To Give And Take

CHAPTER 14

"Do you know what you're talking about?" Lucy asked with uncertainty, her baby blue eyes glistened with a warm and unpredictable liquid. Her expression had alternated from shock to surprise and finally settling to sly tease, yet she maintained a seriouse tone from her voice. She had listened to him with seriouseness, without the slightest joke of emotions that ussually jumbled about upon receiving a marriage proposal.

He understood clearly why she didn't play by the rules, because he didn't either, so they both shared a common thought.

"Lucy, I'm a full grown man in his thirties, do you think I'm still a teenage minded thug trying new games at whim."

"No." Lucy replied without hesitation ; "Jane said you could have been considered a virgin even after you had past your rebelliouse period. Though I don't believe in a man's abstinence, I believe your gentlemanly charisma had you holding back, right."

Austin frowned at her comment but he didn't interrupt her, neither agreeing nor refuting her words. To him it was meaningless to go back on a race, either we're moving forward or we don't move at all. The past was part of every human's life, either good or bad it came with its merits and dimerits.

"Am I right?" She was slightly shorter than him, but she matched his tall figure, raising her head at him without any hint of vigilance. Her snow white shoulders were slightly exposed to his view, coupled with her exquisite face, her beauty was brought close to him. A faint delicate apple milk fragrance kissed his nose, causing a slight manly change in his body, he wanted to tell her that even a gentleman could lose control of himself as long as he was a man faced with an immortal beauty.

"No matter how gentlemanly I am, Lucy you shouldn't forget that I'm still a man."

Her pink cherry lips curled into a beautiful smile that could warm anyone's heart, causing them to be completely charmed and unable to extricate themselves from the shackles of her beauty. He had always known that Lucy Grey was an etheral beauty who could topple down cities with a smile. He could understand the clumsiness of men at the presence of such a beauty who seemed unware of the crime she commited.

She drove others to sin.

"You're not going to throw yourself at me, are you?"

She kept challenging his limits with interest, probably she found it amusing. She didn't show any hint of fear or undisguised nervouseness he had witnessed from the couple of women who had once faced him, he knew the women he needed to avoid, and Lucy was one he had to impress and conquer. Her expression was void of infatuation but bountiful of admiration. He took a deep breath and exhaled lightly to regain a steady control of his current jumbled up emotions.

"Lucy, can we not change topic, I'm seriouse."

He surely was, she knew he wasn't one of those teenagers who obcessively wanted to possess her, peeking at her at the corner or pulling out stunts to catch her attention. She wasn't a fish, but several hooks had been set for her, targetting her like a prey.

However, Austin Kingston brought a whole new experience with him, he was clearly amazed by her beauty, but he wasn't charmed by her. His electric blue eyes were deep with an unfathomable gaze, she knew that he wasn't the type of man who played romantic games.

"I know that my proposal might seem sudden considering that we've only known for barely four days."

'Was it really just barely four days ?'

Lucy murmured in her mind with uncertainty, analysing the truth with memories. If Austin hadn't reminded her she would forgotten that they had really only known for a couple of days. The first time she heard about this man, she had just thought of him as another in a pile. However, Jane had made her more and more curiouse to test the almost perfect man who had been married twice in his life. According to the reports about him from his sister, it was impossible for any woman to leave such a golden man, but he ended up with a prison record before his divorce.

At the beginning she had just been trying to test his limit, she was curiouse about his calm, curiouse if such an almost perfect man could expose his flaws. She had just placed a test on Jane's words and he had passed each of them without failure, her impression of him had improved in just a few days.

They had really only known for a few days, but she had a strong feeling that their connaissance and encounter could be counted in a decade.

"Lucy, my proposal might seem cassual but it isn't driven by self impulse, I've reached the age where I can clearly tell what's wrong or good."

He knew what he wanted without a second thought, he didn't need to make a few tests to gain experience. His profound gaze and mature aura was a prove that he had gone through vicissitudes of life, at his age it was either he did it right or he didn't do it at all. He took a step closer towards her, yet maintaining a comfortable distance with her.

