep down, I knew better. Something had shifted.

I held the stack of books close to my chest, a poor shield against the storm swirling inside me. At least the wound on my side was healing—a small relief in the chaos of everything else. Rowan, on the other hand, was treating me differently. He no longer clapped me on the back or teased me like before. His touches were careful, as if he feared breaking me.

Why was everyone acting like I was made of glass?

As I made my way past the academy's courtyard, my eyes caught sight of Demyan. He was sitting beneath a large tree, legs stretched out, his back resting against the bark. A book lay open in his hands, but his eyes weren’t moving—he wasn’t reading. The pipe rested between his lips, a thin curl of smoke drifting lazily into the air.

He looked breathtaking. The setting sun bathed his skin in warm light, and the shadows played across the sharp angles of his face. His sleeves were rolled to his elbows, revealing strong forearms and prominent veins that made my heart skip in betrayal.

What was this feeling?

I hated how easily he made me forget who I was pretending to be.

I approached cautiously, every step heavy with uncertainty. He didn’t look up until I was close, and when our eyes met, something in his gaze made my chest ache. It wasn’t anger—it was distance, a cold indifference that hurt more than fury ever could.

I sat down beside him, leaving a careful space between us. The silence stretched thick and uncomfortable. He puffed at his pipe without a word.

“Are you angry with me… because I went missing?” I asked softly, eyes focused on the grass beneath us. My voice cracked despite me trying to sound casual.

Still, he didn’t respond.

“Demyan…” I pressed, frustration and fear blooming in my chest. “Please, talk to me.”

He finally turned toward me, but his face was unreadable. “I’m not angry with you, Perin,” he said in a quiet, detached voice. “I just need some time to… process everything. So until then—please, stay away from me.”

And then he stood. Just like that. No further explanation.

I stared after him, frozen, a hundred unspoken words caught in my throat.

Process everything?

Did he… know?

My heart pounded as I tried to make sense of it. Was it the night we shared a bed? Had he seen something? Felt something?

Tears stung the backs of my eyes, but I refused to let them fall.

The ache in my chest tightened as I watched Demyan walk away without a second glance.

Stay away from me.

His words echoed louder than any shout, slicing through me like the sharp edge of a blade. I bit down hard on my lip, trying to keep the tears at bay, but my vision blurred anyway. The books in my arms felt heavier, like they were pressing into the bruises I kept hidden inside and out.

I turned and hurried toward the empty corridor, away from the courtyard, away from the stares, and most of all—away from him. My steps grew quicker until I was practically running. I didn’t stop until I reached the end of the garden path, hidden behind a thick cluster of trees near the storage hall.

There, out of breath, I leaned against the stone wall and let the tears fall. I wasn’t supposed to feel like this. I had come here with a mission, not to lose my heart to someone who might never see me as anything but a lie.

What if he knows?

That thought scared me more than anything.

“Perin?”

I flinched, quickly wiping at my cheeks with my sleeves as I turned. Rowan stood a few steps away, a small frown creasing his brows.

“Are you okay?” he asked gently, approaching like someone walking up to a startled deer.

“I’m fine,” I said too quickly. My voice cracked. It betrayed me.

He didn’t believe me, of course.

“You’re clearly not,” he said quietly. “But it’s alright. You don’t have to talk about it. Just… come sit.”

I hesitated. But Rowan didn’t push. He simply sat down on the bench nearby and waited.

After a moment, I followed, collapsing beside him, my hands still clutching the books like they were the last pieces holding me together.

He didn’t ask what happened. He didn’t try to pry.

Instead, he said softly, “Sometimes… people don’t know how to handle their own emotions. So they push others away.”

I glanced at him sharply. Was he talking about Demyan?

Or did he know more than he let on?

“I’m used to it,” I said in a whisper. “People… leaving.”

Rowan was silent for a while. Then he said, “You shouldn’t have to be.”

I looked at him, startled by the warmth in his voice. He was staring ahead, not at me.

He’s different. Demyan's fire burned hot, dangerous and consuming. Rowan… he was steady. Gentle in ways I hadn’t expected. He didn’t make my heart race like wildfire—but he made me feel like I could breathe again.

“I won’t leave,” he added, voice barely audible.

I lowered my gaze, heart full of too many things. Gratitude. Confusion. Guilt. But also… something that felt a lot like comfort.

*____*----*_____*

Demyan – POV

I knew I was being cold. I knew the way I brushed past him—Perin—would leave a mark, but I couldn’t help it.

Everything felt like a lie.

His voice, soft and uncertain, followed me as I walked away.

“Demyan, wait… I didn’t mean to upset you—”

I didn’t turn. I didn’t slow down. I couldn’t.

My fists clenched at my sides, the memory of that girl—Pearl—flashing in my mind. Her eyes, the same shade of Perin’s. Her voice, just a little gentler. But everything about her felt… familiar.

Too familiar.

I gritted my teeth. This was madness.

Perin was a boy. He had to be. He was in the academy. He trained with us, lived with us. And yet—

Why did my instincts scream otherwise?

“Demyan!” he called again, voice slightly breathless from trying to catch up.

I stopped for a moment. Damn it.

He stood a few steps behind me now, books hugged tightly to his chest, his brows furrowed, lips parted as if trying to find the right words.

“I don’t know what I did to make you angry, but please just tell me. I’ll fix it.” His voice trembled slightly.

I looked at him—really looked—and something twisted painfully inside me. I hated the confusion in his eyes. The vulnerability. The way my heart reacted like a traitor.

No… stop this. Get it together, Demyan.

“I have nothing to say,” I said flatly. “Go back.”

His face fell, and for a second, I wanted to take the words back. But I turned and walked away before I could.

I needed air.

I needed distance from him… from myself.

From this chaos I couldn’t understand.

I paced the edge of the academy courtyard, my thoughts unraveling with every step.

If Perin is really Pearl… why hide it? Why come here?

And why does it matter so much to me?

My hands had held her waist. My heart had—

“Demyan,” Karl’s voice cut through my thoughts as he approached from the east wing.

“Not now,” I muttered, brushing past him.

But he followed. “You’re losing yourself.”

“I know,” I snapped.

He stayed quiet after that, like a shadow at my back.

And then, across the courtyard, I saw them—Perin and Rowan.

Sitting on the garden bench. Too close.

Rowan was speaking softly, leaning in slightly. And Perin—he looked calmer. Like the tension in his shoulders had melted. Like he trusted Rowan.

Something dark curled in my chest. Jealousy?

No.

No, it wasn’t that.

It was betrayal. Confusion. A storm I couldn’t name.

I turned away before I could feel more.

If I let myself look too long… I was afraid I’d break apart.

Rowan looked at me while he placed his hand on Perin’s shoulder, I clenched my fist when he did that. Why was I getting angry? Perin is just a weak boy and why am I getting annoyed when Rowan placed his hand on his shoulder. What the moon curse is wrong with me!!!. I shouldn't react this way. I moved from that placed and walked towards the lake that was the only place i could get my mind off this.