Irrevocably HERS

Chapter Thirteen

"What the hell did you just say?" I grit out while closing the door and standing there eyeing Vicky with my mind blown. s**t, I thought my night with Amber was explosive but this takes the cake, no matter how much I love my girl.

"I said that I told your w***e that we are destined to be together since you and I are going to be parents. Aren't you happy?" She says with such enthusiasm that the news of parenthood still throws me for a loop. I begin to pace back and forth, trying to do the math in my head, but coming up short. I always used protection with her. We hadn't been intimate since maybe the middle of the month, which was what? Basically a few days ago? It is only the 25th, Christmas.

Shit.

It's Christmas.

"I always wore protection. It can't be mine." I say harshly but she stands taller at my dismissal of her and the baby.

"Well, it is so better come back to reality and face the facts to the bed that you made." She says and I feel boiling anger rising within me.

"It takes two Vicky. This isn't on me. Were you trying to tie me down? Out of all the girls in this town, I didn't peg you for the damn psycho when we first hooked up. What the hell happened to you. You yourself agreed to it being just casual hookups. I never wanted more. Never." I enunciate the word never in a tone laced with nothing but pure venom. This isn't how it's supposed to be. This isn't what I wanted. I was alone and needed some kind of human touch. I should have just become a priest, declared myself celibate.

"One night with you had me wanting more Hunter. I thought you saw that in my eyes every time I came over. It wasn't just s*x to me. It was more than that from the start. If you didn't want me then why did you keep coming back? You knew what you were doing. Don't take me for a fool. Now, before I tell my parents the great news, I want us to have even better news. You need to do the right thing and make us yours Hunter." She says as she rubs her stomach but the action makes me want to vomit.

"I want a paternity test. No. I demand one because I know you Vicky. I know you are two faced. You say you were, are in love with me and want a future and all that but don't think I was blind watching you fawn over every other moron in this town. I saw you with Trevor. I saw you with Mitch. That's why I thought we had an understanding. You didn't seem all head over heels while giving them companionship. So, until I get the results, there is no guarantee that this child is mine. If the tests comes out that I am in fact this baby's father than I will do right by you and the baby girl or boy you are carrying. I will take care of you. I will take care of the baby, but I will not do that being married to you. I will not put us or this child into a situation where he or she will grow up in a home with parents who are in a loveless marriage. I will not allow you to turn them into a pawn just to acquire a wedding ring on your finger." I say which makes her falter.

"You can't just demand a paternity test. You can't just say that you would take care of us without being my husband. That is not how this works. You, me, this baby will be a family Hunter. Just you watch!" She says before prying open the door and walking out. The door closes and I release the breath I was holding, running my fingers through my hair and wanting nothing more than to pull my hair out of my head. I am at a complete loss here. I then remember the small fact that she told Amber everything so I run upstairs, grab my coat, and rush over to Reeve's house.

Once I get there, I ring the doorbell, praying that she is inside. I ring the bell once again, going out of my mind. I can feel my insides quaking, my hands shaking, my body overheated from rushing here. It is Reeve that opens the door this time. He sees it is me and pushes his hand against me and pushes me out of the way so that he can stand outside without having anyone see who he is speaking with.

"Is she in there?" I say quickly, not really needing a bro heart to heart or a reminder of what a giant asshole I am. All I want is to see her, know she is okay, and explain everything to her. Seems like this is a never ending cycle between us, no matter what we say or do, someone gets hurt, even though that someone is always her.

"Listen, I'm not going to stand here and berate you. Not going to tell you what a colossal f**k up you are. It is what is it. With that being said, what I can tell you is that she doesn't want to see you, at all. I don't know what the hell could have happened in the matter of a night between you two nor do I really want to know since she is like my sister, but I can't shake the feeling that this is once again going to kill her. She was doing so good man. I should have never suggested coming back here. I should have known you were still around. If I had known, I could have protected her." He says with his arms crossed against his chest, looking like a protective big brother.

"Like you said, you don't want to know any of the details so just let me talk to her. I need to talk to her. This is just a whole big misunderstanding." I say to him but he just raises an eyebrow at me.

"Misunderstandings don't lead the woman you claim to love returning here with swollen red eyes. That wasn't a misunderstanding Hunter. That was a declaration of something being finalized with certainty. Look, thanks for fixing my car but I think we are done at this point. Whether she ever gets in contact with you is entirely up to her but if it were up to me, I'd make damn sure to keep you away, forever. Merry Christmas Hunter." He says dismissively, heading back inside without another glance my way. My hands ball into fists and I can feel my blood burning through my veins.

Nothing I do will ever be good enough.

I will never be good enough.

You know what?

