HLS 1: Loving Kydel Shaun Aragon

Kabanata 8

I have these feelings that I already met my parents. But somehow I couldn't remember when and where. Isa pa'y parang may nagsasabi sa aking nasa malapit lamang sila, but still I don't know how to reach them.

"I think kailangan nating magpahinga saglit. Pitong oras na tayong nasa biyahe, Kydel." I heard Yuki's voice.

Dagli akong lumingon sa passenger seat kung saan nakaupo si Yuki. She was busy admiring the view outside. She even put her hand out of the window to feel the wind.

"Yeah, I think so too." Tugon ko bago saglit pang nagmaneho.

Two days after the party nakipag-usap ako kay Mr. Montecillo. Tinulungan naman ako ni Yuki pati na rin ng kaibigan nitong si Delancee. Noong una ay hindi pumayag si Mr. Montecillo sa pakiusap namin, pero nang biglang umiyak ang anak nito sa harap na siyang ikinagulat namin ay walang kaabog-abog na pumayag ito. It wasn't in our plan, but thanks to that, wala kaming iisipin ngayon habang nasa biyahe papuntang Pagudpod.

Isang store ang aming tinigilan. Nakaharap iyon sa dagat. It's beautiful and perfect. Napakapayapa lalo pa't kakaunti lamang ang dumadaan kaya mas naririnig namin ang hampas ng mga alon kaysa sa tunog ng mga sasakyan.

"Hindi ba unfair kay Mr. Castro mo na hinahanap mo ngayon yung Mom mo?" Tanong ni Yuki na ikinatingin ko sa kaniya.

I forgot, I haven't told her about my Dad; Dwayne. Hanggang ngayon ay malinaw pa rin sa akin ang naging komprontasyon namin ni Dad kagabi. He was sorry, yet he doesn't want to help me look for my real family. That's kinda f****d up, but yeah, I guess he still have grudges to my real dad.

-

It was ten in the evening when I decided to go home. I only changed my clothes, go out of my condo and went to my Dad's house afterwards. I need to know everything directly from him. Although I already read the informations sent by the private investigator I hired, I still want to ask dad about my real parents. I want to know his reasons, and maybe I would understand why he did all these things to me.

When I got to his house, it was grandma who welcomed me. Kakalabas lamang pala nito kahapon ng hospital. Uncle Ryte wasn't home, he's currently at Australia managing some of his businesses.

"Where's dad?" I asked after giving a peck on grandma's cheek.

I looked at her. I kinda felt sad knowing that she isn't my real grandma. She was kind to me. She treated me as if I am his own grandson.

"Nasa library," maiksing sagot ni grandma.

"Alright, I'll go talk to him." Sagot ko bago akmang maglalakad paakyat ng hagdan nang pigilan ako ni grandma.

Grandma smiled at me. "Don't hate Dwayne, Kydel. He just fell in love and couldn't bring himself to tell your mom the truth about you."

So, she knew about this? All my life, they knew about who are my real parents?

I don't know what to react. I don't know what to say. I slowly hold grandma's face with my own two hands. "I'm trying not to, grandma. I just want to talk to him," I said and kissed her forehead.

Naabutan ko si Dad na nakayuko sa ilang papeles na nakalatag sa kaniyang table. He's busy, I can see that. But that won't stop me from wanting to know the whole truth about myself.

"I found them," I said.

I saw how my dad flinch. He clenched his fist while holding the piece of paper he was reading. He looked at me with shock on his face. "Them?" He asked.

Mataman kong tinitigan si Dad; ni hindi ko magawang kumurap. I'm starting to feel my anger. I want to know everything and get out of this house at once.

"Yes, I found them." Malamig kong sabi na siyang ikinakurap ni dad. "I found Mom, Dad, Brooklyn, and Levi."

I noticed how my dad's hands trembles. They were shaking to the point he hides them under his desk.

"Kydel."

"Why?" I asked without breaking our eye contact. "Why did you do this to me? Why did you lie to me? Why did you hide me?"

"Kydel you won't understand—."

"I know I won't understand you. But please, I want to know why! Because all my life I felt something's missing. And I thought it was just Mom. I thought finding her would fill that hole in my heart. But knowing the whole truth, I think that won't work, because I'm missing a whole damn family!" Hindi ko na napigilan ang magtaas ng boses. I'll say my sorry to grandma later.

