Love Me, Not My Body

CHAPTER 14

The bass pounded loudly from the speakers in the large room where the engagement party was being held. It was packed full of all of Tricia's and Fred's family and friends, which seemed to be half the state of Florida. It was an interesting mix of Fred's accountant friends and upper-class family and Tricia's former co-workers at Blue Hades and her current co-workers at her receptionist job.

There was a large dance floor which was constantly full. Scott had taken me out to dance to a few songs, but had since disappeared. Large, rectangular tables sprawled across the half of the room which was not occupied by the dance floor. I sat at one of them, sipping on sparkling water when Tricia approached.

"You can't look glum at my party," she drawled out in her Southern accent. "It's going to be bring the entire party down and Lord knows I can't have that."

I chuckled at her as she sat down beside me and threw her arm around my shoulders. "I'm just resting my feet. These heels are killing me."

She glanced down at my shoes and shook her head. "Beauty is pain, have you never heard that sweetie?"

I rolled my eyes. "Never in my entire life."

She laughed as she glanced away and waved at someone. "I think I'm being summoned." She gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze before standing up gracefully and waltzing away to whoever it was she had been waving too.

I sighed as I glanced around, trying to find Scott to no avail. I stood up and decided to go talk to some of the girls who worked at Blue Hades with me. It was fun seeing them outside of work, and we ended up having a blast dancing and talking together. I left them still on the dance floor and snuck away to the restroom quickly.

As I exited the restroom, I wandered along the back wall simply watching the party and feeling happy for my friend. I suddenly felt a hand grab my arm. I spun around and found Scott standing with a smile plastered on his face. My heart sank as his bloodshot eyes scanned me up and down. He had obviously disappeared to use drugs. Behind him stood Dominic, the owner of Blue Hades. He was well over six feet tall. He looked much older than his forty years, with wrinkles on his face and silver hair atop his head.

"Kendra, baby," Scott slurred out as he pulled me toward him. "Dominic and I were just talking about you."

I nervously glanced between them. "It's a small world."

He laughed as his hands slid onto my waist and he lowered his lips to my neck. "You taste so damn good, baby."

"Scott," I warned in a hushed voice. His hands slid down to my butt and I quickly tried to tug them off. "Scott, stop."

He laughed as he lifted his face to mine. "What's the matter, baby? You aren't proud of your man?"

I rolled my eyes. "Of course I am. I just don't want to have s*x with my man right here in front of everyone."

He bent back down to kiss my neck. "Not like everyone here hasn't seen it."

"Scott," I hissed out as he gripped my butt tightly. I slid my hands onto his chest and tried to push him away. "Stop."

"Just relax," Scott insisted as his fingers went to the hem of my dress and pulled upwards. "I'll be quick."

"Scott!" I said, my voice beginning to rise. "I told you to stop! I don't want..."

"Quit bitching," he snarled out as he pulled up harder on my dress. "If other guys can f**k my woman, so can I."

"No!" I screeched out as I desperately tried to hold my dress down. My voice, though louder, quickly got lost beneath the overpowering music as Dominic suddenly advanced toward us.

"I'd advise you to keep your voice down," he said in a calm voice as he stepped behind me.

Panic began to pound out from my heart and through my veins as I glanced between Dominic and Scott. Dread filled my stomach as I knew this wasn't good at all. Dominic's large hand suddenly slapped over my mouth and swung me around so I was facing the back wall. Scott's hands moved from the hem of my dress to between my legs. I screamed, but it was muffled with the hand over my mouth. His hands touched my thighs, running up them to my panties underneath. My hands shot down to his as I frantically tried to stop him. He slapped and fought my hands, trying to gain access.

"Kendra!" Scott snapped out as he tried to restrain my hand. "Stop being a f*****g whore."

He again yanked upwards on the hem of my dress and I quickly pulled it down. Frustration grew across his face at our battle when he suddenly grabbed the spaghetti straps of my dress. He yanked them off my shoulders and downward roughly. One of them snapped as Dominic tightened his grip over my mouth.