"You've caught my attention and I won't beat arround the bush with you, so I'm going to be honest with you." His hot breath slightly brushed her face, while his gaze held hers firmly. "I don't know the type of husband you have in mind but I believe that I match a greater part of your expectations."

He wasn't narcissistic in his comment, sincerely and honestly speaking out his thoughts with a firm gaze that held hers without averting. He was a man who knew what he wanted, he was mature and old enough to make decisions for himself. Lucy had a certain admiration for people of his age who were direct, straightforward and firm in their decision. Jane had once told her about this personality of her brother and she had extended listening ears to those accounts with interest. After meeting the protagonist of those tales, she had used every opportunity to test and confirm those tales.

"Do you dislike me or the fact that I'm an old divorcee with a criminal record?"

Everyone had a dimerit, a flaw or part of their personality that wasn't appreciated or arouse annoyance, she wasn't exempted from it either. Austin Kingston's dimerit was still unknown to her because Jane only had praises for him. The little stain in his life and reputation could not really be taken into consideration.

"I can make changes to my record and adjustments to my personality if disliked, but age is a number that I can't change, it's thesame for my previous status."

Certain stains in one's life was impossible to wipe off or hide from others, carrying along was barely a solution to make it forgetful. Austin Kingston wasn't a man who was easily defeated, she heard it from Jane and she knew he was what she had heard.

'His decision was firm and decisive' He would never change his ideas for the compromise of others, Jane would never lie at this point.

"Would you really make a compromise for me?"

Her question was unecessary, but she suddenly found herself asking this simple question, his sentence had triggered her. He was a man who never admitted defeat, not in the past and never in front of others. He held everything in control, never letting anything slip off his control.

"Do you dislike any of my dimerit ?"

His voice was cool, mellow and deep like a cello, but firm nobility, gentle and strong like his character, it was unimaginable to portray this voice throwing curses to express its undisguised anger. Jane hadn't said if Austin Kingston had throwed curses along with punches while he had plundered his brother in-law. She had never been witness of what had happened that day, she only heard about it and saw the evidence of Austin Kingston's anger on her husband who lay limply on a hospital bed.

'How was his expression and what were his words that probably didn't match his personality.?'

He was a man of few words, but would he say more words with a harsh tone due to his comprehensive anger, it was difficult to portray him like that, it didn't match his image and personality.

"I'm curiouse, have you cursed at others in a loud voice to display your anger?"

Her curiosity wasn't extinguished even after testing Austin Kingston, challenging his calm at every moment to pick out his bottom line.

"Lucy, I asked a question." He surely did, she knew it but she had deliberately tried to change the topic. It had always worked from the moment she had met him, little did she realise that Austin had deliberately let her change the topic.

He had never liked diverting from his topic of discussion, but he had made a lot of compromise for Lucy. She was a woman he wanted and desired, he would never be wrong with his feelings, the passage of time had proven it.

"No, I don't. Every body has a dimerit in their life, I'm not an exception either." Austin witnessed the sad and painful expression that prevailed Lucy's bitterness. She had never shown fear or pain in front of him, not even defeat when she felt defeated by him. She always had a cheerful expression despite the cold imprinted in her bones, she always gave a warm and comfortable feeling. She had a sense of immortality on her that gave her a formidable aura of attraction and distance.

She made you wish to explore every cranny and nooky corners of her, but she also gave off a sense of forbearance, yet she didn't give the impression of being weak either.

"If you knew my dimerit, you'll probably have to rephrase your proposal, I'm not a pure saintess." Lucy spoke earnestly with bitterness, her gaze never left Austin Kingston, as if she was rummaging through his deep gaze, deeper than diving into the sea. His blue electric eyes had no fluctuation, calm and steady like the surface of a water that had no ripples.

"You're not curiouse ?" Lucy's tone was filled with disbelief at his lack of curiosity and calm expression. She had tipped him off with an appetizer of her life, but he didn't de show the slightest change of expression, neither curiouse nor enthusiastic.

"Even if I am, the right to speak still belongs to you."

Even if her words had made him curiouse, he would never force her to speak, his being curiouse would not determine either if she was willing to speak. Austin knew it, Lucy equally knew it, she wouldn't say it because she had asked, but because she was willing. She was a woman that couldn't be easily impressed nor regressed, Austin had that idea about her.

