The Taste of Forgotten Love (Rated R-18) [COMPLETED]

The Plan

"What happened to my son?! Langdon! Langdon! Cahil, what happened to your brother?!"

Niyakap lang ni Cahil ang umiiyak na ina bago ito inalalayan palayo sa emergency room kung saan nilalapatan ng paunang lunas ang kapatid. Ipinaliwanag niya rito ang kalagayan ni Langdon.

She got a call from Keon that they were in the hospital. Her brother is apparently figured in a minor accident.

"Ilang beses ko na siyang pinagsabihan na iwan na ang post niya sa pamilya but he still wanted to do it. I don't care if he'll go to States and never come back. Mas mabuti na iyon kaysa malaman kong halos ihambalang na niya ang sarili niya rito kay Nathan. It's as good as death."

Naupo sila. Hawak niya pa rin nang mahigpit ang malamig na kamay ng ina.

"Tell me, Cahil. Nagkamali ba ako ng desisyon nang ipakasal ang kuya mo kay Yvonne? Did he already love that girl back then or was he still in love with his dead girlfriend? God, what kind of mother I am? Ni hindi ko alam ang nangyayari sa aking mga anak!"

Humugot siya ng malalim na hininga kasabay ang pagsungaw ng guilt sa dibdib. "I don't know, ma. Kasalanan ko rin. I pushed for his marriage because I hate the thought of being arranged to be married first. I hate the idea of not marrying the only man I've ever loved."

Natigilan ang ina na agad na idinantay ang kamay sa mukha ng bunsong anak para itaas ito. Cahil met her mother's gaze and smiled sadly. Napasinghap si Magda nang mapagtanto ang ibig sabihin ng anak.

"No, no. My darling. No, please. Please, don't do this to me. Don't slip away from me, Cahil. I know you love him but he's an enemy, my daughter."

Naitakip nito ang kamay sa bibig nang maluha na naman pero sa pagkakataong ito ay mas lamang ang takot kaysa pag-aalala.

"Cahil..."

Cahil stood up and tapped her mother's shoulder. She tried to sound firm amidst the drumming pain in her heart.

"Ma, don't worry about me. I won't take after kuya. I love you so much to be your second pain. Dito ka lang muna. I... I just have to make a call. Kuya will be discharged any minute from now. I just have to check on something."

Halos takbuhin na niya ang exit ng ospital para lang makalayo rito. Bigla na lang kasing gusto niyang maiyak pero hindi niya iyon maaaring gawin sa harap ng ina.

Nang marating ang kotse ay hindi na niya nagawang makapasok. She broke down in front of it. Bumagsak ang mukha niya sa sariling kamay.

She cried and cried—silently at first until she didn't care anymore about people hearing and seeing her in this state and started sobbing loudly.

Kanina ay nakita niya si Nathan sa ospital. May plano ito na hindi na naisakatuparan dahil nandoon siya.

The man she loves looked at her earnestly as if he wanted to pull her into his arms but just like her, he can't do something about it proving the blinding truth of war and marriage that tore them apart. They were just a few meters from each other but it felt like they were miles asunder.

She's still longing for him and she knows he still loves her but that stops right there. Frustratingly, they can't act on it.

They are both paralyzed by the century-old hate that cut them in this time so they had to act like strangers.

Bakas pa rin ang pagmamahal sa mukha nito para sa kaniya at alam niyang pareho ang nababasa nito sa mga mata niya.

And then she froze in her feet when she saw how his eyes turned feral when he looked at her brother before he walked away.

Tumingala siya sa kalangitan at napahikbi nang malakas. Ang hapdi ng dibdib niya.

"I'm sorry, Cin. I'm really sorry for what Langdon did to you and to your baby. I'm sorry for failing to fulfill my promise to you. I'm sorry I can't be with your brother anymore."

She will always feel more sorry for Nathan and Alcindra knowing what irreparable damage Langdon did to them.

"IT WAS just an accident, ma. Lasing ako kaya hindi ko na-safety lock ang baril. Besides, it's just a scratch. Galos lang ito. Malayo sa bituka."

Hindi makapaniwalang napahilamos na lang ng mukha si Magda pagkarinig sa sagot ng panganay.

"Langdon, what did I ever do wrong as your mother for you to do this? Scratch? Is it really just a scratch? You have several stitches! I wouldn't call it just a scratch!"

Umupo ito sa kama at hinaplos ang mukha niya. "Please go to the States just like I told you. Mas matatanggap ko pa na malayo ka sa akin kaysa makita kang halos nagpapakamatay na. Being the head of the security system of the clan will kill you. Ako na ang bahala sa abuelos, okay? Go now, Langdon. Do it for me, for your mother, my son."

