Death Wish

Act III - Father

Jin Suk still pacing out on the floor, unable to release any emotion or even shed a tear. He is like a living figure with no soul that can be seen from the inside, he is like a statue that can show and express their feelings from the outside but not from the inside. There was no meaning to it, it's just all a worn-out lifeless body of his.

Devastated, he looks up at the ceiling bending his neck like a dead chicken hanging without life in its eyes. He finally gains his senses back, he remembered that his father was at home. The news about his mother passing away must be passed down to his father, he had the right to know because he was the husband. He doesn’t want to know what was happening in that room but he needs to do so, no matter how complicated the situation is.

He gulps and his eyes were twitching, he stood up despite his knees growing weak. He grabs onto the table counter to help himself and was finally able to stand up properly. By concealing all the emotions that are currently wearing him down was put aside inside him, he was free to move his body without a problem after letting all his emotions go away.

He ran upstairs to tell his father, he steps on the stairs with a heavy weighing him down as he was holding onto the railing to help himself lift his heavy foot. He was at the front of the slightly open door and was hesitating to open it. He close his eyes, took a deep breath as he was holding on to the doorknob. The sound of a woman in pain and his father’s groan was entering into his ears, it was too flagrant for him to face.

He closes his eyes and looks away then slowly opens the door. The two in bed didn’t notice anything because of the action and blatant sounds they were making. The door was wide open and Jin Suk was standing there for several seconds before they have noticed.

His father and the woman immediately covered themselves with the thick white blanket after knowing that Jin Suk was at the front door standing still with his head looking at the sideways trying to avoid seeing them together.

“Jin Suk-ah? What are doing here? Didn’t you say you’re going to accompany your mom tonight?”, His dad said covering the woman and trying hard to hide her when Jin Suk already knows what was happening. Jin Suk was silent and don’t know what to say, the anger inside him is kicking in and he is afraid that he will lose his calm if he open his mouth. He bites his lips so hard that it bleeds and crumpled his pants trying to control himself. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”, his father asked. Jin Suk was teary-eyed but he keeps pushing it back and he was still silent. “Stop biting your lips, your bleeding? Tell me what’s wrong, son?”, his father once again, he was unable to comfort his son closed because of his current situation.

Knowing that his son wasn’t looking, he grabs a towel from the cabinet and wrap himself up. He approached his son and puts his hand on his shoulder, “Come on son? What’s wrong?”, he said as he keeps glancing at the bed to make sure that the woman wasn’t doing anything that will be suspicious, he thought that Noh Jin Suk didn’t know anything. He looks at his father with anger in his eyes as tears slide down his cheeks. His eyes were red and his face was warm, it was soaked with tears and sweat. He gritted his teeth and was trembling, he wants to tell him but he was afraid that all the emotions that were bottling inside him will cause harm.

He keeps crumpling his hands and he was trembling, “Come on son? What’s wrong with you!?”, his father wabbled him so the words in his mouth will spit out. “Mom is dead”, a small voice has flown into the airs of his father, Jin Suk finally spoke. “What?”, his father’s eyebrow crumpled and what he heard was not what he expected from him, “What did you say?”, he asked. Jin Suk gulps as he tightens his grip on his pants. He looks at his father in the eyes with his weary and reddish eye, “Mom is gone”, he looks away, “Mom passed away just now”, he ended.

His father removed his hands and couldn’t believe what he heard from his son, he looks straight blankly as if he became a robot. He turned around and sat on the bed, he was in a complete daze. Jin Suk looks at him with despise in his eyes as he gritted his teeth. He can feel the enormous anger toward his father as if he was about to go violent. He can hear a ringing sound in his ears and veins was popping on his forehead. He was awfully red.

Jin Suk tries cannot to control himself anymore, he wants to stay put but he can’t. All he can do is leave and run outside. He run, run, run into the cold dark night with his empty mind full of hatred, sorrow, despair, fear, and all the negative things that were injected into his mind. The white bright lights inside the space of his mind had become a cold pitch-black space full of agony.

He reaches a place unknown to him. There was a pond, a big oak tree that look like it age a hundred years ago, and a little old bridge made of cement that can collapse anytime. Jin Suk has found himself in a place that can sympathize with his feelings. A dark place where a big oak tree is covering the beauty of the moonlight. A perfect place where he can release all of his emotions at once.

His eyes began to create small little droplets again and slide on his cheek as he look into the oak tree with small relief in his eyes. He walks slowly and sat in the shade of the big oak tree. He put his hand on his knees and cover his face looking down at the ground fall of dried leaves. The dried leaves were watered with his tear and there he finally let a sound, the sound of crying after losing a loved one.

He screams out of despondency and cried loudly knowing that no one will hear him. He grips onto the dried leaves crushing it with his rough hands, he throws them away and continued as a child. He continued to sob as the moon was covered with the thick grey cloud blocking its mesmerizing moonlight. It became darker, unable to see anything with bare eyes. Jin Suk didn’t even bother, he opened his eyes and saw nothingness, just like how you described his life now.

He stood up and walk like as he was drunk, he was already exhausted and was about to fall out of his consciousness. The light of the moon came back and shines brightly on certain where the old bridge is located. He saunters and went to the old bridge then stops at the middle. He slowly raised his head looking at the bright round moon and closed his eyes as a tear slips out.

His head was spinning and he feels sleepy as if his mind is slowly falling into darkness. His consciousness is about to shut down at any second and his knees have become weak and his knees became wobbly. The back of his ache hurts as if someone was poking his brain from the inside. He was getting out of balance, he was going to fall. His body finally gave up and he bowls over the handrailing of the bridge. He drop on the pond and slowly fell to the bottom, all he can see is the moonlight penetrating the water and gentle dancing bokeh. He drowns in the dark cold pond, he wanted to give up everything by dying. He closed his eyes and accepted his fate.

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[End of Act III - Father]

[Next Act - Allies]