Visions of Wolves

Cooling down and heating up

The flight was long, or perhaps I was just restless. Either way I just didn’t feel like myself. How had I grown so attached to a place and people I didn’t even know existed a month ago? Why do I feel like I’m making a mistake leaving?

Casey fetched me from the airport and insisted she come back to my place to catchup.

“We should order pizza, I’m starving!” She said while helping herself to a bottle of wine in the cupboard and pouring us each a glass. 

“You go ahead, I don’t have much of an appetite.” I shouted from my room, slowly sorting my luggage into what needed washing.

“What’s up with you? You’ve been so offish since I fetched you?” Casey always had a good intuition, especially around my moods.

“I’m fine, just tired and happy to be home.” I lied as she handed me a glass of wine and flopped down on my bed.

“You going to explain why you went off the grid for so long?” 

I carried on folding my clothes and shrugged it off, “I made some friends while I was at the hotel and we stayed at their place nearby. The signal was bad.”

“That sounds fun? Why are you being so cagey about it? Tell me more.” She leaned in closer resting her chin on her hands.

“They were really cool, we just hung out, had a few picnics. We just chilled really.”

“Did you meet anyone special?” She said wiggling her eyebrows at me.

I didn’t want to lie. I couldn’t lie, she would be able to tell straight away. I should have planned this better during the flight home but I hadn't, and now I had to think on my feet. 

“Kinda,” I felt my cheeks burning up.

“Kinda!” She shouted back before grabbing the dress in my hands, tossing it to the floor and dragging me over to the bed to sit next to her.

I flopped onto my back with my hands over my face.

“Yes ok, yes. I met someone. But he lives there and I live here and it’s just dumb to think anything will come of it.” I sighed.

“Did you? You know?” She was smiling from ear to ear.

“No, we made out little. I really like him and he likes me. I’m actually going to see him at the end of the month for some work I need to do there.”

“And what’s our mystery man’s name?” She asked taking a big sip of her wine and settling in for a story.

“Uh, Alex. Alexander.”

“Alexander hey,” she said putting on a posh accent. “Tall, dark, handsome?” She asked.

“Yes. Oh god, all of the above.” I said throwing my hands over my face again.

“Do you have a picture? Let me see him.”

“I don’t. He’s not big into social media and my phone broke while I was there.”

“Ok so, our mystery man still remains a mystery then,” she joked before skipping off to the kitchen to grab what was left of the bottle of wine.

“So what now?” She asked when she got back to my room.

“Honestly Casey, I really don’t know.”

We spent the rest of the evening chatting. I told her about Alex and the others, leaving out all the shifter business of course. She had ordered pizza but I wasn’t hungry. Despite how good it felt to be home and chatting with Casey, I couldn’t shake the deep sadness I felt.

As the days passed it got a little easier, but I never got my appetite back. I used an old phone to text Alex pretty much all day. I had been reading all the books he had sent back with me and had a lot of questions about their history and beliefs. He was a great storyteller and most nights would call me and tell me another interesting story about their world.

I wasn’t sleeping too well though. Every night I’d drift off and have those vivid dreams. A woman in the forest, someone tying beads around my wrist, purple flowers, children running around an open fire, women dancing in white dresses under the full moon, a scar down the side of my body. They had been even more vivid since I got back. With little sleep and not much of an appetite, I wasn’t feeling my best.

_____________________

The three weeks since I’d been back dragged on. I was one week away from seeing Alex again and Casey had agreed to go shopping with me. As we walked through the mall I felt my stomach cramp, pulling uncomfortably tight. At first I just gripped onto the nearest railing or wall for a second to steady myself, but eventually I had to stop and hunch over completely.

“You alright Teal? Maybe we should head home and get you a hot water bottle?” Casey asked watching me sit and pull my knees to my chest in the fitting room. 

“No, no, I’ll be fine. I’m just cramping. I won’t have time in the week to go shopping and I see Alex next weekend.”

We continued walking around the mall. I clenched my stomach muscles as tightly as I possibly could while we walked, but a wave of pain hit me so hard I had to grab onto the railing nearby to steady myself. I groaned so loudly a few people stopped to look at me as they walked by.

“Whoa Teal, this is sounding really bad. I think we should leave.” Casey said while trying to usher me to the exit.

