My Bad Alpha Mate (Book 1)

Chapter 9: Choices

Morning broke, the sun's rays reach me and I open my eyes. I cried myself to sleep. I realize I'm naked from the night before and I'm laying by the backdoor. But what I don't get is that my quilt from my bed is covering me and I don't remember wrapping myself in it.

'He did it. He covered us. He cares!' my wolf yips excited.

'Don't get your hopes up. He broke us remember? Remember the pain we felt? The searing burning pain? The pain that caused us to cough up blood? Stupid dog, he doesn't care!' I yell at her.

She whimpers, then closes our link so she can lick her wounds in peace. I hate being so blunt with her, but she needs a reality check. She forgives too easily and hurts too easily. I need to protect both of us.

I stand up needing a bath. There's no shower here, but there is a bathtub. I turn on the faucet and step into the water. I lay in the tub going over the events of last night. Everything I said to him, I meant. But I can't let him see how much he's hurting me. He's hurt me so much that I've had to train myself to ignore the pain when it happens.

Then as if sensing my growing strength, the mind link opens and I hear Keaton pounding into his latest toy. Her gasps and his moans fill my ears. I can almost see him smirking.

'See how easily I can replace you?' His voice asks. It's filled with vengeance. But there's something else there also. Sadness? No it’s not possible.

I close my eyes and focus on the heat of the bath and the soothing of my aching muscles. I feel his link growing weak with my intense concentration. I smile in victory.

Suddenly, I feel sick. I quickly jump out of the bath and make it to the toilet. I vomit up water since I haven't bothered to eat since yesterday morning. This isn't normal. I have an iron stomach. I have a sick feeling of what it is and I check my calendar. Three weeks late. How did I not notice sooner. I run into the bathroom again and rummage through my toiletries for a pregnancy test. I bought it on a whim a while ago for emergencies.

I pee on the stick and set it on the sink waiting for the results. I try to imagine a future if I was pregnant. I couldn't live here anymore if I was pregnant. I wouldn't let him parade his whores in front of our child. I'd leave a raise it on my own, where we could be safe, far away from him.

I look at the results and my hands fly to my stomach. Positive.

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry your father hates mommy. I'm sorry baby," I sob and sit on the toilet.

This baby is going to be my future now. I have to pull myself together and force myself to be strong.

'Be strong for our pup,' my wolf tells me, reopening our link.

'I know. I won't tell him. He'll only hurt me more. I'll leave and take us away from him,' I tell her. I can almost see her nodding in agreement.

I begin to think of ways to leave without Keaton finding out. I can't do it alone. Christina and Rose will help me, they'll understand. I stand up and begin to repack my things. It's a shame I've only gotten to sleep one night in my cottage and I spent it on the floor. I shake off that regret and continue to pack. I link Christina and Rose, careful to keep the link between us private.

'I need you guys. Please come to the cottage. Something's happened,’ I send out.

Their replies are instantaneous.

'Is everything okay?!' Christina's worried voice says.

'I'm on my way dear,' Rose tells me.

'Me too. Stay put Lo,' Chris calls.

I close the link and get dressed. I finish packing in a flash and sit at the dining room table with my pregnancy test sitting in front of me. The front door bursts open and Rose enters with an exhausted looking Christina behind her.

"What's wrong dear?" Rose asks concerned.

I shove the pregnancy test across the table, not saying a word. I let the test speak for itself.

Rose and Christina's eyes get huge and look up at me. I nod sadly, confirming their unspoken questions.

"Oh dear," Rose breathes out, growing weak. Christina quickly helps her into the chair across from me.

"Does he know?" Chris asks worried.

"What do you think?" I snap. Man, I'm going to be one hormonal b***h the next nine months.

"You have to tell him. It's his child too," Chris says, fanning Rose with her hand.

"So he can reject the baby? No. I have to leave, I can't stay here like this. He doesn't want me and he won't want the baby. I'm leaving, I called you to say goodbye and if you both could help me I'd appreciate it," I say to them.

