Disguised Before The Alpha Prince

Chp 48

Pearl POV

The rain hit my skin like needles, soaking through my cloak and chilling me to the bone. I pulled the fabric tighter, but it did nothing to stop the trembling. My boots squelched in the mud as I hurried down the shadowed path from where I’d met Cecil.

I should have stayed.

The sky split open with a blinding flash, followed by a deafening roar of thunder. I froze in place, heart hammering. My breath caught in my throat as another lightning strike illuminated the trees around me. It was happening again.

The storm, the thunder… it was the same. The same as that night.

My legs gave out, and I sank to the wet ground, gripping the grass as if it would anchor me to the present. But I wasn’t here anymore. Not really. I was back there.

I could still hear the screams.

My mother’s voice crying out.

My father yelled my name.

The heavy thud of bodies hitting the floor.

The smell of blood mixing with rain.

The way the air had felt thick like it does now.

I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping it would go away.

“Stop,” I whispered to no one. “Please, stop...”

My chest burned. I couldn’t breathe right. It hurt.The storm howled louder, echoing my panic. My heart was slamming against my ribs so hard I thought it might break.

“I’m not there,” I told myself. “I’m not… there... I’m not that little girl anymore...”

But I didn’t believe it.

Tears spilled down my cheeks, warm against the cold rain. I pressed my forehead to my knees and wrapped my arms around myself, trying to keep from falling apart completely. Then—

“Perin!”

My head jerked up.

That voice.

My heart leapt to my throat, but I couldn’t speak.

I turned my head slowly. Through the sheets of rain, I saw a shadow moving fast toward me. Broad shoulders, purposeful steps—Demyan. He was calling my name. Something in me cracked.

“Perin!”

His voice was louder now.

I couldn’t lift my head. The rain was too heavy, my heart too shattered. I just stayed there, curled up and soaked, wishing the thunder would stop screaming like ghosts from my past.

Then… warmth. A sudden, heavy warmth draped over me.

I looked up through wet lashes to see Demyan crouched beside me, worry etched deep in his face. His coat now hung around my shoulders, shielding me from the worst of the storm. My lips trembled.

“Perin, what are you doing out here? You’re freezing…”

His voice was low, not stern but gentle, too gentle.

But another thunderclap roared overhead, and my body flinched on instinct. I pressed my hands to my ears, curled tighter into myself, and let out a soft sob I couldn’t stop.

Demyan’s arms were around me before I could even think. Strong, warm… and safe.

He didn’t say anything right away. He just held me, letting me bury my face against his chest as the storm raged on.

Every time the sky cracked open, I trembled again, and each time, he only tightened his hold, like he was trying to protect me from the very world itself.

“Shh,” he whispered against my wet hair. “I’ve got you. I’ve got you, Perin…”

I hated how broken I felt. How I couldn’t hide it anymore. How I wasn’t Perin right now I was just Pearl, that frightened little girl trapped in memories she couldn’t outrun.

“I… I can’t—” I tried to speak, but the words turned to sobs. “The rain… the thunder—”

“I know,” he said, and somehow, I believed that he did.

Without warning, he scooped me into his arms. I gasped, grabbing at his robe.

“D-Demyan, where are we—?”

“We’re not going back to the dorm,” he said, voice firm. “You don’t need anyone seeing you like this.. If they see you in this vulnerable state they will take advantage of you in the future.”

He carried me like I weighed nothing. I couldn’t stop trembling, but the rhythm of his footsteps was grounding. His chest was warm against my cheek, his scent familiar and strong. I clung to him like he was the only thing holding me to this world.

He brought me to a small, empty house. I didn’t know who it belonged to, but he seemed to have the key. When the door shut behind us, and the sound of the rain softened outside, I finally exhaled.

Demyan placed me on a small bed covered in clean sheets. He knelt in front of me, brushing a wet strand of hair from my cheek. His eyes searched mine with such tenderness, it made my throat tighten all over again.

“You’re safe,” he said quietly. “No one will hurt you here.”

And just like that… the sobs returned.

But this time, I didn’t cry alone.

His arms were around me again, stronger than the storm. And for the first time in a long time…

I let someone else hold me through the pain. His arms were steady. Solid. Unmoving.

I didn’t know how long he held me. The sound of the storm outside faded into a dull hum, and I was aware only of the rise and fall of his chest beneath my cheek. Warmth slowly returned to my body, but a different kind of ache remained inside.

It wasn’t from the cold. It was from remembering.

I sniffled, still clinging to him. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to break down.”

Demyan didn’t pull away. “Stop apologizing,” he said gently, his voice rumbling low against my ear. “Everyone has something they’re running from.”

I pulled back a little to look at him. His dark hair was damp, messily falling over his forehead, his eyes locked on mine. There was no pity in them. Just concern. And something else I couldn’t name.

I hesitated, then whispered, “I lost someone… on a night like this.”

His gaze softened, and he didn’t press me further. Just waited.

“The rain,” I continued, voice shaking. “The thunder. It always brings it back. I feel… small. Trapped. Like I’m still there. Watching it happen.”

