Forgiveness For My Dark Angel: Angels of the Apocalypse # 2

4: But Demons Give Gifts

I had not seen such a wealth of food in years. I’d told Amy I’d eat almost anything, so whatever he had available was fine and he didn’t have to go out of his way. He took that to mean make a little bit of everything, and somehow the blessed being decided that breakfast food should feature.

I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen hashbrowns, scrambled eggs, french toast or pancakes, so I had some of each. Plus there were biscuits and sausage and bacon, he’d made chicken and salad, there was fruit and jam, and it suddenly occurred to me that there was no way he’d sourced all these foods locally. I lowered my fork and knife slowly.

“Amy..” I ventured cautiously as soon as my mouth was clear. “This food.. Where did you get it?” I looked up to see him watching me carefully. “I don’t mean to look a gift horse in the mouth, but..”

“Then eat and don’t worry about it.” Amy instructed.

“It’s not violating some taboo of yours, is it?” I swallowed hard as Amy straightened and then laughed.

“There’s no law against helping random humans.” I cringed at his use of the word ‘random’. “Though we have sometimes been banned from helping select ones and instructed to help others. It just depended on our assignments.” He shrugged.

“Ok, and nobody was murdered or harmed for this stuff, either, or you know.. Anything like that?” I glanced at my plate before looking back up to see Amy looking at me with an almost disgusted look that quickly faded into amusement as he burst out laughing again. He laughed so hard he wiped at tears in his eyes. Normally, the sound would have entranced me, but I was starting to feel uncomfortable.

“Oh my dear, sweet Laurel. For a moment, I was afraid you were asking if we were eating them. But now I understand.” I suddenly understood his revulsion and could feel my own expression shift to horror as well. Amy pointed a hand at a free space on the table, what little there was of it. I looked from the spot to him and back again, questioningly, and when my eyes returned to the empty place, it was no longer empty. “Do you like honey? I find it delicious on my biscuits and hotcakes.” Amy casually reached for the little jar of amber liquid and I stared, completely gobsmacked. His expression remained amused as he drizzled the stringy liquid from a spoon.

“Come now, what did you really expect? My home has electricity, water, it survives in a pocket universe. Your people call us Demons and Angels for crying out loud. Celestial and Hellish creatures with remarkable powers. Are you really so surprised?” He met my gaze as he set the jar down and I swallowed hard.

“I.. guess not. I just.. I’ve never seen..” anything like it, I wanted to say. It had to be a trick. But I’d also seen the house’s power and water, which should not exist. I’d seen his face change. Seen his wealth of food stuffs that shouldn’t exist. “I.. our colony would appreciate your aid.” I let my eyes drop back to my place. I suddenly felt very unworthy to be enjoying this meal while my people were starving, to be sitting next to this otherworldly and amazing being. One who had so much hope and determination and the strength and resolve to resist temptation in the hopes of being accepted home after his punishment was served. One with so much power he could squash me like a bug, but had chosen to save me, befriend me, admitted to loving me.

“Please, eat.” Amy murmured. “When we return tomorrow, we’ll take your colony some supplies.” I nodded, not looking at him and forked another bite into my mouth, chewing slowly. Although Amy had not said anything disparaging to me, I felt like I’d been reprimanded, and my heart was broken. I guessed there really was no way for us to be together. Besides, how foolish of me to think that I would even measure up.. “Laurel?” Amy’s voice cut into my thoughts and I reluctantly met his gaze. “You’ve gone silent. Are you ok? The concern in his eyes broke my heart a little more. I offered him a huge, very fake, smile, that I hoped he couldn’t see through.