"Lucy, you should know that your past doesn't matter to me, my proposal still stands firm."

Lucy smiled, but that beautiful smile was laced with bitterness that made one's heart ache, she was like an injured flower, yet she bloomed beautifully, causing her injury to evoke a strong sense of forbearance.

"You wouldn't say that if you knew that my body had been tainted when I wasn't even off age yet, I'm not a pure little flower Austin."

Her bitter words demeaned her without restraint, giving others an impression that she was a black stain.

"My past negligence had made it difficult for me to bear a child, would you still want this black stain in your life even after knowing she would never bear a child for you. Doesn't it bother you to be with a woman who had an intimate contact with numerouse men in the past?"

Lucy looked closely at Austin's expression, trying to detect the slightest change or frown from it, she had been very clear about her words. She knew that men had their pride and ambitions, Austin was a man as well, though he was different, it didn't make a change to his gender.

Other men had obcessively wanted to possess her, while others gazed at her lecherously, in their eyes she was a beauty worth considering a trophy, just like an accessory.

While her thoughts were still going on, it was suddenly interrupted by a strong force that caused her to gasp in surprise. She unconsciously inhaled a large amount of the citrus sandalwood fragrance, feeling the warm firm hand that encircled her slim waist. A pair of beautiful electric blue eyes gazed at her with an unfathomable emotions that couldn't decipher, it was void of l**t.

"I still stand on my decision, Lucy, even if you told me that you had been with a thousand, I still want to hold that unique title with you." His baritone voice was mellow and gentle, his electric blue eyes never left her gaze but held it firmly. She had heard that what couldn't be said by words could be written in the eyes.

"Lucy, I hate beating arround the bush, so I'll be very sincere towards you."

His free hand was raised up to her delicate face, gently fondling it as if it was the most preciouse jewel. His gentleness seeped into her bones, running through her veins like a spring, immersing her in his gentleness.

"Lucy, I had my eyes set on you from the very first time I met you." It had been barely four days since they had met, but his words seem to imply that he had known her for a decade. However, Lucy knew her thoughts might seem absurd, she might have been blessed with forsight, but she tended to think too much about situations.

"I am deep set on getting you, because I desire to hold you firmly in my arms every night, I'm solely and physically attracted to you."

His ambiguouse words were said slowly like a whisper in her ears, causing an itch on her ears, she would be disgusted by such honesty from men, but Austin didn't disgust her.

"I want to be physical with you, to explore and memorise every part of your body and merge it with mine." For a moment, Lucy had the impression she had seen l**t in his eyes, but that faint feeling was unoticeable, just like an illusion.

"You're so damn straightforward." He had already said so much in just a few words, she had so many s*x invitations in the past, however it was different when such ambiguouse words had been said by Austin Kingston.

"I really desire you, but I'm not going to be the author of f*********n either, trust my words." He immediately let go of his hold on her and firmly held her gaze instead, he had never been embarassed by his confession.

"There's really no comparism to be made between the sun and the moon. Younger men's confession and an older man's confession had thrown more light to my understanding."

Austin frowned, his deep gaze squinted and he asked seriously.

"Do you have a problem with my age?" Lucy smiled and responded

"Do you ussually make such proposals and compromise?" He had been married twice in his life, she was curiouse how he married each of his wife. Jane said his second marriage was an arranged marriage, but what about the first one?

"Lucy, I asked a question."

His gentle, yet commanding tone seemed to remind her that this man would never let her change a topic without giving him an answer. He had never been out of control, even if she really changed the topic, she would still have to give him an answer.

Lucy smiled at this new discovery of him.

"According to experts, men take about 10 years longer to become emotionally mature than for a woman." However, while it describes 10 years as the ideal age gap, it ultimately believes that a relationship can work if a man is five to 10 years older because of some reasons." Lucy paused, her smile was warm and gentle.

"Older men are considered to have more life experience. You can trust their judgment. They're not afraid of intimacy, there's no drama and they've got Old-Fashioned values which I appreciate. They also appreciate the finer things in life and they'll prove that age is just a number."