As I opened my mouth to protest another wave hit me so hard I felt like my stomach was caving in. The feeling travelled from my stomach to my throat and I dashed forward to a nearby bin, vomiting up the coffee and pretzel I had barely managed to get down an hour earlier. “Ok, ok I need to go.” I said while scrambling through my bag for a wet wipe.

We headed to her car but had to stop at almost every bin along the way so that I could dry heave. By the time we got to her car the tears were streaming down my face and I was completely hunched over. She opened the back door and let me lie across the back seat with my knees to my chest, groaning in pain. She had to pull over twice for me to dry heave outside the car before we got back to my place.

“Teal, I seriously think I should just take you to the hospital. You’re so pale!” Casey begged while watching me in her rearview mirror.

“No. No I just want to go home.” I groaned through the pain.

Casey helped me to my room then disappeared into the kitchen to find me a hot water bottle and some herbal tea.

I lay in the foetal position on my bed, unable to move but groaning in pain. In the distance I heard my phone ring, but I was too sore to answer it. Every joint and muscle ached.

When it rang a third time Casey brought it to me.

“It’s Alex, should I answer?” She said looking me over with great concern.

“I don’t care,” was all I could manage. I had texted Alex earlier to say I wasn’t feeling great but hadn’t had a chance to follow-up that message with an update.

“Hi Alex, it’s Casey, Teal’s friend. She can’t come to the phone right now…oh, no no, nothing’s wrong. She’s just not feeling well, she’s got really bad cramps but I’m making her a hot water…no, it’s ok there’s no need…oh. Ok then. Bye,” Casey looked at me confused.

“What did he say?” I groaned.

“Oh so we do care?” She joked, but now was not the time for jokes. I just groaned loudly in response.

“He said he knows a doctor nearby that he’s going to send over to help. I tried to tell him it wasn’t necessary but he insisted.” She rolled her eyes, not a lot of people tell Casey what to do.

Casey gave me the hot water bottle that I hugged tightly while she rubbed my back. I could feel my bones and joints turn under my skin. After sometime we heard a knock at the door that was so loud and rough Casey and I both jumped. Casey let our guest in.

“Where is she?” Said an elderly women with short brown hair. She didn’t even greet Casey as she stormed passed.

She came in, looked me over, looked around the room and then grabbed my arm, roughly pulling me upright. “Let me go! You’re hurting me!” I cried out as she dragged me to the shower.

Casey ran to my defence, “hey! What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Put the shower on, cold.” Was all the woman said as she dragged me inside.

“Turn it on!” She growled at Casey.

Casey did what she was told, her eyes wide with terror. I gasped as the cold water hit my body feeling like sharp icicles piercing me all over.

“Where are the herbs Mabel gave you?” She asked me.

“Kitchen,” I cried out.

The woman left the bathroom presumably in search of the herbs.

“Teal, I’m worried, what can I do? How can I help you?” Casey stood back staring at me in utter shock.

After some time I felt the pain start to fade. The cold water didn’t sting as much, in fact I found it soothing. Casey helped me get out the shower. She brought me some dry pyjamas and when we left the bathroom the woman joined us in my bedroom with tea made from Mabel’s herbs.

It smelt terrible, but the look on her face warned me that I had to drink every last drop. So I did.

Eventually she introduced herself as Meredith. While she gave no straight answers to our questions I knew she obviously worked with the shifters. Casey on the other hand assumed she was just an alternative medicine woman.

It took me a long time to convince Casey I was fine and that she could leave. Meredith stayed for a while, showing me how to prepare the tea incase this happens again.

“It’s only going to get worse you know,” she said grabbing her bag on the way out. “The heat I mean. The longer you go unmarked, the longer your body is going to call to your mate.”

And with that she left and I felt completely torn. I phoned my family before I spoke to Alex. I’d seen them the weekend before but today’s whole ordeal made me realise I might really have to move away. 

I’d still visit them often. But it wouldn’t be the same. I’d also have to say goodbye to Casey too. It was hard knowing we wouldn’t see each other as much anymore. Beyond that I’d have to convince all of them that going to live with some guy I’d just met was a good idea. I’d have to convince myself too.

When I finally called Alex all I could do was cry. He tried to reassure me that everything was going to be fine, but mostly he just apologised for putting me through this.