Nakita ko ang pagtayo ni Dad. Marahan siyang naglakad palapit sa bookshelves na nasa likuran niya. I noticed how he took a book and flipped its pages. Isang litrato ang naroon. Nang makita ko ang litrato ay bigla akong napapikit.

"This was taken when you were in that incubator. I know you'll hate me for being selfish. But I don't regret taking you away from them. I never intended to hide you at first dahil anak ka ng babaeng pinakamamahal ko. Pero ang isiping sa pamamagitan mo magkakaroon pa rin ako ng parte ni Shania, ginawa ko iyon. I love her, and I love you too, anak."

Hindi ko napigilan ang hilutin ang aking sentido. "You're crazy. How—."

"I guess I was, and I still am, because I'm not gonna help you meet them. They're in Pagudpod right?" He said as if he knew everything that's happening with my real family. "I'm taking back all the things I have given you. Your condo, your—."

"I'll give you that f*****g condo, but I won't give anything else other than that. I earned everything what I have right now."

"Kydel!"

"I'm going to meet them."

"You will never meet them. I gave them information about you being in New York."

Kinuyom ko ang aking mga kamao. "Damn you."

"Mahalaga ka pa rin sa akin, pero hindi kita matutulungan na makita ang pamilya mo."

-

"Have you ever thought what would be your mom's reaction if she would meet you right now?" Tanong na ikinalingon ko kay Yuki. She was munching her chocolate cupcake while looking at the vast sea in front.

Isang ngiti ang pinakawalan ko. "Always; until now." Sagot ko bago sumimsim sa hawak na beer in can. "Hanggang ngayon iniisip ko pa rin kung anong mangyayari kapag nagkita na kami. Kung magiging masaya ba siya, kung matatanggap niya ba ako?"

"Hey, they're looking for you for the past twenty years, matatanggap ka nila." An assuring smile formed on Yuki's lips. She was still looking at the sea, and I took that chance to put a kiss on her lips.

"Sweet," I whispered seconds after the kiss.

"W-What was that for?" Gulat niyang tanong bago ako hinampas sa balikat.

I chuckled.

I was about to answer her when my phone rang. Brooklyn's calling. Saglit akong ngumiti bago sinagot ang tawag. "Hey, what's up—."

"K-Kuya Ky." Brooklyn's crying. She's crying. My sister's crying!

Bigla akong napatayo. "Why? What happened? Why are you crying?"

"T-There were guys here kanina. They went inside your condo and throw all your things outside. I took them in my condo. Kuya, what's happening? Do you want me to report them?" She's still crying.

Marahan akong napaupo. I looked at Yuki na marahan ding naupo sa tabi ko. I chuckled. "It's okay, Brook. You don't need to report them. Just take care of my belongings. Uuwi na kami bukas."

I heard her scoffed. "Okay, Kuya. Take care."

Pagkatapos ng tawag ay isang malalim na paghinga ang pinakawalan ko. I guess I got kicked out of my own condo.

Hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin alam ni Brooklyn ang tungkol sa pagkatao ko. I want to surprise her. Gusto kong kompleto kami kapag nalaman nitong magkapatid kaming dalawa.

"You're smiling." Yuki stated.

"I'm just happy because I'm a big brother." That's right. Masaya ako kasi alam ko na ngayon ang pakiramdam kung paano maging isang Kuya. "Finish your cupcakes, para makaalis na tayo."

Kaagad namang sumunod si Yuki. Kaya nang matapos siya ay ipinagpatuloy na namin ang biyahe. Nang makarating sa resort ay parehong bagsak ang aming katawan. We still have time to meet my parents kaya naman napagpasyahan namin ni Yuki na magpahinga na lang muna. We rented a cottage.

"I'll sleep on the—."

"Sa kama tayo matutulog dalawa." Putol ko sa sanay suhestiyon ni Yuki. I knew she'll suggest to sleep on the couch. "I won't take any of your suggestions. We'll sleep on that bed."

"But—."

"I won't touch you, I promise."

Bigla ang pagsasalubong ng mga kilay ni Yuki. I don't know why but I find her cute and it makes me want to kiss her again; this time not just a quick one.

"Wow, you just kissed me an hour ago." She said sarcastically.

I laughed. "I'm sorry about that. You're cute and I couldn't help it."

Yuki tried to smack me when I winked at her. We had a long argument about who's gonna sleep on the bed, but in the end we ended up following my order. Wala siyang magagawa dahil nalaman namin na hindi ganoon kalambot ang couch. Kung tutuusin gawa iyon sa kawayan na may cover lamang na manipis na foam.

