First Blood: The Perfect Mistress

CHAPTER 5

I returned to my bed and stripped the robe from my body. Every time I opened the diary, I would read it till the last entry. By the time it’s finished, that’s when my mind would refresh, and I could continue doing the things I loved such as sailing on a yacht. I got a friend from AZ Group who owned a yacht, and Alejandro’s cousin has an island tucked somewhere in the waters near Mactan. Sometimes, he would take me to the island but most of the time, we would just go fishing. It was fun, and Alejandro was fun to be with; however, it’s more fun to read my mother’s diary.

Once again, I opened it and continued reading on her next entry while listening to Hyolyn’s music in the background. There were few entries left and excitement rushed through me while I was near to the last entry.

February 25, 2012

Dear Diary,

I resumed working to keep myself busy but it was difficult. It was challenging to meet our common friends in the hall of Anderson Tower. I and Lance conjugally owned the building according to the papers. However, Lance didn’t spend even a single centavo when it was built. Now, that he wanted some space, I was worried that he would ask me to divide our properties. We had no prenuptial agreement, and it would be unfair to me and Cassie!

No, I couldn’t allow him to take what was never his in the beginning. By all means, I should protect whatever belongs to me and my daughter. He shouldn’t consider taking it from me or he would suffer the consequences. Currently, the building was valued at 350M and I’m not stupid to let him and Rachel enjoyed the fruits of my investment!

Never!

It wouldn’t matter anymore if my world has crumbled because of his affair. As the days passed by, I came to realize that our brain was far more superior to our heart. However, if the heart suffered a sudden blow, everything lost its meaning!

February 26, 2012

I tried to be cool about our separation but when Cassie asked her father’s whereabouts, I was stunned. I was speechless! At that moment, I realized that I couldn’t let him go no matter what! My daughter needed him more than I do.

So I sent him a message!

I saw him typing a response then he stopped. I waited for almost thirty minutes and I assumed that it was a long message to apologize.

“I’m already happy with Rachel,” he said and I couldn’t believe and re-read the message at least a hundred times or until it sinks into me. Then another message came that says he’s sorry.

He apologized but I couldn’t accept it!

I looked up at the ceiling and blinked my eyes to stop the tears from coming out, but they still flowed abundantly. Tears blurred my vision but I used to be a keyboard warrior and begged him to reconsider his decision.

“Let’s break up, Adrianna.”

I covered my face with my hands and cried until my eyes became dry.

No more tears.

Just hatred for the man I considered to be my world!

“Did you ever love me?” I asked because I refused to believe that the love we shared for years vanished into thin air instantly.

“Yes, I did. I also don’t know what happened, but one day, I woke up, and I don’t love you anymore. I used to love you so much and you know that.

“Bullshit, Lance! Do you take me as a fool? True love would never fade, and you also know that. No, you didn’t love me, you’re just comfortable with me, or the kind of life I can give you.” I told him before enumerating the comforts he enjoyed while he’s with me. It was childish, I knew, but I was suffering because of his betrayal.

“If I didn’t love you, we will not be together for several years,” he reasoned out.

I smirked at his response because seriously, all these years, Lance was seldom home and I had to lie to Cassie about his non-existent conference or forum somewhere far away. For a few minutes, we exchanged harsh words.

I blamed myself, I blamed him, and then I blamed Rachel!

February 27, 2012

Dear Diary,

I woke up feeling empty without Lance by my side. Supposedly, I should get used to it but it’s not that easy! As soon as I opened my eyes, I searched for my phone and immediately typed a message for Lance.

I apologized for the harsh words I said to him last night. I stooped so low and called his mobile number. I thought he wouldn’t pick up but he did, and I was excited to hear his voice again.

“Maybe we shouldn’t talk anymore,” he said.

“No way! There will be no major changes in our relationship aside from that the fact that you don’t love me anymore.”

He laughed, and my heart bled once again. I knew what I was doing. I wanted him back so I swallowed my pride. Lance and I agreed to be in an open relationship. I asked him for it. It felt like I groveled on his feet and begged him to come home. I didn’t care anymore! I wanted him back and I was willing to compromise.

However, things got complicated when I saw Rachel’s status on social media. How did I know Rachel? She worked with Lance as his secretary but I just learned that they used to be lovers. She created an account in my husband’s name. Can you imagine how she insulted me?

The profile was public and everyone could leave a comment, so I leave one of mine after seeing her post that she wanted to live a happy and stress-free life. I balled my fist before typing my comment. It was a little mean, but I was entitled to be mean to her!

Lance saw my comment and became furious. He defended Rachel.

“Please stop harassing her!” He said and I cried.

April 22, 2012

Dear Diary,

It’s been a while! However, I can’t seem to write these days. I’m super busy with paper works. I had to secure everything for my daughter, and to hell with Lance. About the annulment papers? Hmmm, I decided not to give Rachel the chance to feel that she’s the winner. She could rot in poverty along with Lance because he wouldn’t get anything from me!