Both their eyes are glassy. I know this is as hard for them as it is for me, but I can see that they understand.

"We'll help, won't we Christina?" Rose agrees, looking over at my best friend.

"Yes, we will. We'll miss you. Promise you'll call and text regularly?" Chris tears up.

"Everyday. I love you both so much. Please don't tell him until I'm gone? I don't want him to find me," I request.

"Not a word until you're far away. I hate the way my son treats you, I didn't raise him that way but it seems that he has a mind of his own," Rose remarks, sadly.

"I know. I would've liked that you could be there to see your grandchild born, but you understand it's safest if I do it alone," I let the tears flow.

"I do. Now we need to get you out of here before he wakes up," Rose tells me.

"He already is. He showed me his early morning activities already," I explain, disgusted.

Rose and Christina mirror the same sympathetic looks that everyone in the pack has given me for weeks. Everyone knows what he's doing to me.

"We can take you through the forest. You can take one of the pack car's. I'll wipe all the information on it so Keaton won't be able to track you. Come on, we need to go," Rose urges.

Christina grabs my two duffle bags while I grab the others. We leave out the back door of the cottage. Rose looks both ways to make sure there are no fighter wolves about. We take off into the woods, walking quickly.

Christina hands my duffles to Rose and runs in the direction of the packhouse to grab a set of keys. Rose and I continue through the woods. About a mile later we reach the main road and wait in the woods for Christina to link us. A silver Mercedes sedan pulls up with Christina at the wheel. She helps Rose put my bags in the trunk. After they finish they both hug me. Tears dripping down their pale cheeks.

"Remember, call and text twice a day. The link won't work once you leave the border of the pack and cut all ties with the pack," Christina informs me.

"Take care of my grandbaby. Get a check up when you get to where you're going. Send pictures once a week so we can see your progress. I love you Lola. So much darling. Don't forget your parents either. They would have loved to see you so mature," Rose kisses my head.

"I love you too. Please remember not to tell him until I tell you to. I will send a text when I cross into another state," I tell her.

She nods and kisses my cheek, she steps aside for Christina to bring on the waterfall of water works.

"I love you so, so, much. You're the only thing I have left of home. Please don't forget about us," she sobs.

"I won't. You're my sister. I love you. I'll contact you soon," I kiss her cheek and give both of them one last hug.

They wave sadly as I get into my car and pull away from the curb. I wave to them and head in the direction of my unknown future.

A mile down the road, I reach the border of Blackwood pack territory. I pull to the side of the dirt road and open the door, getting out. I walk until I stand between the Blackwood territory and no man's land. I place one foot on each side and raise my hand.

I take a deep breath, "I Lola Elisabeth Evergreen and my unborn child, cut all ties with the Blackwood pack and it's members. I leave behind all secrets and honors, I made with the Blackwood pack."

I feel a rush of wind and the break of my link except the one between me and Keaton. Every pack member will feel the break and will be after me within an hour. I have to hurry and leave the state to cover my tracks.

I shiver and take another refreshing breath before pulling my arms around my tummy. Here goes the worst part of this whole thing.

"I Lola Evergreen, reject Keaton Thunders of the Blackwood pack." I close my eyes and prepare for the searing pain. When it overtake my body I wrap my arms around my child, protecting it and taking all of the pain intended for it. It lasts a total of a painful three minutes before fading.

Finally, our bond is broken partially until he accepts it which he probably won't do but it does give me less pain and our bond which enables us to thoughts and feeling is severed. I feel free. This is the start of my new life.

I quickly jump into the car and tear down down the forest path to make up for the lost time of breaking bonds. I have an hour, enough time to get half way out of the state. I'm liberated. He can't hurt me anymore.

'Us,' my wolf wants in on the count.

I roll my eyes, 'He can't hurt me, the baby, or you. Yes, we are free."

My wolf yips happily, excited for our newfound freedom and the future that awaits us.