Lavender

Chapter 29 - Beginnings

LAVENDER'S POV 

I keep myself silent as I am still in Damon's arms, carrying me but when I noticed where's Damon is walking, making me raise an eyebrow. 

"W-where are we going? Y-you can put me down now," I said but Damon just laughed before entering the library. 

"You don't need to be shy now, Lavender. We kissed. That means something for the both of us," he said with a tone of confidence on what he said.

But I'm not okay with what he said. It just made me remember of how far I should stay away from him, from Damon, or even Daisy because I don't think I can forget what just happened earlier. Even if I can feel butterflies in my stomach, I'm not going to let myself fall more and let my feelings for the both of them go deeper. 

"No, please. Put me down now," I said, trying to be calm while feeling my heart racing as I inhale Damon's intoxicating perfume that I admit, helping me to think bad things with Damon.

Damn it! Why did he suddenly appear anyway? He is supposed to be at work. Focusing his self to Ellington Enterprises as I remembered that he has rivals for his Dad's company who's wanting to take over Damon's position as Chief Executive Officer. 

"P-put me down n-now, S-sir," I asked again since Damon ignored what I said earlier but again, he just laughed which making me a little pissed. 

"You know..." Damon said as he entered a bedroom that is not familiar. 

I never saw this bedroom since I started working here in the mansion. Is this Damon's bedroom? I asked to myself. 

"You just got drowned. I don't think I want you far from me starting right at this moment," he said that made my heart instantly beats crazily. 

Goddamn it! Why does he have to say those words? He's making my heart beats so fast but my heart is not what matters right now. It's my fear. The fear that I might lose myself again and give in once Damon does anything crazy while we are both in place together, just like what happened to the library last night. 

Damon slowly put me down to sit on the top of his bed as soon as he reached his bed but I immediately leaned back as Damon put both of his hands in the sides of my thigh while getting his face near to mine. 

Shit! 

"I-I'm fine, S-sir—"

"You should stop the formalities and calling me Sir, Lavender. You don't know what you are doing to me every time you say those words," he said as his grey eyes stare back at mine.

What are my words doing to him? That's absurd. He must be playing at me. 

"You understand what I said, Lavender?" he said again that made me gulped.

I don't know how to answer him. I do not know how to make myself talk while feeling my heart like it's going to burst out in my chest just dor Damon who's face is still near to mine. 

"You understand, Lavender?" he said again but this time, he said it huskily, making me gulped in nervousness while I can still feel my heart beating crazily because of him.

Damn. I must put an end to this. He must stop making me feel this way, making me feel mixed emotions. And I should not be feeling this way. I really need to stop feeling excited and confused whenever he is around. If I let this continue, I don't know what's going to happen to me. 

I don't even know him that long to trust my heart beating for what is happening to the both of us right now. I'm not that stupid to know what's happening to the both of us called but I don't want to go there. Even if I keep myself denying, wanting to get far away from him even if I'm starting to find his presence around the mansion. 

I know that we just kissed last night and it just happened last night but what happened woke me up the whole night and I admit, what I really am feeling towards him, I think it will help me more so that I have more reason to push myself far away from him.  

"C-can you move away, please?" I said but Damon did not even flinch.

He just continued to look at me even if I could feel both of my arms and hands getting numb because he was still near to me. Damn it, this must be stopped.

"Please, Damon," I said, using his name now so that he will get away from me for doing what he wants but what he did next made my breathing stalled.

He smiled. He smiled handsomely and it was not like the ones I'm seeing from him back when we are in high school. The smile he was showing to me was different from those he has shown before. 

Or maybe. He's just having fun of me. Looking an i***t under his dominantly intimidating presence. 

"Damon, please. Can you move a—" 

He cut me off by kissing me. Making my already crazy heart beat erratically as I now feel his lips moving against mine. Damn it, damn it, damn it! I need to f*****g move. I must stop him. I mush pushed him away and this time, slap him but I just couldn't.

I couldn't make my body hate him because of what he is doing right at this moment. I can not even raise both of my hands just so I can push him. And as I feel his lips moving to mine, I feel like I'm being drained. That he was taking something I fear it would make me lost my inhibitions again but no. 

If Damon is kissing me now and I can't even move my body, then I should just not let myself kiss him back like I did last night. You must not kiss him back, Lavender! I said in my mind, scolding myself. 

His kisses go on for I don't know how many seconds or minute but I was relieved when Damon suddenly stopped and move away, smiling like an i***t. 

"This is just the beginning, Lavender," he suddenly said that made my heart stop because of what he said. 

Oh, god. No.