“Yes, I’m just fine. A lot to think about is all.” I lowered my gaze again before he could search my expression any further. “But seriously, thank you, Amy, for everything. And I’m sorry for trying to push myself on you. If anyone deserves to get back into ‘Heaven’, you do.” There was a soft clatter and I looked up to see Amy’s hand had fallen to his plate, an expression of disbelief and hope mingling on his face. It was like looking at the moon on a cloudy night. So bright, not daring to fully reveal itself, but you kept watching, waiting for it to show, knowing the sight would be worth it. It made me want to protect that hope. Protect Amy. I smiled softly to myself at the thought. Me, protect a Fallen Angel?

Well surely there must be something I could do.. I scooped up another bite of food.

“Are you sure this isn’t too much of a temptation for you?” I mumbled sleepily against Amy’s side. The couch, the fire, the meal, having him pull me under his arm, tuck me against him and wrap a blanket around me.. It all led me to the brink of sleep, and loss of rational thought. Amy chuckled.

“Having you anywhere near me is a temptation. But as long as I don’t touch your bare skin, and try not to breathe so much..” Amy commented.

“That must be.. Uncomfortable.” I said through a yawn. “Oh, the blanket makes sense now.” My muddled brain barely managed to tack on the last bit. Amy chuckled again.

“Yes, that’s one thing the blanket helps with. No skin contact, and keeping your scent trapped.” Amy laughed softly. “Although talking requires breath you know.”

“Oh.. sorry.” I muttered and Amy kissed the top of my head. Then he groaned.

“I should add tasting to that list.” He grumbled.

“Ew.” I sighed. “Hair is yucky. Can’t.. Taste.. Good..” After that I was a goner, but I swore he chuckled and replied that I’d taste good all over. Or maybe that was part of my dreams, because oh. my. Fallen. Angels.

Or at least one. Who featured heavily, and really did nearly taste all of me. So much so that I woke up with wet handmade panties, and a throbbing clit that almost made me forget I had planned to leave Amy alone. I was that desperate. With a harsh exhale, I examined my surroundings. I was in a twin bed in an unfamiliar room. Thick, comfortable blankets were tucked in around me and the soft glow of morning sunlight crept in around light colored curtains over the windows to either side of the bed. A fireplace was tucked into a corner of the room beside the bed, and had burned low. The room was sparsely decorated, but all in light colors minus the wooden furniture which contrasted nicely in a golden mid-tone. For a moment I was confused. I hadn’t seen such beautiful furnishings in forever. Hadn’t been in an actual bedroom like this in longer than I could remember. Rolling over, I looked out the window, which was slightly higher than the bed. Fall flowers greeted me, gently bobbing in an invisible breeze.

“Oh that’s right.. Amy.” I murmured, and let a tear escape my eyes as I remembered my promise to myself to back away from him. If anyone deserved salvation, he did. I wouldn’t stand in his way.

“Oh good.. You’re awake.” Amy’s voice from the doorway interrupted my thoughts. I jumped slightly, making him stifle a chuckle and apologize. “I heard you say my name.” He said quietly, coming into the room to sit on the foot of the bed. “I always hear it when you call for me.” I didn’t know how to take that. Especially with my recent resolve to let him be.

“I’m sorry..” I mumbled and he looked at me funny.

“Why are you apologizing? Now come on, we have much to do before we head back to your colony. First: breakfast.” At the sound of that, my stomach growled and I blushed fiercely, but Amy only laughed. “See, your stomach agrees with me! I’ve left you a few new things to wear here. Take what you want, even if you don’t want to wear it today. I hurt seeing you in such condition when I know I can help.” My blush deepened. How could he act so freakin’ caring and expect me to stay away? I threw the blankets over my head.

“Thank you!” I called from underneath like a child.

“Are you.. Feeling ok Laurel?” Amy was stifling another laugh, I could tell.

“Just go so I can change. I don’t want to accidentally tempt you or anything!” I admit the words came out coated in venom.

“Hmm, I think I’m capable of controlling myself a little better than that.” Amy’s gentle voice was nearly enough to break me. What was with him? Hot then cold, stirring up all my emotions. The creak of the bed signalled his standing though, and the door shut quietly behind him. I stayed under the blanket for several more minutes before forcing myself out to try on some of the clothes Amy had left.