Austin Kingston had proven that everything about it was true, she liked his maturity and charisma which also attracted her a lot.

"I have to admit that you're the ideal husband for me." Austin didn't say a word to interrupt her, he listened seriously, never taking his gaze away from hers.

"You have more life experience, I trust your judgment. You've least been in a long-term relationship, and your past successes and failures have helped shape who you've become. You're re probably willing to give some advice along the way, too."

Older men are considered to be more responsible and secure. They have no time to play games and they already know what they want which makes them good marriage material. For some ladies, it can be a bit exhausting to be with a younger man who is still learning and discovering life. She was one of those ladies who didn't have time to waste with an imature young man who still had to rely on his parents advice.

"In conclusion, I'm very satisfied with the age gap between us, I really don't mind you being morethan a decade older than me either."

With a satisfied respond, Sneakily breath a sigh of relief, her reply had released that pressure on him. He would have understood that his age could hinder her decision, not every lady would want to spend their life with an older man.

"Now answer my question." She asked with a teasing smile, closing the distance between them, yet avoiding any body contact.

"Go ahead."

"Do you always make such marriage proposal ?" She was very curiouse, a gentleman like Austin Kingston probably wouldn't need to make a demand to girls, girls would probably be flocking at his side like a swam of bees attracted to a single flower. He was handsome,erudite, ultraclassy, the epitome of suave sophistication. With a tall and muscular body that even clothes couldn't hide, he was basically the dream man in maiden's fantasies.

"The union between late Anna and I was purely out of convenience." His explanation was smooth with a story behind it, it was an inquisitive answer but carried with it a rhetorical question that lingered in her mind. Everyone was prone to keeping secrets, she wasn't an exception, Austin Kingston neither.

"Jane had probably told you the history behind my second marriage ?" Austin suddenly reminded her with certainty, he indeed had the right to be certain. Jane Kingston didn't leave the hospital quite often, her last days spent indoors were accompanied by music and herself, not even a family member sat by her side. During her quiet moments she would recount a lot about her experience and admiration towards her elder brother. In other words, she had transfered most of her memories to Lucy Grey, an outsider.

"You're the first Lucy."

Austin spoke with an austern tone, his eyes were gentle with sweetness and an unfathomable emotion that wasn't familiar to her, triggering a strange feeling in her. She felt an additional feeling in her heart, but she couldn't decipher it.

Shaking her head, she pushed the strange feeling at the back of her mind and thoughts, smiling with a teasing look, she tilted her head playfully at him.

"But I feel like we just had a marriage negociation, nothing much of a marriage proposal."

For the first time, Lucy saw a smile hanging on his red sexy lips, his muscular chest vibrated from the low chuckle. She had seen many smiles from men, flirty and lecherouse with some clumsy and beautiful. Austin's low chuckle was noble with elegance and charm, despite not revealing his teeth, she knew he had pearlike white teeth.

"I understand."

He understood, but she didn't, she felt like this short moment had her going through a few gates of mysteries.

Austin Kingston ignored her confused expression, stretching out a hand, he held a few locks of her long hair, gently with care.

"If you don't mind my old age, would you mind giving me the chance of the only prospective husband ?"

It wasn't a confession, neither was it a marriage proposal. It held a possessive tone, but it gave off the feeling of being wanted and cherished by someone. Austin Kingston was really different from other men, suave and sophisticated with a gentle personality. He had an air of nobility that made other men inferior to him, if she had to make a choice, Austin Kingston would be her prospective husband.

"Alright, prospective husband." Her reply was direct without hesitation, as if she already held an answer in her tongue. Unknown to her, this reply had caused Austin's hanging her a place to settle in relief.

"It's eight thirty PM, you haven't had lunch, it won't be good to slepp with an empty stomach, let's go out for dinner."

Austin said with a gentle and concerned voice, she wasn't sure what their relationship was at current, she just knew that they were officially in a relationship. Older men were really different from younger men, she especially loved Austin Kingston straightforwardness, he knew what he needed, but he was also considerate at his dealings. He did things with intent of perfection.

"Austin, do you really not mind my barenness."