No Turning Back

1419 Words
Brianna The first day of the rest of my life! Bag packed, yes bag as in singular. I had not realized just how much I did not belong to the Dawson Pack until that moment. I mean I did not have friends so that should have been indication enough but when everything I owned in sixteen years fit in one back pack reality hit. I was neither needed nor wanted here. Locking the doors to my place I return the keys the Alpha, it was Pack property after all. My house had never felt like home, it was just a place I was taking shelter and could take care of my needs. I had moved in when I was twelve. I am pretty sure a lot of pre teens would had enjoyed the freedom of living on their own but I didn't. My parents had a house on pack grounds when I was younger but after they left and did not come back for years it had been demolished to make room for training. My house used to be at the edge of the Pack and the Alpha had thought that it would be the best place for training because in his words, it was private and away from the prying eyes of the humans. If you ask me I would say he had been targeting that piece of land even when my parent were around but did not have any good reason to acquire it. I had been moved quickly into the Pack Orphanage the same day my parents had left. Something about an amazing Luna concerned about the pups in the Pack. The act of compassion had gotten attention of neighboring packs earning Dawson Pack a good reputation. Everyone had fussed over me the first week I was taken to the orphanage, I was the Pack charity case, the poor abandoned pup and then nothing! The Luna never came back, the nannies started ignoring my existence, other pups in the orphanage got adopted save for me. No one wanted me. "What if her parents abandoned her because she is a bad omen? She has to be a curse" I had no idea how or when the rumor had started but at the age when a child needed the most socialization I had been labelled an outcast. Not even potential adopters gave me a second look. "Look, they would rather stay childless than adopt Brianna" I heard one of the nannies tell the rest this one time I was the only one left at the orphanage. I watched as all the other pups left, one after the other getting a family of their own but fate had decided I would not have the same thing. Then I had turned to books, books became my refuge at my young age getting lost in the fantasy contained in the several pages for hours was the only way I could get away from my pathetic life. I am still thankful I had not been physically bullied, maybe a little emotionally scarred but nothing major. I remember the first day of school, the Pack pups were sent to school by their parents save for me but I had learnt earlier not to ask questions so I had dragged my feet all the way to school. My reputation had clearly preceded me. No kids wanted to play with me, in their young minds associating with me would lead them to be abandoned too and that was when I had lost hope in making any friends. As for the orphanage I moved out or you could say was 'politely' asked to leave when I turned twelve something about other pups needing the space more and I was a grown girl now. The Alpha had oh so graciously allocated me a house in the Pack to live in. They had let a twelve year old girl to live on her own, I mean I know a few twelve year olds who would have loved to traded place in me to live on their own but I did not like it. Once again I was getting abandoned, this time round by the pack. I got a barely furnished house but it was better than nothing, I had roof over my head and could eat the left overs from the pack house but right now I was going to lose all that because of one James Ellacott. I was the abandoned pup at the Pack surely he must have known I would have no where to go if he rejected me but I guess he did not really care about his mate's, no ex mate's well being. You would think that by this time I would be used to being unwanted but it still did hurt a little bit, I was almost tempted to blame my parents for my rejection. I mean when you really sat down and thought about it every thing that had happened and was still happening to me was a result of them leaving me behind. Knocking lightly before making my way into the Alpha office, "Alpha Colton, I would like to return the keys to my house." I say dangling the keys in front of me. "You room mates have copies?" the audacity! So this man who claims to treat Pack members equally had no idea I lived alone? Wasn't an Alpha supposed to be aware of the happenings in their pack? Room mates? What room mates? But I do not ask him that, instead I steady my emotions and say, "I have no room mates sir. I have always lived on my own." "Alone? Aren't you too young to be on your own Brianna?" well at least he has the decency to look surprised. "Who gave that order?" I almost chuckle out loud at the 'concern' in his face when asking me all these question. He was the one that had given me the house even sent nannies to giving me allowance for my daily necessities how could he not know I was living alone? Why was he lying? "I don't know who gave the order Alpha, I just came to bring the key because I did not know who else to give them to." I could not accuse the Alpha to his face so I acted like I had no idea what was going on behind the scenes. I was already leaving, there was no need to part on bad terms with an Alpha even though I badly I wanted to throw his hypocrisy in his face. "Dawson Pack has really let you down Brianna haven't we?" he then says after being quiet for a while. So now he realizes it? I had been single out all of my life in this pack and now this man was trying to act all remorseful and understanding when I want to leave? What a thick face! "Not really, I have been mostly ok Alpha." part of me really wants to go off on him but I decide not to. I was already going to be crossing paths with several Alphas in future there was no problem making one less enemy even if it meant pretending everything was ok. "I wish you good luck in your journey." says Alpha Colton before reaching into his desk drawer and handing me a brown envelop. "I hope this aids you along the way." "Thank you sir." I say taking it from him. Then I realize that I have been calling him Alpha all this time, he was no longer my alpha but it was force habit to address him that way. Bowing my head low one last time I make my way out of Alpha Colton's office and out of Dawson Pack passing by the school where James is at. Part of me wants him to see me leaving to let him know that I was not some pushover but I don't get the satisfaction. Classes are still on going and no one gets to see me leave. Making my way to the train station to get my first ticket to freedom, you know that feeling of second thoughts that people always got before doing something life changing? I did not get it. I was leaving and my wolf was in full support. "Goodbye Dawson Pack." "Goodbye James, hopefully we never cross paths again in this life." I think to myself while making my way to my cabin. This was it. No turning back now. "...."
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