Tinanggap niya ang yakap ng ina bago pinilit ang sariling tumawa.

"Ma, you're making me seem like a teenager. I'm an adult who's capable of doing the job. I can handle this. Trust me," pagkumbinsi niya rito. "I wanted to do this. Badly. I am meant for this."

Napatitig na lang ito sa kaniya bago unti-unting nanlaki ang mga mata sa magkahalong gulat at galak.

"Don't tell me... Don't tell me that you've wanted the highest position in the la familia this time?" Napalitan ng excitement ang kalungkutan nito kanina.

He fell silent for a moment and went back to his conversation with Cas earlier.

"I knew you're alive," he said and smiled happily at her.

He took in her appearance. Pinutol man nito ang buhok at nawala man ang pag-ibig sa mukha nito pero ang pamilyar na pintig ng puso niya ang nagsasabing narito na nga sa harap niya ang kasintahan.

Nagpumilit siyang tumayo sa kabila ng sakit. He wanted to hug her. He needed to feel her warmth to confirm that it's not just his dream.

God, he desperately wants to touch her!

"You're alive! You're really alive, Cas!"

But she quickly shut him off when she shot his arm for the second time. Daplis lang pero mas masakit kaysa unang putok. He grunted in searing pain and blood came gushing out of his flesh.

"Cas..." he whispered while writhing in agony on the ground.

She responded through her cold distant eyes. Natigilan siya sa kalamigan nito.

She shot him without hesitation but for some reason, her anger hurt him more than the bullet.

"I said don't call me with that name! Wala na ang Cas na kilala mo! Nawalan ka na rin ng karapatang tawagin ako sa pangalang iyan, Asturia! You killed my cousin! You killed Alcindra!" she hysterically said and pointed the gun at his leg.

"I admit I was blinded by my rage, Cas. But what could I do? They killed you. They killed you and our baby!"

"So you have to kill her? You have to kill an innocent girl?! You have to kill your baby with her, too? Hindi mo ba alam Langdon na si Alcindra lang ang tanging dahilan kung bakit ako nabubuhay bago pa kita makilala? She's my Alcindra! Our Alcindra! But look what you've done! Tingnan mo kung paano mo kami pagdusahin!"

Her voice broke and the tears pooled in her eyes but they never flowed out.

"Alam kong mali ang ginawa ko. I'm sorry... I'm so, so sorry. I know saying sorry is not enough. It can't undo anything I've done."

He tried to stand up despite the paralyzing ache.

"What do you want me to do, Cas? Sabihin mo sa akin. I'll do anything. I promise I will do anything to atone for my sins for Alcindra, for the woman I killed."

Tumalikod ito at bumuntunghininga. Nang humarap ito ay bawas na ng kaunti ang kaninang galit.

"You really want to be forgiven? Then do something. Ibalik mo sa amin ang lahat ng ninakaw niyo sa pamilya ko. Everything from our distillery to our forest. Alam kong iyon din ang gustong mangyari ni Alcindra, Langdon. She may have chosen to spend her several months with you but I know she will always choose us this time. She'll choose to protect our family."

Nabuhayan siya ng loob sa narinig. "Really? You think so? Is this what Alcindra would have wanted? If so, I will do it. I'll give back all the properties. Gagawin ko ang lahat para ipakita na nagsisisi ako sa ginawa ko kay Alcindra."

May dumaang sakit sa mata nito bago isiniksik ang baril sa gilid ng pantalon na para bang sanay na sanay na ito. Malayo sa mahinhing Casindra na nakilala niya noon.

"Patunayan mo sa akin na nagsisisi ka talaga. Hindi sapat na kabayaran sa mga kinuha mo sa amin ang iilang piraso lang ng daliri mo."

Mabilis siyang sumang-ayon. "Alam ko. I'd do everything for Alcindra this time. I don't deserve her forgiveness but I promised her that I will protect the things that are dear to her. Kung ibig sabihin niyon ay pagtalikod sa angkan ko, gagawin ko. Gagawin ko ang lahat Casindra para kay Cin."

She smirked in a bitter fashion before lifting her head to the sky and letting out a long sigh.

"Got me thinking how unlucky you are. Ni isa sa dalawang anak mo ay walang nabuhay. Namatay ang anak natin, samantalang pinatay mo naman ang anak niyo ni Alcindra. If only I could go back in the past, I would never, ever agree to Cin."

Naging seryoso ang mukha niya nang mabalik sa kasalukuyan.

"If I want the post, will you support me, ma?"

She cupped his chin and nodded in euphoria, anticipation all over her face.

