YOLANDA
“YOLANDA!” He roars, causing me to freak out and jump off the massage table in fear.
This is not good. Who woke up the monster; what have I done to be thundered at like that?
I look at him and take a deep breath. He is breathing fire, and I am just confused as to what I could have done to upset him. My eyes are on the verge of crying, but that would just make me look guilty about something that I don’t even know.
“Dad,” I softly call out with a heavy heart.
He slowly strides over to me, and as much as I want to run out, my legs are too heavy to carry me away from him.
“Who the f**k is he?” He asks, sonorously.
“I don’t know what you are talking about, daddy,” I finally break into tears, and my lips tremble.
“Don’t f*****g lie to me, baby girl! Who the f**k gave you that on your neck?” Neck? What is he talking about?
“Huh?”
“FUUUUUUCK!” He shouts, kicking the yoga ball that bounces all over the room. “Look in the mirror and tell me what the f**k that is on your neck, and baby girl, you better tell me the truth about it because I am not happy, Yolanda, I am not!”
“Daddy, you are scaring me,”
“You should be scared because I am mad!” He grabs my hand and roughly pulls me closer to the mirror wall and forcefully tilts my head. “Look at that… what is it?” He taps on the side of my neck, and I can slightly see a bruise on it. It is a very dark bruise and I think I might know how I might have obtained it, but I am not telling my dad. He can’t know.
“Daddy, I don’t know how that got to my neck,”
“What did I tell you about boys, Yolanda? Are you now sleeping with boys?”
I shake my head, vigorously as my tears gush out of my eyes uncontrollably. Without a warning, he roughly pulls me out of the gym with my braids and drags me upstairs to my room. I am screaming and begging him to let go of me, but it falls on deaf ears.
“Daddy, why are you doing this?”
“Can’t you see that I am trying to protect you from boys who cannot wait to eat you so that they can break your heart? I am protecting your heart because I don’t want to see you hurt,”
“Protecting me by hurting me? Daddy, I can take care of myself; I don’t need you!”
“Oh, so you are admitting that you are sleeping with boys, aren’t you?” He throws me inside my bedroom and closes the door behind him.
I move steadily backwards, getting away from him, but his quick steps catchup with me.
“Do you know what I do to people who disobey me?” His voice gets monstrous. I shake my head and put my hands together in a praying form. “It is good that you don’t know because you don’t want to know, trust me; but baby girl, it is not good,”
He grabs my arm and flips me, pinning me against the wall. His hard body pins against me and he runs his hand on the side of my face. I close my eyes, scared of whatever he is planning to do.
“I am not going to take off my belt, at least not today, but baby girl, you do know how I don’t like it when boys touch you, especially in an inappropriate manner. Do you know what that does to daddy?” His tone is now a bit calm and tantalising. Something in that voice tells me that the monster dad is gone, and I am now safe. I am tempted to turn around and face him, but I am still scared.
“Please, I am sorry,”
“No, hush. You have a bright future, Yolanda. You are going to be a perfect doctor – if that is who you still want to be, and I want to be there when you achieve that milestone. You know, I never thought I would do this so soon, but you are f*****g forcing me to!” He growls, annoyed.
“What?” I ask, nervously.
He stays silent, still pinned against me, and I can hear his heart beating through his chest on my back faster. I wonder why it is, but I love hearing it. It makes me understand him and connect with him emotionally; I just don’t know if he feels the same way.
His hands roam around my shoulders and neck. His hands are very gentle and soothing, I almost held them tight so that I don’t lose his touch, but I am not comfortable — my dad is making me uncomfortable.
“Daddy?”
“Sshh… I am still thinking of the best way to punish you, little girl. You disobeyed me, and that is what you deserve,”
He is already weighing his big body on me. He is so heavy, so how much more does he want to punish me?
“What are you going to do to me?” Impatiently, I ask. He abruptly turns me before he picks me up and still pins me against the wall. I swear if it could speak, it would have had enough of me. “What are you doing?” I still ask, but this time I am looking into his eyes, and my heart is pounding very hard. He is looking at me differently.
“I hate it when boys touch this. This belongs to me, Yolanda!” Unexpectedly, he squeezes my butt, causing me to scream and cry all over again. “Come on, you are a smart girl. I did not have to spell out to you my intentions, and I know that you noticed. I wanted to wait until you finish your exams, but I can’t anymore. I want you to know that I will be keeping a close eye on you because baby girl, I hate being bullshitted at,” He speaks, so murderous.
I won’t lie and say that I have never seen this day coming, but I never imagined my stepfather confessing something so detestable as this. He is supposed to be my stepfather.
Yes, I also had weird feelings towards him, but I kept them to myself, and Kyle washed them away, replacing them with his. This is absurd!
“Dad, no!” I cry out. “Get me down!”
“First, tell me who he is!"