The Lifetimes I Remembered

Chapter Five: Hannah

It’s been a while since she woke up screaming.

But it’s also been a while since she actually slept.

Hannah stared at the white ceiling of her new room. It’s been a week since they moved to Blue Valley, a week since she started at BVH. It was easy to adjust with the people in this town, no one bothered to ask question, they weren’t privy about your past.

So none of them knew about her family’s story.

For a while, even she had to figure things out. Since she had been discharged from the hospital, the only things that she kept remembering were of her previous lives. She remembered bits and pieces of this lifetime but only the basics, enough for people to believe that she didn’t have amnesia.

But a week here in Blue Valley, somehow, she remembered every bit of information of this lifetime.

January 14, 2017

Entry #14

I’ve mentioned in previous entries that my memories of this lifetime were hazy but now, everything is clear. Like a bolt of lightning, I remembered everything about this lifetime and not just the basics of what roles they played in my life.

For a while, I only remembered that I was almost raped by Jake, that Mitch picked me up and we had ice cream and then had that accident. But before those things, I couldn’t remember much of anything else.

But now I do.

My name is Hannah Michelle Pearce. I’m seventeen. Born on the fourteenth of February, 1999.

I have two older brothers. Mitch and Dominic Pearce. Mitch’s status is deceased. That’s my fault.

My parents are Jefferson and Alice Pearce. My Dad died when I was eleven due to cancer. We spent so much for his treatment which almost wiped away our bank account. That’s why Mitch didn’t go to college and why he had to work two jobs a day. Now that he’s dead, Dom’s doing the same thing which is probably why he hates me because if it wasn’t for me, then maybe he didn’t have to quit college.

We used to live in Orange County since that’s where my Dad grew up but since we lost two loved ones there, we decided to pack up and leave. That and the rumors going on about me were getting out of hand.

I know that it was Jake who started them. He claimed that I had wanted to go to where he was, that I had wanted to do it just as much as he did but he thought that it wasn’t a romantic moment so he refused. We got into an argument and I called Mitch to pick me up.

As for his car colliding with ours, he said he drank so much because of our fight. He thought he could go home, he thought that the five minute drive wouldn’t be a problem; he thought that the road was clear.

He didn’t think that could kill someone.

Jake was the mayor’s son. Everyone believed his lies so everyone blamed me, the hormonal, spoiled brat.

What was I supposed to do against that?

~ Hannah

She closed the notebook and stood up from her mattress. Her room was small compared to the room she had in Orange County. Actually, the entire house was smaller. Since it was just the three of them, Alice bought a small-size bungalow house to shelter them and they couldn’t afford a bigger one anyways.

Hannah heard their front door opening and crept out of her room to see Alice getting inside. “Mom.”

Alice jumped at the sound of Hannah’s voice. She turned to her daughter with her hand on her chest. “You scared me, sweetheart.”

“Sorry. How was work?” Hannah asked, heading into the kitchen. “You want late dinner?”

“Yes, please. It’s as tiring as usual. Dom’s still at work?” Alice asked.

Hannah nodded. “I think he just headed out.”

Hannah placed a plate of lasagna in front of her mother. She sat across from Alice and poured herself a glass of milk. Alice took a bite of her food and looked at her daughter. “How has school been?”

“New. And I like it that way. I can just fit in the crowd without anyone recognizing me.” Hannah said. She never imagined that she will ever say those words, she never imagined that she would rather choose to camouflage amongst the crowd. “I never thought that I’d ever choose to just simply be a part of the crowd. Shutting out everyone is better.”

“Does that also mean that you’re closing your heart too?” Alice asked softly. “Hannah, just because everything didn’t work out well in Orange County doesn’t mean you’re just gonna close yourself off from everyone.”

Hannah turned away from her Mom. “It’s better that way.”

Alice sighed and reached for her daughter’s hand. “Your father and Mitch would want you to be happy, Hannah. And you’re at your best when you’re surrounded with friends.”

Hannah remembered how her friends looked at her the moment she got back to school after the accident, the disgust etched on their faces. If having friends meant having people who were good to you when you’re at your best and bad when you’ve fallen, then she’d rather be alone.

“Hannah, here’s the order for table five.” Hazel said, handing her the paper she had written on. Hannah nodded, wiping the sweat from her forehead. The air-condition was being fixed at the moment and the café was packed with the Saturday crowd as Hazel put it.

Hazel walked behind the counter and stood beside her, wiping the sweat from her brow. “Where the hell is Emerson?”

Hannah could only shrug. She hasn’t met any of the other workers since every time she came to work after school, Ivan was already manning the counter. It was always just her, Ivan and Hazel, she never saw anyone else.

“Hey.” Hannah looked up and met fierce brown eyes. The guy smiled in front of him. “I’ll have my usual.”

Hannah blinked, caught off guard by how the guy looked. Something tugged inside of her heart, he looked so familiar but she couldn’t pinpoint who he was. She waited for a flashback to consume her but there wasn’t one.

The guy snapped his fingers in front of her. “You’re new here? My usual’s iced Americano with two shots of hazelnut.”

Hannah nodded in a daze and punched his order. “That’ll be two dollars and eighty cents.”

He handed her his cash and cleared his throat. “My name’s Keith.”

“What?”

“Keith.” He repeated, smiling. “You would need my name so you could call out my order to me.”