"Why don't we take this foray elsewhere?" Though Dominic spoke a question, it came out more as a firm statement.

Scott's eyes gleamed as he grinned hungrily at me. "Gladly."

"No!" I screamed in a muffled noise beneath Dominic's hand. I quickly began trying to hit and kick either one of them. I'm sure I looked like a thrashing octopus trying desperately to free myself. My foot made contact with Scott's shin and he cursed as he looked at me in fury.

"You stupid b***h!" he growled as his right fist came flying at me. It smashed into my left cheek as Dominic suddenly released his hand and my head snapped to the right.

I went flying to the side and down toward the ground in a freefall. My right eyebrow smashed into a table, flipping me over as I fell to the hard floor on my back. My head cracked onto the floor. Something warm suddenly spread over the right side of my forehead as tears of pain streamed from my eyes. My left cheek throbbed incessantly as though it was taking an invisible, non-stop beating. The back of my head throbbed as my trembling hand slowly raised to the warm liquid on my forehead. I touched it and brought my fingers to my eyes. They widened in horror when I saw them covered in blood.

Voices suddenly began ringing out and I tried to sit up. Hands pushed me back down and I looked panicked at them. Random people I didn't know hovered over me, telling me to relax and stay down. I looked at them in confusion over what was wrong. Was something wrong with me? Why did they look so panicked?

Tricia suddenly broke through the crowd, screaming for someone to call 911 as she ran over to me.

"Kenda!" she cried out as she sat down next to me in her dress. "What happened to you?"

The last couple minutes flashed before me. My eyes darted around the crowd but Dominic and Scott were nowhere to be seen.

"Kendra!" Tricia cried out again. "What happened?"

I turned toward her, wetting my lips as I tried to sit up again. "I just tripped in these stupid heels and hit my head. I'm fine."

"You are not fine!" she scoffed as she pressed me back down. "Just stay put. You have a nasty gash on your forehead, sweetie. We're going to get you help."

"I don't need help," I insisted.

"My God!" Scott's voice suddenly broke out above the others as he shoved through the crowd to me. "What happened baby?"

Tricia and I both turned toward him. The look of concern on his face was priceless. He was an amazing actor. He knelt beside me was though he was just as shocked as everyone else at my injuries that he had inflicted.

"She says she fell," Tricia said in a flat voice. "Were you not with her?"

"No," Scott replied. "I left to use the restroom." He turned toward me as he brushed my hair back from my forehead. I jerked away at his touch and a flash of anger crossed his face. There was no doubt he wanted to hit me again in that moment, but there were too many witnesses for him to get away with it this time. "You've always been so clumsy."

I glared at him as the chaos around me ensued. It was as if these people had never seen blood before.

Scott grabbed some nearby cloth napkins and pressed them to my bleeding forehead. I looked at him, my tears drying as my cheek still pounded with the memory of what he had done. His face was neutral as he held back any words with everyone around us.

"Thank goodness," Tricia breathed beside me. I turned toward her before following her gaze. I saw someone walking toward me with big black boots and the large, dark tan fireman pants on with a reflective strip at the bottom. Black suspenders hung on either side of the pants, discarded downward instead of up over the shoulders where they belonged. My eyes wandered upward, my heart beginning to pound with dread as my eyes took in the sight of the familiar dark blue shirt with the fire station emblem emblazoned upon it in white. My eyes continued their upward track to the fireman's face and lurched to a stop as soon as Preston's green eyes met mine. I saw the clear flash of anger and panic cross his face which was clearly visible with his brown, wavy hair tied up into a messy manbun.

"You gotta be f*****g kidding me," Scott remarked as I dropped my eyes downward. I was completely and totally ashamed of what had occurred and what Preston was now witnessing.

"What happened?" Preston asked in his British accent. His voice sounded restrained with anger.