June 2, 2012

Dear Diary,

I am so happy today because my plan works and he comes home! Isn’t that amazing? I have to go. Gonna cook something special for dinner!

June 5, 2012

Dear Diary,

I’m so confused right now. He’s physically home but mentally absent. I thought that his relationship with Rachel was over. I was wrong. Last night, I heard him talking to her on the phone. The wind was unusually chilly but he stayed on the rooftop. He held the phone in his right hand, and the other has a cigarette. I spied on him, and then I saw how happy he was while talking with Rachel.

June 13, 2012

Dear Diary,

I confronted him about it. He lied to my face. What a scoundrel!

Maybe it’s time to stop this nonsense! So, with an attitude of I don’t care who I lose anymore, I talked with him about it. He was angry when I called Rachel as his mistress, a homewrecker and a slut.

“Did you really expect me to be kind to her? Not in this life or the next!” For the first time, I shouted at my husband, and he was shocked to see that the refine Adrianna Jones – Anderson knew how to fight with words!

“Please…just stop it! What’s wrong with you? Rachel didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me who wanted her back and pursued her. It’s all on me, Adrianna!”

“How dare you!” The slap must be painful because he glared at me after that.

“I’ll stay until your birthday, after that, we shouldn’t talk anymore. No, don’t cry honey, because you’ll be wasting your tears. You just don’t know how Rachel convinced me to reconcile with you,” he said.

“And you believe that b***h? You’re as crazy as her! If she really wanted us to reconcile, then she wouldn’t entertain an asshole like you! Go ahead, be happy with her, but please be informed that I’d rather cut my hand than signing the annulment papers! Rachel will forever be your mistress, Lance! Don’t you forget that!”

“I tried but I just can’t love you anymore. You’re mean and vicious. This is my warning to you. Stop harassing her, stop talking to me, just stop and don’t do anything!”

He chose Rachel over me.

It hurts.

“Go on. I can love myself better than you do,” I tried to salvage my pride for the last time.

June 20, 2012

Dear Diary,

The hurtful words he said to me were embedded into my memory and no matter how hard I tried to forget it, I could still hear it. True to his words, he didn’t leave and stay with us. He promised to stay until my birthday for Cassie’s sake, that’s what he said.

One morning, I insisted to our housekeeper that I should be the one cooking. I needed something to keep me occupied and doing chores would be a good diversion. Then he came into the kitchen, and my heart raced like crazy.

“Morning hon,” I greeted him like usual.

“Just call me Lance starting today,” he announced and I arched my eyebrows at his sudden changes.

I was hurt but I couldn’t let him know that. I couldn’t let him know that I was dying inside. “Sure if you say so,” I agreed. “Why are you here?”

“Let’s sell the house,” he replied.

“Why?”

“It’s just right to dispose of it,” he replied and I nodded.

“I see, but it’s going to be difficult to dispose of it right now, you know the market. Do you really have to go this far?”

“I have no choice. You hurt her, and that hurt me too. We can’t continue being like this, Adrianna.” He explained in a shaky voice. It must have been hard to choose Rachel over his family but he made a choice.

“Honey…,” my voice shook a little while trying not to cry. However, his words felt so heavy in my heart.

“Don’t call me that anymore,” he reminded me.

I could no longer control the sobs from escaping my mouth. I shook my head and refused to heed his reminder. “No, I’m used to it, “I said but I cried so much that I choke on my words.

“Don’t cry. I don’t like you to cry. After all, it’s your fault.”

July 14, 2012

Dear Diary,

It’s my birthday today and he never greeted me! Well, it shouldn’t matter anymore. I decided that on my special day, I will end everything with Lance. I may have a shortcoming as a wife, but dear, I knew I did everything I could in my power to satisfy him and to make him happy.

I loved him so much and he was my world. Everything revolved around him and it has to stop.

I need to live in the present.

I know it’s going to be challenging especially when I lived with for sixteen years but I’m sure I can manage. I know myself better than anyone else and there’s Cassie, she’s going to be the anchor of my strength.

I’m not the only woman who lost a husband to a mistress. There were others and if they managed to rebuild themselves, I believe that I can also do it.

I need to put some credit to my self-confidence and self-esteem during the process. At first, I felt insecure towards the other woman, but it’s no longer the case.

Love, Lies, and betrayal could be experienced accordingly. I should have never settled for less. All this time, my parents were right that my relationship with Lance wouldn’t last long because I loved him more than he loved me. They said that it should be the man who should love more in a relationship and I learned it the hard way.

After a moment of realization, I took a deep breath and proceed to the rooftop with a cup of coffee in my hand.

I know that he’s at the rooftop too!

As always, my hands trembled when I read the last sentence on her entry. It was her last entry on the diary. If I didn’t know any better, I would probably ask for an explanation.