He turned his back on her and Hannah felt someone nudge her. Hazel looked at her with an amused expression on her face. “I know Keith’s good-looking but I didn’t think you’d actually be swayed by him too.”

Hannah tucked a strand of stray hair behind her ear and rolled her eyes at Hazel, acting cool. “My dazedness was probably due to my lack of sleep. I could barely sleep and was awake when my Mom came home.”

“Uh-huh.” Hazel nodded with a knowing smile. The chimes of the door suddenly rang and both of them turned to look at the customer.

A wave of familiarity washed through Hannah but she couldn’t understand why. It wasn’t the same feeling she had when she’d seen Keith. There were no flashbacks either but then again, maybe the flashback only worked with Ivan.

“Emerson!” Hazel snapped, her hands on her knees as she faced the red-headed girl who just entered the café. Hannah’s eyebrows raised, she didn’t peg Hazel to ever be intimidating to anyone. But at least, she wasn’t wearing her weird array of layered clothes because if so, she wouldn’t be taken seriously.

“You’re late!” Hazel reprimanded, shaking her head. “I have a theater practice to rush to and you made me late. Seriously, Emerson, you could’ve called.”

“I’m sorry, Hazel.” Emerson muttered and donned the white apron that Hazel handed to her. Hazel bid Hannah goodbye and purposely ignored Emerson.

Hannah looked at Emerson curiously. She couldn’t shake off the wave of familiarity but she was curious as to why Hazel was hostile to her. For the week that Hazel had clung to her like a leech, she had seen how the eccentric girl had tried to be everyone’s friend but at times had been miserably failing to do so.

“Hi.” Hannah greeted, invading the line the Emerson seemed to have drawn. “I’m Hannah Pearce.”

Emerson glanced at her and nodded. “I know. I saw you on your first day.”

Hannah’s eyebrows rose in surprise. “Oh I didn-.”

“You didn’t see me. It’s okay. I get that a lot.” Emerson replied, wiped the counter and then grabbed a notepad. “You don’t have to be nice to me because you’re new. Everyone else isn’t.”

Just as Hannah’s shift was about to end, Ivan entered the coffee shop, donned in only the café’s uniform which was a black shirt and khaki pants. He grabbed the hat that was required and then looked at Hannah with a small smile, pointing at the apron she was wearing.

So he was the one on the dinner shift. Hannah looked at the clock. “There’s still ten minutes.”

Ivan nodded. “Don’t you want an early out?”

But just as Hannah was about to respond, the phone rang and Ivan answered. He then looked at Hannah and then around the café, searching for someone. “Emmy! It’s for you.”

Emerson rushed to answer the phone and Ivan and Hannah gave her the privacy she needed. When she hung up, the two turned to look at her. The stress was painted on Emerson’s face. She looked at them. “My grandma’s having an episode at the nursing home. They need me there.”

“Go.” Ivan said without missing a beat. “I can handle it here.”

“I’ll cover your shift for you.” Hannah added.

Emerson looked at her. “But you’ve been here all day.”

Hannah merely shrugged. “It’s not like I have anything else better to do.”

Emerson hesitated for a moment but Hannah saw the worry in her eyes. “I’ll make it up to you. Thank you.”

She handed Ivan her apron and then rushed out of the café. Ivan turned to Hannah with a small smile. “I guess it’s me and you and Louis.”

Hannah tried to smile. She had been trying to avoid Ivan all week and was thankful that they didn’t work on the same school days. This would be the first time that they were actually forced to interact.

“I’ll take the orders. You could man the counter.” She said, taking the notepad that Emerson left. But before she could start catering to the new customers, she felt him grab her arm.

Shot of sparks flew on her arms, singing through her veins and making her heart beat faster. She didn’t realize that their faces were so close, close enough that she could see the swirls of green in his blue eyes and the incandescence of light dancing in it too.

“I can do this on my own for an hour, Hannah. You need to rest even just for an hour.” He suggested. He let go of her hand and then turned around, leaning to the small opening where you were supposed to say the order to the cook.

He turned back to Hannah and then pointed at where the employees are supposed to have their breaks. “I won’t accept your buts or your reasons. It’s just for an hour and you had the busiest shift. I’m sure you haven’t eaten.”

Ivan was right, she hasn’t eaten lunch yet but she wasn’t agreeing to what he wanted. “I’m fine, Ivan.”

He simply shook his head and dragged her to the employees’ break section. “Sit down and rest for an hour, Hannah. That’s an order coming from the son of the owner, not from a workmate.”

Before she could rebut on that statement, he turned his back on her and headed to the counter. But he came back with a heaping plate of cheeseburger and fries and a bottle of water. “I asked Louis to remove the pickles. I thought you might not like it.”

Hannah bit her lip and stood up; ready to fetch more mustard and mayo but Ivan grabbed her arm again. “I put extra mayo and mustard. Less ketchup. And don’t assume I’m watching how you eat or if I’m a stalker. It’s just how I prefer my burger too.”

Hannah looked at him, his ocean eyes glinting under the fluorescent lights. She didn’t know how to respond. “I’ll make this quick so I could help you.”

Ivan raised a finger for her to stop talking, smiled and said, “You have an hour, Hannah. Enjoy your food. Don’t worry about me. I know how to swim.”