My Billionaire Ex Is A Vampire

Fvck trophy

It’s not my usual alarm clock waking me up, but my phone chimes in a text message. I can see the sun is way past morning and I groan knowing I’ve overslept. Last night Ben tucked me in bed and left me alone as I wished. I didn’t need to say anything to him, he knew I needed my space. If that is because he is thoughtful or because he read my mind or something I’ll never know. The important bit was that he respected me enough to leave me alone. He didn’t brainwash me or anything. I remember everything and the only thing I need to do now is wrap my head around it all.

My phone chimes again, telling me I’ve got another message. I pick my phone up. The first message is a ‘Get well’ message from my boss at McKingFry. I guess Ben has talked to them for me? I’ll have to rectify this later. I just hope the loan shark mobster doesn’t find out. The other text is from Chris:

“Hey girl. I’m on my way to you. Ben told me you needed some girl talk. I’m masculine today, so you get what you get. I’ll listen anyway.”

Me and my best friend Chris have been through a lot of sh!t together, so that Ben asked them to come to me feels comforting. I have no idea what to tell Chris, but I guess I’ll figure it out. Can I tell Chris that vampires exist?

As I’m about to get out of bed, Ben answers this question as a text from him ticks in:

“Hey my love. Chris is on their way to you. Tell your friend everything. They had to deal with a similar shock a few years back. We will talk later. I have told your bosses you are not well enough for work rest of the weekend. I’m sorry you got caught in this.”

I read the last sentence over and over again, fixating on it. The doo doo head is sorry for me getting caught in what? I know my ex is a vampire, but what is he? He never told me about that. Is he a magician? A demon? A unicorn? Something I’ve never heard of? I can’t figure this out on my own, so maybe talking to Chris will help? Chris is my go to person when it comes to a heart to heart, so I guess I'm thankful for Ben telling Chris I need them.

I get up from the massive bed and go to take a shower. Lingering in the hot water I think of how to tell Chris. Where to start? That Ben is possibly a fracking gremlin, but not a vampire. Sean on the other hand is a vampire and Ben commanded him to leave me alone. Fudge! Like how powerful do you need to be to command a blood leach away?

Finally downstairs I find Chris already in the kitchen. They is dressed in blue jeans and a grey hoodie with the words ‘Just do it’. They have found the juice, white wine, and are cutting fruit for a white sangria. Next to them is a bag full of pastries and several small containers of ice cream.

“Are you planning to kill me? Isn’t it a bit early to get drunk?” I ask, halfway joking, picking up the strawberry ice cream first. I have no plans of being sensible.

“I had a talk with your boyfriend and he said you needed to get drunk and spill some tea. Not to mention it’s way past noon already. Now eat some while I finish making this,” Chris says and adds “I’m feeling masculine today, but got my period so I‘m a bit cranky. Bear with me.”

“Grrrr,” I answer, clawing the air in front of me. “Fine time to get drunk for you too, then.” They only nod in agreement. Me and Chris go way back and I’ve been there before when they tried to find themselves and supported them when they found out that it is gender fluid that fits their identity best.

Giving me a big glass of sangria we make a toast for the gods of drunkards and take our first sip. I smack my lips, it’s delicious and sweet. I know Chris doesn't like it as sweet so this is made to make me drunk not them. To enhance this they look over the glass raising their eyebrows. “So? Sean is back?” I take another big sip before answering.

“Yeah. He said he is a vampire now.” I look at Chris, wondering at their reaction. A week ago I would have laughed out loud, possibly falling and rolling on the floor, from this news. 

“Fvck! Really?” Is the only response I get from Chris. I see surprise in their eyes, but it’s not the vampires-exist-thing, it’s the fact that Sean clearly is one.

“Yes. He said the woman he cheated with was a vampire who had control over his mind and he didn’t do it on purpose.” I continue and start to eat a pastry since I’m all out of strawberry ice cream.

“Fvck!” Chris exclaims, sitting straight up. “That explains everything!” they muses, gulping down what's left in their glass, having barely taken one sip out of it. Their eyes are bulging with information I’m dying to know. I wait impatiently as I see Chris computing this information, the eyeballs go back and forth like they are in the middle of REM-sleep. When the glass is empty they don’t tell me anything, but fill up the glass again.

“What?” I snap, having no more patience to give them.

“Sean had planned a big surprise engagement party for you in the park. We would all sing and do this dance number and you would end up under one of the big blooming cherry trees, and there he would ask you to marry him. It was so romantic, like a romcom. And then he goes around and… you know…”

Chris looks away, not wanting to bring back all the hurt I went through I guess. “We were all so surprised. All sorts of theories were out there. Most thought he had lost his mind. Others believed his parents got to him, you know how they are. You never were good enough for them, having no ambition of becoming a half drunk trophy wife, but a scientist who digs through mud for ugly trinkets you could buy,” Chris gives me a weak smile, still not meeting my eyes. It’s true what they say, Sean’s parents hated me with vigor.

“We never told you because you took it so hard without knowing about the proposal, and then you met Ben and got lucky twice. You do know how to pick them.” This time the smile is genuinely happy for me. “After you and Ben became a thing we all kind of forgot about Sean. He disappeared from our lives as well as our minds. Not like magic, but out of sight out of mind. When you texted that he was back I seriously had to think for a few seconds to remember him.”

“Wow,” I say, getting up and sitting down again. “I saw the engagement ring right before it happened. Right before he and that woman entered our home.” Drying my sad tears, it’s my turn to look away. “I never managed to tell anyone, because how could I be sure it was meant for me in the first place? I thought I had misjudged him so badly, so why should I have expected the ring to have been meant to me and not for someone else?”

“From what I understand, before that fvcking vampire woman came along, it was always only you. He only had eyes for you. Him being a handsome billionaire, a lot of women tried to throw themselves at him, but he ignored them, only wanting you.”

“And now he wants me back,” I tell them honestly.

“Sh!t, that’s some strong love there.” Chris sounds thoughtful. “Why isn't he searching for his Beloved?” I gasp when Chris utters the word ‘Beloved’ and I lose my grip on my glass. It falls to the floor, breaking to pieces and Sangria is splattered all over the kitchen. Ignoring the glass Chris raises their eyes as I clutches my heart. It’s thumping hard and I feel chills going through my body.

“What is a Beloved? Sean keeps calling me his Beloved.” I ask Chris, reaching for his hand. Chris only gapes back at me, not giving me any answers. “Please, what is a Beloved?” I repeat and he takes my hand. He takes a big breath before answering slowly.

“Um, how to say it short? It’s like his fated love. Vampires are extremely attracted to their Beloved and no one else will give them a fulfilling love life. Most vampires are obsessed with finding their Beloved, and some wait centuries for their fated loved one to show up. They use that time to go on and on about how much they are going to love and cherish this person, whoever it is. Some even start to collect gifts for their Beloved. When they have found the one and only they cannot get enough of them and some even lock themselves into towers shunning the world.” My eyes widen as Chris continues to talk. Not only is my ex a vampire, but according to him I’m his true love! How can this be?

“But he keeps attacking me, Chris. How can I be his Beloved if he only wants to hurt me?” I ask, almost too loud.

“Lorena, think! He. Is. A. Vampire…” Chris responds. “He drinks blood and is probably dying to take a good sip from you. And he probably wants to turn you into a vampire too.” I just stare at them, unable to comprehend what’s said.

“But I love Ben!” I exclaim. “I think.”