The rest of the morning passed in a blur. Amy had placed fresh cinnamon rolls and chocolate chip muffins on the table, along with eggs and bacon, all of which I ate too much of entirely, and then he was rushing us out the door with heavy packs slung over our backs full of foodstuffs for the colony. Halfway there, he made me stop while he slunk off into the trees, only to return with a deer carcass, making my eyes go wide.

“Where.. How..?” I looked beyond him into the trees and he shrugged a shoulder, self-consciously.

“Unfortunately, the animals are easily influenced here.” Amy stated, not looking at me. The implications were disturbing and sent my mind reeling once again, but as Amy turned away, the deer swung round his neck over the pack, and extended his hand, I took it without thought. Even knowing everything I did, I still trusted him, and beyond that, if I should die by Amy’s hand, it would at least be a beautiful way to go.

Amy slowed as we neared the colony, his hand tightened around mine as his pace decreased.

“That shirt looks good on you by the way.” Amy murmured, dredging up some hidden self-consciousness in me.

“Uh thanks, and thank you for giving it to me.” I plucked at the thick knitted sweater. It was warm enough that I didn’t have to fasten my jacket. I was actually very grateful for it.

“Did you bring the rest like I asked?” He questioned, and I nodded, then realized he might not have seen the gesture.

“Mm-hhm, yeah. I just thought, one thing at a time would be best. Don’t wanna draw too much attention by walking in here in an all new wardrobe. Of course, that didn’t stop me from wearing the socks.” I gave him a cheeky grin and pulled up a pants leg to show them off. Amy smiled softly in return and slowed even further.

“Listen, I..” He began, but I shook my head.

“You don’t have to explain. I get it. I admire you, Amy. I admire your hope, your spirit, your belief.. Your” I waved a hand. “..faith. I.. understand, and I’m backing off. I don’t want to ruin your chances of going home. I don’t want to be the cause of the pain in your eyes.” I tried to gently extract my hand from Amy’s, but instead, he spun me around with it, pulling me against his chest. The deer carcass fell behind him with a thump, and he grabbed my face in both hands. His lips descended on mine in a kiss that stole my breath.

There was a smoky flavor to him, but he was also sweet. It reminded me of roasting marshmallows and making smores, and heat stole through my mouth making my lips and tongue tingle as his own tongue dove into my mouth to explore. I submitted greedily as my body burst with electricity and heat. Was I steaming? I felt like I should be steaming in the cool air. I gripped his forearms to ground myself, certain I might burst into ash and float away, and then all too suddenly, it was over. Amy’s forehead rested against mine.

“Will I see you again?” He asked. Our question to each other, the basis of our very relationship it seemed.

“Do you truly want to?” I breathed. Amy pulled back from me so he could look me in the eyes, his hands still cradling my face.

“Yes.” He whispered so intently it reverberated in my very soul. I ducked my head.

“Then I suppose I’ll be around.” I replied, and yanked myself from his grip, scurrying off toward the colony gates as quickly as I could. I learned later that a deer and a pack of canned and jarred food had been left by the gates, and while the colonists were suspicious, they were too hungry to turn away free food. Especially raw, preserved materials like flour, sugar, cornmeal, corn, beans, potatoes, etc. If anyone noticed the supplies I turned in resembled those left by the gate, nobody ever said a thing. Maybe it was the whole gift horse thing again, who knows. All I knew was I started spending a lot more time near or outside of the gates with my sewing, and volunteered for even more forage expeditions. Food began to regularly appear outside the gates, though no one ever caught the perpetrator. I said silent thanks to Amy every time, hoping he heard me. Whatever meat he left in the form of a caught animal, the skins were used for clothing and blankets, so we had more than one reason to be grateful, and I made sure I mentioned that in my little ‘prayers’.