"Langdon, all my life, I dedicated myself to raising someone who will lead our family to the top. Your father saw that in you that's why he sacrificed his life for you. Kapag nagdesisyon kang kunin ang nararapat sa iyo, hindi ako mangingiming gawin ang lahat para makuha mo ang pangarap ng pamilya natin. Your father paved the way and it's my turn now to help you. Until now, many in our clan cannot accept Luca as the leader. We'll take advantage of that. I still have the gravitas as the widow of your father. We will use it to gain strong support inside."

Animo bigla itong nabuhayan ng lakas. Nawala ang katamlayan at umaliwalas ang mukha na mahigpit na hinawakan ang kamay niya.

"This is what I've been waiting for the longest time, my son. Ang tuluyan kang magising. You deserve to be the next leader. Who cares if you're not the firstborn son in the family? Hindi namamana ang talento ng pagiging isang pinuno. You are made for it and I'll make sure that you'll make it."

Tumayo ito sa kama at kinuha ang cellphone pero bago ito umalis ay binalikan siya para yakapin uli at halikan sa noo.

"I'm so proud of you, Langdon. And I'm sure, your father looks down on you right now with pride too. I need to make a call. I'll be back and oh, don't say anything to anyone about what happened tonight."

Sighing, he collapsed back into the bed and closed his eyes. Doon lumitaw sa isip niya ang mukha ng galit na si Casindra.

"Please believe me when I say that I understand your hatred. I hate myself, too. I wasn't able to protect you and our baby. I also killed Cin and our baby. Walang kapatawarang naghihintay sa akin. Wala akong kuwentang tao. I don't deserve to live anymore. I'm not trying to ask for forgiveness Cas because I don't deserve it but please know that I'm..." his voice cracked, "... really really sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I don't know how it happened but I'm so happy to see you alive. Gustong-gusto kitang yakapin ngayon. Dati ay nagkakaroon lang ako ng ganitong pagkakataon kapag nananaginip ako pero ngayon ay totoo na. Nandito ka talaga sa harap ko at buhay na buhay."

Ngunit wala itong naging reaksiyon. Blanko ang mata na kanina ay muhi lang ang nakasalamin.

"You're right. You are one unforgivable human being, Asturia. You deserve every prick of pain and misery you're feeling so please, continue feeling that way. Hindi ako masaya na nakita kang buhay. It's more acceptable that way dahil pinapakulo mo lang ang dugo ko ngayon. I don't know what I saw in you. I regretted that I loved you, that you were once a father to my child. Look what you've become now. A murderer of my own blood."

Naputol lang ang daloy ng mga pangyayari nang pumasok si Cahil sa silid niya. Her eyes were red obviously from crying but he doubted it's because of what happened to him.

"Don't ask if I'm okay. Don't even ask me if something happened. You already know the answers." Tumuwid ito ng tayo at sinalubong ang nakakaunawang mata niya. "I'll head on. Nakapagpaalam na ako kay mama. Sana ay hindi na ito maulit, kuya. Fix your life and don't drag me or our family into your mess again. It's pretty tiring and disappointing."

He just gave her sister a smile. "Take care. Thank you for coming."

Pinasadahan muna nito ng tingin ang sugat niya bago ito tumalikod.

"Cahil," he called for her name before he was able to stop himself.

Tumigil ito pero hindi siya nilingon.

"Why aren't you asking me about it? Keon told me. Alam kong alam mo na may anak kam—"

"Stop it," she snapped. "Please, just stop it." She breathed hard. "Hindi ko kayang tanungin ang sariling kapatid ko kung bakit niya nagawa ang karumal-dumal na bagay na iyon. I don't want to hear any of your excuse or denial. Don't ever bring this up again if you wanted to keep the little respect I have for you."

Pigil ang luha na tuluyan na siyang iniwan nito. Langdon bowed his head and took out his wallet from his pocket. Binuksan niya ito at hinaplos ang mukha ni Alcindra sa picture na pinadevelop niya mula sa cellphone nito.

She's got an eye for taking photos. Puno ng mga tanawin ang gallery nito. Sunsets, sunrises, moon, and forests, books, the flowers he gave her. Puro ganoon.

Pero may mga naligaw namang mga tao. Mostly it was her stolen photos of him. There are some that they were together on the floor, on the carpet while he's sleeping. He remembered that moment as if it was just yesterday.

Iisa lang ang picture ng mukha nito na ngayon ay dala-dala niya saan man siya magpunta.

"I promise that I'll do what is right, Cin. For you."

Ibinalik niya ang wallet sa bulsa at tumayo para simulan na ang nabubuong plano.