My hands were trembling again, so I curled them into fists in my lap.

He took one of them gently, his thumb brushing across my knuckles. “You’re not there anymore,” he said. “You’re here. With me. And I swear, as long as I’m around, no one, nothing is going to hurt you.”

My chest clenched. Those words… they felt too big. Too safe.

I looked away, blinking fast. “You don’t even know me.”

“I know enough,” he said, voice firmer now. “I know you’re strong. I know you hide things behind that sharp mouth and calm mask. And I know that someone like Lucien had no right to be near you.”

I flinched slightly at the name, but nodded.

He reached for a blanket nearby and gently wrapped it around my shoulders. When I looked back up at him, I caught the faintest trace of a frown on his lips.

“Who told you to be this strong?” he asked quietly. “Who made you think you had to fight everything alone?”

I couldn’t answer. Not truthfully.

So instead, I looked at him and said, “I’ve just… always had to.”

He didn’t argue. Didn’t call me out. He just nodded, as if he understood. And in some strange, terrifying way… I think he did.

The silence stretched between us, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was warm, heavy with unspoken things.

Then, Demyan moved to sit beside the bed, his back against the wall, arms loosely crossed. He glanced at me once more. “Try to rest,” he said softly. “I’ll be right here.”

I wrapped the blanket tighter around me. My eyes stayed on him for a moment longer. His presence was grounding. And for the first time since the storm began, I didn’t feel like I was drowning.

Maybe… just for tonight… I could let someone else carry the weight.

And as my eyes began to close, one last thought passed through my mind:

He’s not just a protector.

He’s the only person who’s ever made me feel… safe. The storm outside had softened to a drizzle.

But inside me… it hadn’t quieted at all.

I lay curled beneath the blanket, staring at the shadows flickering on the ceiling of the small shelter. Demyan hadn’t moved from his spot against the wall. He was silent now, but his presence filled the entire room, like warmth itself had taken a solid shape and chosen to sit beside me.

My eyes drifted to him again.

He looked tired. His head leaned slightly to the side, eyes half-lidded. But he was alert, watching the door, the window and me.

Always watching.

Why does it feel like he sees right through me?

I swallowed, pulling the blanket up to my chin. My heart beat in a strange rhythm, one that had nothing to do with fear and everything to do with… him.

The way he’d carried me.

The way he hadn’t said a word about how I looked, or how tightly I clung to him.

The way his coat still hung over my shoulders, smelling faintly of his scent, cedar and sandalwood and something warm I couldn’t name.

I turned over, quietly, and buried my face into the crook of the blanket. But even in the darkness, the thought rose like a whisper.

Is this… what it feels like to be safe with someone?

To not have to fight, or pretend, or flinch at every sound?

To let my guard down just for a moment and not fear the consequences?

It scared me, how easy it had become to trust him.

Demyan was dangerous.

Not because he was powerful. Not because he could see through my lies.

But because… my heart beat differently when he was near. Like it had finally found something it had been looking for.

Something it wasn’t ready for.

And yet… I wanted more.

More of his warmth. More of his teasing. More of the way he looked at me like I was something precious, not something broken.

This can’t happen.

I’m not supposed to feel this way.

I’m not even supposed to be Pearl.

I clutched the coat tighter, as if it could quiet the storm that had nothing to do with the rain.

Demyan shifted slightly in the dark. I closed my eyes quickly, pretending to sleep. But I couldn’t, not when he was so close.

The rain had finally stopped.

A soft mist clung to the ground outside the window, and faint streaks of dawn were beginning to bleed through the cracks in the shutters. I hadn’t slept. Not really.

Not with him here… and my thoughts in such a mess.

Demyan had dozed off sometime before the sky began to lighten. He sat against the wall, legs stretched out, arms crossed, his head tilted slightly as he rested. He looked peaceful, like the storm hadn’t just passed outside but through him and now it had gone.

I stood slowly, careful not to wake him. The warmth of his coat still hung around my shoulders. I wrapped it tighter, breathing in his scent one more time.

I didn’t want to leave.

But I had to.

If someone noticed I was gone, if rumors started to spread… everything I’d worked so hard to hide could fall apart.

I stepped closer to him, the wooden floor creaking softly under my weight. My heart thudded harder as I looked at him.

His lips were parted slightly, his dark lashes fanned gently over his cheeks. He looked so different like this. Younger. Softer. And still… just as dangerous to my heart.

I hesitated.

And then, on impulse, maybe the most reckless thing I’d done all week, I leaned in, just a little.

My hand hovered over his arm, just for a second, before I let it rest lightly there. His skin was warm beneath my fingers.

“Thank you,” I whispered, barely a breath of sound. “For everything.”

Then I leaned in closer and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead.

My lips lingered there for a second longer than they should have.

A second too long for someone I was pretending to be “just friends” with.

A second too long for someone who didn’t even know I was a girl.

But I didn’t care.

Not at that moment.

I stepped back, brushing a strand of hair from his brow, and turned toward the door.

With one last look, I slipped out of the shelter, his coat still wrapped around me vanishing into the quiet morning before the rest of the world could wake up.