"She was clumsy as usual and hit her head," Scott drew out as he pressed the napkin harder against my head. I winced at the pressure.

"Is that what happened?" Preston asked gently.

I lifted my eyes back up and my heart fluttered as he was crouched down, inches away from me. His concerned green eyes bore into my inner soul and I struggled harder than I ever have with the lie.

"What the hell, man," Scott said angrily beside me. "You don't believe me?"

"Yeah," I whispered out. "That's what happened. I tripped."

I could see the disappointment in Preston's eyes and it tore at my heart.

"Let's take a look," he instructed as he slowly raised his hand toward my face. He pushed Scott's hand away as he reached into a bag behind him. He ripped open a package of gauze and gently pressed it to my forehead. His other hand gently scooped up my hand and set it against the gauze on my forehead.

"Hold this here," he instructed in his accent as he glanced behind him. He held up a small flashlight and shined it in my eyes. "Look at me."

I shakily looked directly at him as he inspected my eyes with the light. He quickly switched it off and put it away.

"We'll need to take you in to get that closed up," he stated as he slowly raised his hand again and took control of the gauze. He pulled it back slightly to look at it before gently pressing it back on.

My heart began thudding as panic began to grow larger than my pain. I couldn't go to the hospital. I couldn't risk it again. I had been lucky the last time no one had figured it out.

"She doesn't need to go to the damn hospital," Scott growled out. "It's a cut. It will heal."

Preston turned toward Scott with annoyance. "I beg to differ. She needs medical attention..."

"She's fine." Scott's voice rose with his anger. His hand suddenly came toward my face and I flinched to the side.

He didn't hit me. Instead, he grabbed Preston's hand and pushed it away from my wound.

"Don't put your hands on me," Preston warned in an ice-cold voice.

"Or what?" Scott chuckled. "What are you going to do, fireman?" He threw his arms out to the side as though encouraging Preston to come at him while he taunted him.

Preston ignored the bait and turned back to me, gently placing the gauze back to my wound and applying medical tape over it to keep it in place.

"Get your hands off her," Scott demanded as he slapped Preston's hand away from me. He grabbed my arm and attempted to pull me up when Preston suddenly sprung to his feet.

Two more firemen came rushing at us, pressing Scott to the side. He yelled obscenities at them as they physically blocked him from me.

Preston knelt back down in front of me. His green eyes caught mine and held on. "We need to take you to the hospital to get your gash closed up."

Scott's shouts rang in my ears. His tone sent a cold chill down my spine. There was so much anger within it. I turned toward him, my breath coming out shaky as I recognized that hateful tone as the one he held whenever he laid his hands on me.

"Kendra," Preston's gentle voice called, but I was spellbound by Scott's anger. "Kendra," he repeated gently. "You need to go to the hospital with me."

I drew my eyes away from Scott and stared at Preston in a daze. I slowly shook my head. "I can't."

Preston looked hurt by my words as his eyebrows crushed down. "Why?"

"I don't want to go," I replied as Scott's voice suddenly stopped.

"You need medical treatment," Preston insisted.

"I'll be fine."

"You'll bleed out. You need it closed."

I turned toward Scott. Why was he suddenly silent? He stood behind the firemen with a look of rage pointed directly at me.

"Tell him you don't want to go, baby," he hollered at me. I could see the vein in his neck pulsing and I began to shake at the thought of all that rage taken out on me. Were he and Dominic planning to attack me again? What would they have done if it hadn't been stopped?

"Why can't you go?" Preston asked. I felt his fingertips graze my arm as he set one of the straps of my dress back onto my shoulder. The other still hung broken.

I shook my head, my attention on Scott. "I don't want to go. I'm fine."

"Tell me why," Preston insisted, impatience sounding in his tone.

I turned toward him. "I don't have insurance."

Scott's voice suddenly erupted again in a slew of curse words and I startled, my entire body jumping. My hand covered my cheek which shot out in pain from the movement.