Good riddance to everything I thought I knew or wanted. Amber is better off without me and if last night was our final time being together than I will cherish the moment forever. I'm not going to put her through this. I made this mess and I will own up to yet another one of my f**k ups.

I simply trudge home, not needing or wanting to deal with anyone at this point. Vicky calls non stop, leaving voicemails and text messages all proclaiming that I need to get my s**t together for this child "we" are having. Instead of answering, or even fighting with her, I just shut my cell phone off and chuck it across the room. As of right now, I'm in extreme denial because I know for a fact that I was always careful when we were together. The only person I went bare with was Amber. Only her. There is no way that I am that baby's father.

My misery and despair lead me to go on an all out drinking binge. Not even sure I can recall the days leading up to today. All I know is that I have been holed up here in my smaller than hell apartment, wallowing in my own self pity. I have had the curtains closed, living in complete darkness like some kind of monster. Maybe I am a monster. A monster who knows how to single handily crush the love of my life's heart repeatedly. It's a damn repeat over and over again. I can't function without her in my life yet when I gain her back, it is like negative karma creeps out of the woodwork and causes chaos to rip her away from me.

A banging on my door makes me groan as I make my way to it. Upon opening, I see Tyler standing outside with two cups of coffee. I walk away allowing him to come in if he dares to see the way I have been shacked up for the past week.

"Damn bossman. The hell is that smell? Damn bro have you been hibernating this whole time in here like some kind of vampire? s**t man open a window. Or five." He says as he looks for a window to do just that.

"Nobody ordered you to come here and break me out of my misery." I say as I take a sip of the coffee that is really needed right now. My diet has been nothing but take out and whiskey.

"No but I had to make sure you were okay. Who is going to sign my paychecks?" He cockily states and I just roll my eyes at him.

"What do you want from me Tyler? You are more than capable of opening the garage up by yourself. You know where everything is. It's your moment to shine. I'm not needed. As you can see, I am quite comfortable living in isolation and darkness." I say as I crash back down onto my couch, looking around at the tragic state of my life, hand rubbing over the beard I am sprouting from the lack of shaving, or showering. Damn I smell like a sewer.

"What you need to do is take a damn shower, shave off that damn beard growing on your face that makes you twenty years older, clean up your mess, and head back into reality bossman. I heard what's going on. You and I both know that Vicky is not all there when it comes to wanting to be with you. Heard she went and asked about that paternity test you requested." He says and my ears perk up.

"Since Reeve's mom is a nurse and all that, she ordered Vicky to come straight to the clinic and everything she would need would be given to her. Vicky protested at first but his mother wasn't having it. She cares about the welfare of that unborn baby and can see that Vicky is in over her head thinking this pregnancy could solve all her problems. She set her up with prenatal vitamins, scheduled sonograms, monthly doctors appointments and a paternity test because she thought it would be best to help a fellow friend of Reeve's, especially since he caught himself in a sticky situation, no pun intended." He says and I grunt.

"And you didn't hear this from me but she is determined to make sure that you are in fact not the father of that baby because she is awfully worried about Amber." He says and I stiffen at the mention of her name.

"Why is she worried about her? What happened? What's wrong?" I say, more like demand and I can see Tyler is nervous about even mentioning that part to me.

"Nothing. Relax bossman. She is back home but she may have been in a slight bit of depression for the remainder of her vacation here. I'm sure she is okay and as a matter of fact, I have my girl checking up on her every now and then. They met each other and they seemed to click ya know?" He says and I can feel my body withdraw from all the tension. I sit back and throw my head back.

"There's no way this kid is mine Tyler. No damn way." I spit as I decide to rise back up from my seat and gather the massive amounts of crushed beer cans lying across my floor.

"You know that. I know that. Even the whole town knows that bossman. So what the hell are you doing hiding from the world when where you need to be is in NY?" He says and I just hang my head in exhaustion.

"You think she'd believe me if I said that I wasn't the father?" I say to which he just gives me a blank face.

"Once I know for certain, I will go to her. For now, I will take it one day at a time until she takes that damn test." I say as I continue cleaning my mess. I tie up the recycling bags and toss them by the front door. I hop in the shower while Tyler makes himself at home perusing through my subscription channels, seeing he has chosen the Lord of the Rings trilogy on Max, when I finally step out of my bathroom freshly showered and shaved.

"How the hell do you focus on that movie? Damn movie is three hours long, per movie." I say as I throw on my shirt and grab my flannel and jacket. He just shrugs like it's no big deal and turns off the tv once he sees I am ready to go.

"You okay bossman?" He says before helping to grab a recycling bag for me.

"Yeah. One day at a time." I say to which he responds.

"One day at a time."

