After that night, he couldn’t bear to return to his bride’s chambers. Saying he was concerned that the young lady was still too fragile to accommodate him, he insisted on returning early to the battlefield, with the excuse that his absence would give her time to become stronger.
He really just wanted to get away. He hoped he could accomplish something during this campaign season that would reduce the urgency of fathering a child. At the very least, he hoped the reprieve would give him more time to get used to the thought—that he’d finally be able to go through with what must be done by the time he returned.
But what occupied most of his thoughts was Bai Ruyi enduring all of this by himself. As best as he could, he filled the messages he sent back home with reaffirmations of his love. He