Preston suddenly moved forward. He swept me into his arms as he lifted me up, cradling me protectively in his arms. "Its on me."

"Preston," I breathed out as I wrapped my arms around his neck for fear of falling.

"You need medical attention," he repeated as he carried me away. The crowd parted to make a path for him as I clung to him.

Halfway through the crowd, we met some paramedics who had apparently just arrived.

"I've got it handled," Preston told them. "We need a lift, though."

They replied, though I couldn't make out their words over the sounds of the crowd and the music still playing through the speakers. I turned my face into Preston's chest, fresh tears burning my eyes. Humiliation and pain seized through me in overwhelming proportions. He carried me with ease out the doors and into the night air. I lifted my face to see us approaching an ambulance behind a firetruck in the parking lot.

"Preston," I said, trying to put my feet down. "Preston stop. I can't go to the hospital."

"It will be alright," he assured me. "I'll pay the..."

"Its not just that," I cried out desperately as we reached the ambulance. "I can't. Please!"

He stopped walking and looked down at me. His green eyes searched over me with uncertainty. "Tell me why."

I stared up at him and desperately wanted to tell him everything. "I can't."

He sighed as he glanced up as the ambulance doors swung open.

"Preston please," I begged as I gripped him tighter.

I felt him move again and turned to see him step up into the ambulance. He set me down on the stretcher with my feet dangling over the edge. "Wait here," he instructed as he walked back toward the doors and jumped out of the ambulance.

I watched him talk to the EMT workers as my heart pounded nervously in my chest. My fingers fidgeted in my lap. He turned back toward me and stepped back into the ambulance. The other men closed the doors behind him. My breath caught as I leapt to my feet. They couldn't make me go!

"Relax," Preston drew out as he put his hands up. "We're not going to the hospital."

I looked at him in confusion. "Then where are we going?"

He sat down on the stretcher beside me and patted for me to sit next to him. I hesitantly sat down beside him. "We're going back to the station so I can fix you up." His voice seemed strained and heavier with his accent.

"Thank you." I turned my face to look at him.

He nodded as the ambulance suddenly moved. It lurched forward and I fell over into Preston. I quickly went to sit back up, but he put his arm around my shoulders and held me against him.

We were silent the entire drive. When the ambulance stopped, the other workers opened the back doors and Preston stood up and jumped down. He turned back and put his hands under my arms and gently lifted me down to the ground.

He pointed toward a door inside the station. "We'll head that way."

I nodded as I started walking in the direction he had pointed. I heard him talk to the men a moment before his footsteps hurried behind me.

"You owe me!" a male voice hollered behind us.

"Yeah yeah," he called back as he arrived beside me. He took a step in front of me and opened the door, holding it open for me.

"Thank you."

He nodded as I walked through the door and he quickly followed. He took my hand into his and led me down some hallways and through doors. My heart hammered at his touch in my chest. Would I ever stop feeling this way about him? Apparently, my stupid heart forgot he had a girlfriend and I was a worthless s*x toy to him.

We walked into a room which reminded me of a nurse's office in a school. Shelves hung on all the walls with various medical supplies and bandages. There was a sink and a long counter with jars of cotton balls and lozenges.

He gently lifted me atop the countertop before turning away to open a couple cabinets and drawers. I looked at my ripped strap and tried to somehow magically put it back together. I tried to tie it, but there wasn't enough fabric. I noticed the noise Preston had been making rummaging around had suddenly gone silent. I glanced up and was shocked to see him gone.

My fingers went down to the countertop with the intention of hopping down when he reentered the room. His fireman pants were gone, and now he wore his common black skinny jeans.He walked over toward me with a cream-colored suit jacket laid over his bent arm. It had black and gray floral and leaf design on it. My eyes lifted from the jacket to him as he approached me. He was silent as he lifted the jacket and opened it, laying it carefully over my shoulders. He turned away from me to grab the supplies he had gathered earlier. I slipped my hands through the sleeves of his jacket and wrapped it tightly around me. His smell wafted up from it and into my nostrils.