Mrs. Mills said that since Vicky was only about a month along, the paternity test would have to wait until she was about seven to eight weeks. Of course, the news wasn't the greatest but I willed myself to remain patient.

The weeks dragged on, all the while Vicky maintained for certain that I was the father, and had me dote on her hand and foot. She has made me go to doctors appointments with her, look up some Lamaze classes, and even made me watch birthing videos which made me want to vomit. Don't even get me started on the sudden food cravings at only two months pregnant. She would be at the shop in my office demanding a cheeseburger deluxe and I would do my due diligence and run to get it for her. It was like she was already marking me as a married taken man. I only had to keep this charade up until she got the paternity test done.

She has started to buy the baby clothes, shoes, diapers, pretty much the whole damn baby store, all on her parents dime. I am not even sure if she even has ever had a job before. Does she expect her parents to raise the baby for her? Or just expect me to be the money man? The only thing I am adamant about is that she keep everything at her place because I constantly have to remind her that I am not sealing my fate without proof of paternity.

When the day finally comes for the doctor to authorize a paternity test at our what feels like millionth baby appointment, I could see the hesitation in her eyes. She better hope for her sake that the baby is actually mine because I am two seconds away from having a stroke. She reluctantly agrees and I wait out in the waiting area until the process is over. I drop her off at home, really not wanting to do anything baby related, and then drop myself off at work to finish helping Tyler with the cars that are needing quick repairs.

I walk into the diner the next day before heading to work and even the waitress that I banter with every morning can see the tiredness that is seen under my eyes.

"I think I miss the go f**k yourself look you always had on your face. This look you got going on is just too sad. Why don't you get out of this town for a little while? There is nothing holding you back from having a little you time." She says as I wait for my coffee.

"What about Vicky?" I say and she just scoffs.

"What about her? Honey, you and I both know you weren't her one and only. I don't mean to pry but you're a good guy and are being given a dirty hand. When is she due?" She asks and I just shrug because I haven't even the slightest clue to be honest. She hasn't told me when she conceived or her due date. I know I have asked but she keeps dodging the question. Telltale sign of betrayal but I am trying to be the good guy.

"When she went to you that day, how far along was she?" She asks and I think hard.

"I believe about a month." I say based on what Reeve's mom told Tyler.

"Hate to be intrusive but when was the last time you had s*x with her?" She whispers.

It takes me a little while to remember our last interaction. It was probably only mid December when we last did anything together.

"Mid-December. I remember it was a late night when she came and you know how the story goes." I say and she just rolls her eyes. She takes a moment to do the math in her head and I watch as her eyes bug out.

"Honey, if she had you in mid December and came to you at the end of December, like literally a week and a half later, that means she was already pregnant." She says and my brain feels like it was blasted with electricity.

"What. The." I say as I make my way out of the diner, forgetting all about my coffee. I immediately hop into my car and drive to Vicky's house. I pound on the door until she opens it.

"Hunter! Oh thank goodness you are here. I need help putting the crib together." She says but fails to notice the face I am sporting because I can feel myself seething with rage.

All this time.

"Who were you with besides me and for the love of all things holy, do NOT lie to me." I spit and watch as her face falls. She quickly masks her uncertainty.

"I have no idea what you mean Hunter. I may have gone on a few dates but I never had s*x with any of them." She says and I just remain standing by the door.

"So if I go to whoever you went out on a date with in the beginning of December, they're going to tell me that you were a damn saint? I don't buy it for a second and I know you don't either. We hooked up in the middle of December. You came to me at the end of the month. Pregnancy doesn't happen in a snap of your fingers. You have been lying to me." I grit out and she just stands there red handed.

"Why the hell would you do that Vicky?! Why the hell would you tell the only woman I have ever loved that I was the father of your baby when you knew all along for a fact that I wasn't. For f**k sakes Vicky. You majorly upended my life, and for what? Seriously. For what reason did you have to ruin me?" I try hard not to yell but it falls flat.

"Because the father didn't want anything to do with me! You were my best bet at having the life I always wanted for myself. A loving husband, an awesome father to our child. The moment I seen her walking down the stairs all happy and glowing, I knew that she was about to steal my life away and I couldn't have that! You were mine and nobody else's so I made sure to drive her away. Please Hunter. Don't leave me. I need you. The baby needs you." She says with tears flowing down her cheeks but I could really care less. Well, I do feel bad but, she wronged me.

"The baby needs their father and I am not their father. Instead of deceiving people, think about how your actions affect them." I say before leaving. I hightail it back to the garage and inform Tyler that I am taking a couple of days, heading to NY, and for him to look after the shop. Of course he has no qualms about it and wishes me the best of luck. I hop into my car after packing a duffel and program the address of NYU into my GPS.

I'm coming for you Amber, and this time it's for keeps.