"It's just for today. Bukas ay aalis na rin naman tayo." Sabi ko pa bago naunang nahiga. I decided to face the wall. I know Yuki, she would feel awkward kapag sa kaniya ako humarap.

Limang minuto na ang nakakalipas nang mapansin kong hindi pa rin lumulundo ang kama, ibig sabihin ay hindi pa rin nahihiga si Yuki. Kaya naman hinarap ko siya at tiningnan nang mataman.

"What? Are you waiting for me to carry you?" Hindi ko nailagan ang pagbato ni Yuki sa akin ng hawak niyang unan. Natawa na lamang ako nang nakasimangot na nahiga siya sa kama.

Nang makita kong maayos na ang pagkakahiga ni Yuki ay bumalik na ako sa puwesto ko. Nangingiting pumikit ako at ipinagpatuloy na ang pagtulog.

Mga tunog ng kuliglig ang nagpagising sa akin. Nang imulat ko ang aking mga mata ay sumalubong sa akin ang dilim. Napahaba yata ang pagkakatulog ko. Akma akong babangon nang maramdaman ko na tila may nakayakap sa akin. It's Yuki. Nakaunan rin siya sa braso ko, and I realized just now that I'm also hugging her with my other arm. I slowly removed her arm around me. I also tried to carefully take my arm where her head's laying. Nang makaalis na sa ganoong posisyon ay maingat na akong bumangon.

As much as I wanted to stay on that position, I don't want Yuki to despise me. Alam kong kaunti na lamang ay tatamaan na talaga ako sa kaniya. Well, it's nice to annoy her sometimes, but I don't want her to hate because of that.

Binuksan ko ang ilaw. Kumalat iyon sa buong kuwarto. When I looked at the wall clock and saw the time I decided to go to the resort's restaurant to order something for our dinner. I know for sure that Yuki will be hungry after waking up. Hindi naman kasi ganoon karami ang kinain niyang cupcakes kanina.

"We'll deliver your orders to your cottage, Sir." Nakangiting wika ng babaeng nasa counter. Tumango lamang ako at kaagad nang umalis pabalik sa aming nirentahang cottage.

"Kydel!"

Gulat na tiningnan ko si Yuki na patakbong lumalapit sa akin. "Why?"

"They're leaving! I saw them leaving with their luggages!" Sabi ni Yuki bago tumakbo papunta sa daang papunta sa parking lot.

"s**t!" Mabilis akong tumakbo para sundan si Yuki. Oh God, please. Sana maabutan ko pa sila. Kaya ko namang pumunta sa New York, kaya lamang ay malaki ang lugar na iyon at hindi ko alam kung sila hahanapin.

Nang makarating sa parking lot ay naabutan ko si Yuki na hinihingal na nakaupo sa damuhan. She's looking at me while shaking her head. "Nakaalis na sila. I'm sorry."

Napapahawak sa ulong naupo sa tabi ni Yuki. "Don't be sorry."

"I saw them leaving. I just woke up when they suddenly passed by. Sampung minuto pagkaraan saka ko lamang na-realize na sila iyon."

Isang buntong-hininga ang pinakawalan ko. "It's okay. I guess I'll be leaving for New York."

"We can ask Brooklyn about her parents destination."

Umiling ako. "Hindi alam ni Brooklyn kung saan pupunta ng mga magulang namin. Si Dwayne Castro lamang ang may alam."

"Then, we can call them. Let's tell them about you. Sabihin natin na narito ka sa Pilipinas."

"We can do that." Mahina kong sabi bago tumayo. "Pero kailangan kong ihanda ang sarili sa posibleng gawin ni Dad. I don't want my real parents to go through that pain again because of me."

"Hmm, okay."

"Let's go, baka nasa cottage na ang mga in-order ko." Sabi ko na lamang bago hinila si Yuki patayo.

Siguro nga ay maraming paraan para makausap ko ang totoo kong mga magulang. Pero hindi iyon madali lalo pa't matalino si Dad pagdating sa computers. Sa tingin ko nga'y baka ngayon alam nito kung anong ginagawa ko. Baka nga pati cellphone ko ay mga microchip na nakaconnect sa personal computer nito sa bahay.

Oh, please, God. Don't make this hard for me. Gusto ko lang naman makilala ang totoo kong pamilya.