"Thank you," I whispered softly.

He nodded, his jaw clenched, as he put some liquid from a bottle onto a cotton ball. His eyes studied me carefully as he slowly raised his hand and took the tape and gauze off my forehead.

"This is going to sting," he said with an apologetic voice.

"Then why do it?" I asked lightly.

He grinned as he placed it against my cut, and I flinched at the pain. "I have to clean it." He grabbed another cotton ball and some more gauze. My eyes drifted away as the wound began to throb at his treatment. My cheek was still pounding. I started to raise my hand to touch it, but quickly stopped myself. I didn't want to draw attention to it. Hopefully I could leave before he noticed any mark there.

I felt more liquid on the wound, and then he pressed something onto it. He stepped to the side and began cleaning up the materials he had used.

"I glued it shut," he said as he picked up. "It will dissolve on its own, so no follow-up is required. Leave the steri-strip on until it falls off. Keep it dry for twenty-four hours."

I nodded as he again left the room. This time, I didn't attempt to move. I sat and patiently waited for him to re-enter a moment later with an icepack in his hand. He walked over to me but went to my left side instead of the right side where the gash was. I looked at him in confusion as he lifted the icepack to my left cheek.

"How did this happen?" he asked. His voice was deeper with an undercurrent of anger within it. His normally soft, gentle face had a new hardness to it.

The ice pack felt heavenly on my throbbing cheek. "I must have hit it when I..."

"Don't," he interrupted me. "Don't lie to me about this."

I looked at him silently as his green eyes bore into me. He wet his lips as he took a deep breath.

"Do you want to stay here tonight?"

I sat speechless for a moment in confusion. "Here? At the fire station?"

He nodded. "I'm in the middle of a shift. I can't leave."

My eyes narrowed slightly on him. "What will your girlfriend have to say about that?"

His lips pulled into a thin line as he studied me. "I'm allowed to have a girlfriend, Kendra."

"I never said you couldn't," I quipped back as I hopped down from the counter. The icepack slipped from my cheek from my movement and he lowered it to his side. "I should go." I turned to walk out of the room and he quickly called my name.

"Kendra! Kendra don't go. Please."

I turned back toward him. "Thank you for all your help, Preston." I pulled the jacket open and began to take it off. "I truly appreciate it, but I should go now."

He quickly strode over to me and grabbed the lapels of the jacket and pulled it back around me.

I lifted my face to his as he looked down upon me. His green eyes searched me, and for one stupid moment I thought he was going to kiss me.

"Let me call you a car," he stated instead.

I pointed with my thumb over my shoulder. "There's a bus stop a few blocks away."

He shook his head as his eyebrows pressed together to create creases between them. "You don't need to ride the bus this late."

I gave him a weak, forced smile as my fingers gently touched his chest. "I'll be alright, Preston. I'm a big girl."

He looked with indecision at me as he opened his mouth to speak, but I quickly filled the space between us with words before he could.

"A walk would be good for me right now." I raised my hands toward my head. "Clear my head and everything."

His green eyes saddened as he held the ice pack out to me. "Okay."

I took the ice pack from him, my fingers grazing his and causing an unsettling spark within me. My eyes quickly darted up to his to see if he, too, was affected but the look of sadness never lifted.

I turned away from him and walked out of the room. I found my way back outside and into the still warm night. Tears burned my eyes as I began walking toward the bus stop.

I placed the ice pack against my bruised cheek as I mentally berated myself. Why couldn't I accept his help? Why was I so hard headed and stubborn sometimes? Because he was getting too close to my secrets?

No. It wasn't that. It was my fear of him getting hurt because of what I ran from in my past. He wouldn't be the first to suffer or die at their hands. I wouldn't let them hurt him.